It's all over for the rest of us...

Good comic but don't feed bread to ducks.

TL;DR:

Here’s a great list of safe-for-waterfowl foodstuffs, which include cucumber, corn, peas, beans, broccoli, beets, squash, flowers, alfalfa, tomatoes, eggplant, bananas (no peel), pineapple, pomegranate seeds, scrambled eggs, dry cat food or dog food, and rice

A certified hood classic

IIRC, this is basically the plot of the Mighty Ducks animated series from the late 90's.

We need them, we need the Goose.