User AryanRebirth1488 from Indonesia just took a gigantic shit into the toilet. Hey, go to the toilet and take a shit more often! This was posted from an X-crete, Elon Musk's newest venture into bathroom products.

over_clox@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 291d (1 reply)

Why even bother with fingerprints anymore, when they now have colon prints?

Context: https://lemmy.bestiver.se/post/688173

Empricorn@feddit.nl · 7 pts · 291d

No, you can't borrow my phone.

HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 11 pts · 291d

Ratemypoo website was quite a trip back in the early 2000s

elvith@feddit.org · 9 pts · 291d (1 reply)

For effective shitposting, right?

bstix@feddit.dk · 3 pts · 291d

It needs the most advanced AI and direct access to LinkedIn to reach maximum efficiency. No prompting required and all cookies allowed. I want all 1049 partners to get an instantaneous feed from my butthole.

Treczoks@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 291d (1 reply)

Let me guess: this is all requiring cloud services.

Natanox@discuss.tchncs.de · 5 pts · 291d

Of course! That health data won't sell itself.

(The device costs 600$, and to actually get access to your data you then have to pay at least 7$ per month in subscription)

myfunnyaccountname@lemmy.zip · 8 pts · 291d

This thing auto posting my poops on every social media platform would be the only reason I would even consider it.

Akanes@startrek.website · 8 pts · 291d

apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 291d

13 years ago The Verge constantly hyping "The Quantified Self" has resulted in this.

Wispy2891@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 291d (3 replies)

Because now you need an app to know if you have diarrhea

Una@europe.pub · 6 pts · 291d (2 replies)

True, but also it would be cool if you could know what microbiome specifically lives in your poop but I'm not sure that's possible with cameras or similar technology

boletus@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 291d

Mmm yes I love companies collecting poop biometrics about me

hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 291d

What if it collected the waste into some kind of chamber with a built-in microscope (combined with a window so you don't touch the shit), so that you could have a look at it yourself, as a little science project? Fun for the whole family!

neuracnu@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 291d

Skeets & toots ahoy!

hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 291d

Who doesn't want their Instagram followers to know about their UTI before they do?

Grass@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 291d (1 reply)

does it photo the tip of the dick and balls dangling dangerously close to the piss and shit water?

Natanox@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 291d

Perhaps it can give you a warning about that in the app. "Warning: Dingdong too long, offspring fountains in danger"

icelimit@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 288d

Only now have we managed to automate the role of the groom of the stool

bcgm3@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 291d

[ removed ]