New developments in the pentagon

Be careful, those generals can teleport you to a random Waffle House at any moment

When/if he ever comes out of this blackout, he is gonna be very confused.

Like, I just imagine he's been doing the "super size me (with whiskey)" bit for at least a decade now, you pretty much have to be to be a Faux News host

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tN7HlenTmA

"Whaddya mean 'not qualified'?! Morgan'sh a a a captain! Says sho right there on both bottlesh."

Hoorah for General Guinness of the Dublin Boozaliers

Tbh I'd also make Morgan my advisor. I always get the best ideas when he's around