A guy walk into a bar and pulls out a scale model of a grand piano, as well as a wooden puppet. The puppet immediately animates and starts playing the piano.
After a perfect performance of Mozart's piano sonata No.11, the puppet gets up, bows to the audience and falls lifeless to the ground. Everyone is astounded.
The bartender asks the guy: "That was great! If you don't mind me asking, where did you get a puppet like this?"
The guy hands him an old golden oil lamp. "You see, I found this lamp. If you rub it and say what you want, a genie pops out and grants the wish. Give it a try, if you want!"
The bartender is sceptical, but tries anyway. "I wish for a million bucks!" Immediately the bar is filled with a giant flock of ducks. On the tables, on the bar, on the ground, ducks are everywhere.
"What the fuck?! That's not what I asked for!"
The guy chuckles. "O yeah, the genie is hard of hearing. Did you really think I asked for an eight inch pianist?"
17 Comments
GraniteM@lemmy.world · 62 pts · 273d
Very NSFW:
Oglaf: Column
Velypso@sh.itjust.works · 8 pts · 273d
1
CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 272d
What you just said, reminds me of a shock/sex video. Can't find the video, but here is urban dictionary explaining it.
elDalvini@discuss.tchncs.de · 45 pts · 273d
A guy walk into a bar and pulls out a scale model of a grand piano, as well as a wooden puppet. The puppet immediately animates and starts playing the piano.
After a perfect performance of Mozart's piano sonata No.11, the puppet gets up, bows to the audience and falls lifeless to the ground. Everyone is astounded.
The bartender asks the guy: "That was great! If you don't mind me asking, where did you get a puppet like this?"
The guy hands him an old golden oil lamp. "You see, I found this lamp. If you rub it and say what you want, a genie pops out and grants the wish. Give it a try, if you want!"
The bartender is sceptical, but tries anyway. "I wish for a million bucks!" Immediately the bar is filled with a giant flock of ducks. On the tables, on the bar, on the ground, ducks are everywhere.
"What the fuck?! That's not what I asked for!"
The guy chuckles. "O yeah, the genie is hard of hearing. Did you really think I asked for an eight inch pianist?"
Hupf@feddit.org · 26 pts · 273d
https://xkcd.com/532/
Buffalox@lemmy.world · 35 pts · 273d
That's not a cock, that's a hen.
My guess is the joke was supposed to be about something about a big cock.
Otherwise I simply don't get it.
usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca · 19 pts · 273d
How can you tell? It's so crudely drawn it could go either way.
Could've drawn a tiny guy playing the piano if we're recycling old jokes.
Buffalox@lemmy.world · 25 pts · 273d
Try to look up white hen, and then look up white cock.
EfreetSK@lemmy.world · 29 pts · 273d
You're right, the "white cock" gave very different results
webghost0101@sopuli.xyz · 7 pts · 273d
It’s a pedantic difference sir, but it checks out.
thethunderwolf@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 4 pts · 272d
JohnnyEnzyme@piefed.social · 1 pts · 272d
Gullible@sh.itjust.works · 13 pts · 273d
“I wish I had a giant cock!”
Intense wheezing appears behind you as the unnatural cockerel struggles to survive under its heft and heat
“Yes, suffer as I do.”
The wish going as intended seems a bit worse
callyral@pawb.social · 7 pts · 272d
"When i said I wanted a big chicken i meant a big chicken sandwich"
desiccated_event@piefed.blahaj.zone · 7 pts · 273d
Old joke, older connotations...
hOrni@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 273d
Better than a midget playing the piano.
EnsignWashout@startrek.website · 3 pts · 273d
Ohhhh... It took me (checks post age) seven hours to get it.
ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de · 7 pts · 272d
Most original joke
notreallyhere@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 266d