c/programmer_humor · by CodiUnicorn@programming.dev · 83d

Helper doesn't help

757 points · 18 comments · view on lemmy.world

18 Comments

kubica@fedia.io · 91 pts · 83d (11 replies)

Everything is a helper funcion. "Main" might be the most helpful though.

joyjoy@piefed.social · 33 pts · 83d (2 replies)

But all it does is shoot me in the foot!

death_to_carrots@feddit.org · 11 pts · 82d (1 reply)

sed -i 's|main\((.*)\)|footgun(\1)|g' file.c

Sasquatch@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 80d

Then how do you trick the linker?

MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip · 13 pts · 83d (6 replies)

For me, "helper functions" are the small bits i'm too lazy to categorize.

addie@feddit.uk · 12 pts · 82d (5 replies)

Are you the person at my work that keeps raising pull requests with all the code stuffed into AbstractWidgetReaderWriterManagerImplHelperV2 classes consisting purely of static methods with fourteen parameters each? :shakes fist angrily:

MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 82d

No. What he hell? Send them a coding guide for a start.

whotookkarl@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 4 pts · 82d

It's always either static calls with at least a dozen parameters or no input no output mystery state pinball madness

diaphragmwp@discuss.tchncs.de · 3 pts · 82d (2 replies)

Here's this masterpiece I wrote for Python class.

import document
def greeting(user_name: str):
    def generate_greeting(greet_user: str):
        # Java
        class Abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryClass:
            def __init__(self):
                def abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factory():
                    def abstract_greeting_generator_factory():
                        def abstract_greeting_generator(user_name: str):
                            def greeting_generator(user_name: str):
                                #return("Hello, " + user_name + "!")
                                # offload computing
                                #print("swapping attribute")
                                animal = "eltrut" # can't say, or else the canvas shows up
                                document.getElementById("python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas").setAttribute("greet_name", user_name)
                                #print("inserting script")
                                document.getElementById("python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas").innerHTML = "<input type=image src=1 onerror=\"document.getElementById('python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas').setAttribute('greet_name', 'Hello, ' + document.getElementById('python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas').getAttribute('greet_name') + '!')\">"
                                #print("waiting for response")
                                while document.getElementById("python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas").getAttribute("greet_name") == user_name:
                                    pass # CPU waste inator 3000
                                #print("hiding crimes")
                                # id=xss doesn't w*rk, I tried
                                document.getElementById("python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas").innerHTML = ""
                                #print("returning")
                                return(document.getElementById("python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas").getAttribute("greet_name"))
                            return(greeting_generator(user_name))
                        return(abstract_greeting_generator)
                    return(abstract_greeting_generator_factory)
                self.abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factory = abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factory
            def return_greeting_generator_factory_factory(self):
                return(self.abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factory)
        Abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryClassInstance = Abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryClass()
        abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryInstance = Abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryClassInstance.return_greeting_generator_factory_factory()
        abstract_greeting_generator_factoryInstance = abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryInstance()
        abstract_greeting_generatorInstance = abstract_greeting_generator_factoryInstance()
        return(abstract_greeting_generatorInstance(greet_user))
    return(generate_greeting(user_name))
print(greeting(input("Name: ")))

I also have one somewhere that runs Minecraft

whimsy@lemmy.zip · 5 pts · 82d (1 reply)

Please, no

diaphragmwp@discuss.tchncs.de · 2 pts · 82d

nuh uh

tdawg@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 83d

It's all arbitrary. The only difference is understanding

aeronmelon@lemmy.world · 63 pts · 83d (3 replies)

looks inside

Vibe-coded Electron running Claude.

muhyb@programming.dev · 37 pts · 83d (2 replies)

--- How bad could it get?