Prequel Depicts Young Willy Wonka Using Rich Father’s Investment To Buy Already-Successful Chocolate Factory

https://www.theonion.com/prequel-depicts-young-willy-wonka-using-rich-father-s-i-1851049152

407 points · 21 comments · view on lemmy.world

21 Comments

OpenHammer6677@lemmy.world · 78 pts · 2y (4 replies)

Willy Wonka and Venture Capitalism

gibmiser@lemmy.world · 49 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Oompa loompa doompety doo

We have a perfect deal for you

Oompa loompa doompety dee

If you are wise you'll listen to me

What do you get when you buy a company

That is struggling to make any money?

You strip it down and sell all of its parts

And pocket all of the profits

with no remorse

You don't care about the workers' fate

You only care about the growth rate

You know that greed is good and right

You sleep so soundly every night

Oompa loompa doompety da

If you are greedy you will go far

You will live in happiness too

Like the Oompa Loompa Doompety do

Doompety do

Tronn4@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 2y

This guy Oompas

AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

Wrong set! You're supposed to be on the set of Pretty Woman!

refurbishedrefurbisher@lemmy.sdf.org · 1 pts · 2y
Froyn@kbin.social · 52 pts · 2y (2 replies)

It's not a true Wonka movie until they start killing off kids. It's a low bar, haven't seen this version, hoping they clear it in glorious Wonka fashion.

smock9@lemm.ee · 11 pts · 2y

Depends on what you believe about Snowpiercer https://youtu.be/jEX52h1TvuA?si=_fq8mzV8saPiFElz

LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.one · 9 pts · 2y

Funding education: Willy Wonka no

Child murder: Willy Wonka yes

thesprongler@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 2y (1 reply)

But this one explains how he hoodwinks a culture into indentured servitude (I assume)!

EatYouWell@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 2y

Drugs, probably. Or just took a page from the Christianity playbook.

FunkyMonk@kbin.social · 5 pts · 2y (1 reply)

I loved the first one so much, then they made a remake to expand on Mysterous Bombadil Candy past... Man I don't need to know Tom Bombadil's backstory, I don't want to know about wonka's powercreep. NOW THEY ARE MAKING A THIRD REMAKE, AND A SEQUIL BOOK HAS EXISTED THIS WHOLE TIME. This and Trolls just cashing in on that nostalgia is all they know how to do with kids. Turning Red got bawked at but I keep seeing nothing but hype for this crap.

Kiosade@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 2y

It’s because society shits on anything made for or loved by Teen girls. It’s pretty fucked up honestly.

UristMcHolland@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y

Just watched this movie today and loved it. Don't understand the hate in the comments. Oompa Lumpa song and dance, check. Crazy chocolates that make people float and shit, check. Willy Wonka doing weird shit and near-magical feats, check. It's a great movie.

Nobsi@feddit.de · -2 pts · 2y (7 replies)

Did anyone here even watch the Movie?

Monkeyhog@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y

Why on earth would anyone do that?

June@lemm.ee · 2 pts · 2y

I did and I enjoyed it well enough for what it is.

That said, it is not a Willy Wonka movie. It’s something new with the same name.

Peppycito@sh.itjust.works · -3 pts · 2y (4 replies)

I saw the trailer and it was absolute dogshit.

Nobsi@feddit.de · 3 pts · 2y (3 replies)

So you didn't see it. Thanks. Proves my point

Peppycito@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Happy to help. Not sure what point we're proving? That even the trailer is unwatchable?

Nobsi@feddit.de · -3 pts · 2y (1 reply)

That y'all are as shallow and dumb as the kids that hated justin bieber back in the day.

anton@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 2y

That doesn't not follow from the previous statements.