Don't worry, ladies, I got this

882 points · 27 comments · view on lemmy.world

27 Comments

SirBucksworth@lemmy.world · 79 pts · 2y (11 replies)

Tbh I’m one of the guys trying to carry as many chairs as I can. That’s because I want stuff to be done as fast as possible. So more chairs per run = less time spent doing chores 🤷‍♀️

some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org · 91 pts · 2y (10 replies)

I wanna suck your dick, sir.

DancingIsForbidden@lemmy.world · 61 pts · 2y (9 replies)
[ removed ]
DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe · 28 pts · 2y (8 replies)

You whores are going to hell.

Everyone knows oral is sex, that's why Bill Clinton is a liar and deserves crucifixion.

You need to use the poophole loophole.

jaybone@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y (5 replies)

Wait, oral is sex but anal is not? This is opposite world.

new_guy@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 2y (1 reply)

That's because the anus is the opposite end of the mouth tube. The math checks out.

vivadanang@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 2y

the perverse inverse of the obverse sphincter of course

Peaty@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Technically all sex outside of marriage is verboten.

DancingIsForbidden@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y (1 reply)
[ removed ]
Restaldt@lemm.ee · 5 pts · 2y

Ever heard of soaking

Its only sex if you pump more than twice

Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y (1 reply)
PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocks · 1 pts · 2y

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

relevant Garfunkel and Oates video

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

NegativeLookBehind@kbin.social · 48 pts · 2y (4 replies)

“Omg look how many chairs he’s carrying. I’m gonna fuck the bejesus into him later”

KISSmyOS@lemmy.world · 27 pts · 2y
[ removed ]
ThePyroPython@feddit.uk · 13 pts · 2y (2 replies)
PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocks · 6 pts · 2y

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

Just remember the loophole.

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net · 6 pts · 2y

Holy Christ

Spaghetti_Hitchens@kbin.social · 20 pts · 2y

Ladies. I am so swole on the lord

digger@lemmy.ca · 14 pts · 2y (1 reply)

I've never been able to get more than 4 in each hand of that style and that's hard to manage.

SugarSnack@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 2y

Go underarm, more biomechanically friendly

moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 10 pts · 2y (2 replies)

If yer willing to sit around and ignore the guy talking at you then free pizza was free pizza

INHALE_VEGETABLES@aussie.zone · 1 pts · 2y (1 reply)

You call this bread?!

moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 2y

no

Gabu@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y (2 replies)

POV: you're from the US and enter a Catholic church, only to find they use pews instead of chairs.

Leviathan@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y

Catholic churches have basements with folding tables and chairs and just as much repressed sexuality being expressed through mediocre feats of strength.

moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 2y

Here, fellowship lunch is usually done in a separate area from the main church area, we still have pews, though we don't put them in gyms.

theangryseal@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y

Me after AA meeting is over trying to be useful after being called out for not working the 12 steps.

Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 2y

The only hot date I want already knows where I'm sitting.

imgprojts@lemmy.ml · 0 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Big chairs... Must have a small one and he's trying to make up for it. That's what I would have thought of I went to church. But I don't. I can now think other things 😜.

cyberpunk007@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 2y

But were you trying to get ladies whilst doing so?