c/theonion · by RobotToaster@mander.xyz · 2y

Israel Assures It Doing Everything Possible To Minimize Civilians

https://www.theonion.com/israel-assures-it-doing-everything-possible-to-minimize-1851085308

434 points · 10 comments · view on lemmy.world

10 Comments

TheBat@lemmy.world · 81 pts · 2y (1 reply)

[ removed ]

MindSkipperBro12@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 2y

I thought the news was a tragedy, now I realize it’s a fucking comedy.

Lath@kbin.social · 47 pts · 2y (1 reply)

That's a good play on words.

NoneOfUrBusiness@kbin.social · 5 pts · 2y

Bruh I just realized.

WarmSoda@lemm.ee · 21 pts · 2y

“Let me be clear: Our war is against Hamas. We have explicitly instructed our commanders that they should take pains so there are as few innocent men, women, and children in Gaza as humanly possible.”

Brutal. Well done, Onion writers

maniacalmanicmania@aussie.zone · 17 pts · 2y

🤌

Guillermo@sh.itjust.works · 13 pts · 2y (1 reply)

1.15% of the population already died. Not all of them civilians.

SlopppyEngineer@lemmy.world · 27 pts · 2y

"We've only killed 27.000 people so we're the good guys, you see."

eatthecake@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y (2 replies)

It's

lolcatnip@reddthat.com · 8 pts · 2y

It's not a mistake. Omitting "be" verbs is a common convention in headlines. They're just imitating the style of major newspapers.

WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

Monty Python's Flying Circus!