It's basic, but is there anything in the world more satisfying to dice than green onions?

285 points · 45 comments · view on lemmy.world

45 Comments

danc4498@lemmy.world · 27 pts · 327d (5 replies)

If you squint it just looks like green onions.

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 15 pts · 327d (3 replies)

If you don't squint it looks like that too.

dwemthy@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 327d (1 reply)

If you squint really really hard it looks like eyelids

And009@lemmynsfw.com · 2 pts · 326d

Squint harder, now you're asleep.

danc4498@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 327d

You got me, I should have phrased that better.

Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 327d

... Damn. You're absolutely right.

Manifish_Destiny@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 327d (2 replies)

You gonna finish or is this just bait?

Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 326d (1 reply)

Look I was hoping nobody would notice, so thanks you butthead ( <3 )

Manifish_Destiny@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 323d

Someone had to.

TheAlbatross@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 13 pts · 327d (1 reply)

You're so right that it's satisfying to dice green onion and get that beautiful gradient.

Have you tried mincing meat by hand? I get incredible satisfaction wielding two cleavers and going to town on some chicken. It's amazing how quickly it turns from chunks to a fine paste. Plus the sound is astounding. My roommates legit gather because it makes such a ruckus and apparently I get a huge smile on my face whenever I do it.

Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 327d

That sounds AMAZING, though I think my roommates would be more "cower in fear" if I ever got my hands on two cleavers at once (I am a renowned klutz).

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 11 pts · 327d (2 replies)

Is there anything more satisfying in the world to dice...?

Fascists?

Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 327d

Ah, one of those recipes from the little red cookbook

semperverus@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 326d

Have you actually?

Tempus_Fugit@midwest.social · 9 pts · 327d (3 replies)

I find regular onion satisfying too.

danc4498@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 327d

So satisfying it brings tears to my eyes.

cubism_pitta@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 327d

Working out the technique is awesome. Dicing up onions becomes easy and even enjoyable once you know.

Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 327d

Oh, that's a good one. Slicing a nice big onion into thin half rounds is a wonderful sensation.

cupcakezealot@piefed.blahaj.zone · 7 pts · 327d (1 reply)

this was the first thing we learned to dice in culinary school (the high school program)

also chopping up parsley for garnish is so fun cause you just take out all your aggression :P

Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 327d

It's basic, but it's basic for a real good reason...

Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 327d

The best part is when you toss them and all the little interior rings come apart.

pr06lefs@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 327d (3 replies)

dice keep surprising us with their preferences

Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 327d (2 replies)

I feel like there's a reference here I'm just not getting :(

pr06lefs@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 327d (1 reply)

its such a bad joke that its hard to get lol

Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 327d

Oh jeeze, okay that took a while. Lol.

Keepthoseeyeslockedonmine@kinkycats.org · 4 pts · 327d (1 reply)

@Warl0k3 tomato...but only if your knife is sharp enough to avoid the squish!

moody@lemmings.world · 3 pts · 327d

Use a bread knife for tomatoes.

razorcandy@discuss.tchncs.de · 4 pts · 327d (2 replies)
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TheAlbatross@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 327d

I've been playing with this Garnish technique I saw on Chinese cooking videos where you cut a 3 inch section of green onion, flatten it with your knife, then cut it along the short edge to form long strands of green onion. A few of those delicately placed atop a dish, especially one lacking green, really makes it pop

Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 327d

Plating is just so much fun, I have to be careful not to get carried away with it. Rice especially is fun, get the consistency right and you can sculpt it into so many different shapes that accent the food in so many delightful ways and then twenty minutes have gone by, the food's cold and everyone else is complaining...

maxxadrenaline@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 327d

Peppers are pretty fun

scytale@piefed.zip · 3 pts · 327d

I would rank silken tofu above it.

SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 327d (3 replies)

Great shout for no. 1.

I like watermelon too. And chives.

Carrot for the worst

Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 327d (1 reply)

Long, thin carrots can be really satisfying to chop because you can get your knuckles out of the way and just go to town, but god just the feedback of cutting through a properly thick carrot just makes my skin crawl. The squeak-crunch feeling, just no.

Honestly I just get aggrovated by watermelon, our region only gets huge ones so all my knives are too short to get through them in one nice chop. I should get bigger knives, I'm thinking...

SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 327d

Yeah carrots with a consistent thickness are fine. I like watermelons even if it takes more than a clean cut.

The best part is cutting the insides.

Also a 9 inch knife is OK for the task!

Sc00ter@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 327d

Had the same feeling with romaine hearts this week.

tal@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 327d

I'm not a great fount of experience, but depending upon the feel you're going for, maybe potatoes? Jicama?

FenrirIII@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 325d

I like chopping celery because the pitch of the chop changes as you move from a big end to the small one

Oka@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 327d (1 reply)

Ok, but where does the white end and the green begin?

Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 327d

Fuzzy logic -- the white and green exist on a graduated spectrum of intensity ranging from 0 to 100...

hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 327d

Cutting tomatoes with a sharp knife

unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 327d

I dont see any cuboids. Is it still dicing if the result is hollow cylinders? /j

Okokimup@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 326d

Most other things, yeah. I am bad at cutting green onions.

caut_R@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 325d

Weird question, but is there a term for art that has stuff that‘s cut but arranged in a manner that resembles its uncut form like this? I find it oddly satisfying to look at lol

Treczoks@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 325d

The YT channel "Sorted Food" regularly tests kitchen gadgets. They recently had a device to nicely cut green onions.

https://youtu.be/1i4blxyoLuY

Amazingly one episode where both (a chef and a "normal") did not shoot down most of the gadgets.

copd@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 326d (1 reply)
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Warl0k3@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 326d

Most people would know what you mean, but yeah by far the most common name in the states is green onion.