They never had a chance.

309 points · 11 comments · view on lemmy.world

11 Comments

bennypr0fane@discuss.tchncs.de · 7 pts · 3y

I'm weirdly unsure why, but it totally made me laugh

trouser_mouse@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 3y (4 replies)

An ode to a crusty wank sock I found behind my bed

Oh crusty wank sock

You were my favourite

For one night

You were trusted

With my most intimate part

As well as being relied upon to clean everything up quite well

Now you are so far away

We may never see each other again

But if we do

You will be pumped full of my angry jizz like a one-fingered glove filled with porridge

Amen

brewdtype@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 3y (3 replies)

This is just regular Vogon poetry.

Pantrygheist@programming.dev · 4 pts · 3y (2 replies)

It's too short, not even 30 minutes long

brewdtype@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 3y

They’re not all classics.

trouser_mouse@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 3y

If read out loud at the correct speed with adequate wailing it should easily cover more than 30 minutes!

Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de · 5 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Do Americans actually do this? Like don't you have tissues? And isn't it gross? Or is this some weird circumcision thing again?

trouser_mouse@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 3y

I suspect multiple countries probably have socks, and wank into them even though they also have access to tissues. I bet there is funding available to study this and someone should (after they wash their hands).

bleistift2@feddit.de · 4 pts · 3y (1 reply)

I think that’s a better ending for them than being attacked and eaten alive by a woman’s immune system.

bennypr0fane@discuss.tchncs.de · 3 pts · 3y

Either way, they all die. There's no uproar before that

dewritoninja@pawb.social · 3 pts · 3y

Im sock