Girls don’t break wind, they shatter it, and that’s why they’re breathtaking. That’s what my grandfather always used to say, until my grandmother stabbed him to death during a mental episode. Would have been funny if she suffocated him, but she didn’t seem to consider my need for irony
Onions are good AND good for you! Sure, they fuel a low-to-medium risk biological agent when digested in sufficient quantities, but it's still better than eggy farts!:)))
17 Comments
Gullible@sh.itjust.works · 122 pts · 1y
Girls don’t break wind, they shatter it, and that’s why they’re breathtaking. That’s what my grandfather always used to say, until my grandmother stabbed him to death during a mental episode. Would have been funny if she suffocated him, but she didn’t seem to consider my need for irony
EddoWagt@feddit.nl · 47 pts · 1y
This was not a comment I expected to read on this post
ailourobor0s@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 25 pts · 1y
whaleross@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 1y
Still a better love story than Twilight.
latenightnoir@lemmy.world · 32 pts · 1y
I hope it's because she ate an onion-heavy dish🥰
Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 9 pts · 1y
Bro what
latenightnoir@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 1y
Onions are good AND good for you! Sure, they fuel a low-to-medium risk biological agent when digested in sufficient quantities, but it's still better than eggy farts!:)))
zealshock@slrpnk.net · 26 pts · 1y
I wish she would come and fart in my bed instead
Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 20 pts · 1y
I knew he was the one when we started laughing at eachother's nighttime farts.
SkyezOpen@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1y
My girlfriend said she knew when I opened the shower curtain and used my dick as a catapult to launch water at her.
Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 1y
Relationship goals
aeronmelon@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 1y
Like hell I’m going to let the girl of my dreams outfart me. The bedroom is going to be a hazmat crisis before I relent!
qyron@sopuli.xyz · 16 pts · 1y
And that's fine.
Mr_Blott@feddit.uk · 15 pts · 1y
proper@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 1y
toynbee@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 1y
I have a deviated septum and therefore almost no effective sense of smell.
I have it on good authority that those around me have taken advantage of this on many occasions.
aeharding@vger.social · 9 pts · 1y
The girl of my dreams doesn’t know how to remove oligosaccharides making food 🤔
socsa@piefed.social · 8 pts · 1y
I can fix her
over_clox@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y
Amber Heard, she dropped a turd...