When you hear a noise at night and go downstairs to see what happened

162 points · 15 comments · view on lemmy.world

15 Comments

Xanthobilly@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 12d (3 replies)

WatermelonPaloma@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 12d

Love me some Sean Connery in thigh highs!

JimHollow@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 12d

While they don't look alike at all, he reminded me of Borat in the green bikini.

deft@lemmy.wtf · 1 pts · 12d

Zardoz Zord.

SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world · 9 pts · 13d (1 reply)

You don't jam the barrel into your urethra?

okwhateverdude@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 13d

It's already occupied with the cocktail stirrer

Primor@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 13d (1 reply)

NSFW please! I was not! ready for this

nycvin@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 12d

and some eye bleach

EggInDisguise@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 13d

Velcro thigh holster FTW

Also keeping a blunderbuss by the stairs.

QuietGenesis@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 13d

Most American post of all time

SaltSong@startrek.website · 4 pts · 13d

Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

WanderWisley@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 12d

Bout to get clapped with my cheeks out.

TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 13d (1 reply)

So you bring a small cannon...

saltesc@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 13d

I just go back to sleep. Never figured a noise in the house to be anything other than the house, shit falling, or a rodent. All stuff I'm not getting up for and definitely not finding a weapon for.

It has backfired, though. Once, about 30 years ago, a bicycle got taken from the front lawn. That should've been a bullet in someone's head as justice, of course.

altphoto@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 13d

ER.... Code brown!.... Another left ass cheek with a bullet hole!