Chances are never zero.

664 points · 23 comments · view on lemmy.world

23 Comments

Rudee@lemmy.ml · 25 pts · 2y (8 replies)

Cows kill more people every year than sharks do

cows_are_underrated@feddit.de · 12 pts · 2y (7 replies)

And that's only because we come more often and much closer to cows than we come to sharks.

Shard@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Its also because big ass herbivores are actually really dangerous.

Sharks don't actually like the taste of humans because we're a little too lean. So they won't actively hunt you unless they're starving. There's only really one reason why a shark is out to get you. There's many reasons a herbivore will mess you up.

A big herbivore will fk you up because he's having a bad day and you got too close. Or its mating season and everyone is potential competition. Or they mistook you for a predator cause of their poor eyesight. Or a bird flew away nearby and one of them got startled and now you're in a path of a stampede.

cows_are_underrated@feddit.de · 5 pts · 2y

Sharks may also bite you by accident, because they mistake you for a seal.

How dangerous a bull is also depends on his age. While getting older he will start to lose the fear/respect for humans. This will get to a point where being alone with him is a literal death sentence.

Rudee@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 2y (4 replies)

Speak for yourself, I haven't spent any time coming anywhere near a cow

cows_are_underrated@feddit.de · 2 pts · 2y (3 replies)

That was not what I meant.

explodicle@local106.com · 1 pts · 2y

OMG I didn't even notice your username until just now!

x4740N@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Your username should have been cows_are_udderated

cows_are_underrated@feddit.de · 1 pts · 2y

Lmao

FlyingSquid@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 2y

Octopus1348@thelemmy.club · 12 pts · 2y (2 replies)

There was a 82 year old man who had to pee and couldn't hold it in, so he went to a train track to do it. While he was pissing, a cow from the air crushed him. His death certificate literally says "Death by a flying cow". It turned out that cows were crossing a track and the train hit one of the cows full speed, so it was sent flying right towards the man. He ended up passing away.

cows_are_underrated@feddit.de · 5 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Achievement unlocked: Get killed by a flying cow.

Octopus1348@thelemmy.club · 4 pts · 2y

I saw a comment that read "Bro got the rarest death message 💀"

cows_are_underrated@feddit.de · 11 pts · 2y

Even tho cows are cool as hell, don't mess with them if you don't know them. Especially bulls can easily kill you(and they will do).

Dasnap@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 2y

I literally walked into my grandparents' garden one day and found a cow just hanging out. No one believed me when I went to tell them until they heard it moo. Turns out it had managed to break the fence at a local field and was just roaming.

BachenBenno@feddit.de · 7 pts · 2y

Can't be mad at her, considering all the beef people eat

TastyWheat@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y (2 replies)

It's true. I was nearly killed by a cow. Turned my car into a convertible and missed my head by millimetres.

don@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 2y

So you met a cow and got a new car and a haircut for your troubles. Not bad at all!

Drusas@kbin.social · 2 pts · 2y

Be glad she wasn't a moose.

Armand1@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

This looks like my old student accommodation

wieson@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

Made my brain autofill the rest of the image with the cow standing on two legs and having human arms.

hltdev@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

just wants to use your phone bro

spudwart@spudwart.com · 1 pts · 2y

Cows are angry little vengeance creatures.

They know, and they want retribution.