Twas the Night Before Christmas....

Twas the night before Christmas

and all through the house

everyone felt shitty

even the mouse.

With mom at the whore house

and dad smokin grass

I settled down

for a nice piece of ass

when out on the lawn

arose such a clatter

I sprang from my piece

to see what was the matter

and out on the lawn

I seen some big dick

and I knew in a moment

it must be St.Nick

he flew down my chimney like a bat out of hell

and i knew in a moment

the fucker had fell

He filled all our stocking with pretzels and beer

and a big rubber dick

for my brother, the queer.

then he rose up the chimney with a thunderous fart

the son of a bitch blew my chimney apart

cussing and cursing as he rode out of sight.

pissing on all

having one hell of a night.