My doctor said I can't go in the water for two weeks after my surgery.

My doctor diagnosed me with "Epiploic Appendagitis", incredibly painful, but not dangerous. Said "It's like appendicitis, but on the other side."

"So... 'Table-of-Contents-itis.'"

I'm loathe to admit that took me a considerable amount of time to get.

And then had the smallest exhalation through the nose