c/boycottus · by GlitchyDigiBun@lemmy.world · 227d

Need Feedback: Leaflets for Anti-ICE Protests

Planning to print these out and get a protest crowd singing. Then, we'll plaster them around my local city.

Artwork is not mine and I've reached out to the artist to approve the use of the background.

Does anyone have any critiques/ideas about the layout/content? Planning to print 2 each on a landscape 8.5x11.

28 points · 6 comments · view on lemmy.world

6 Comments

GlitchyDigiBun@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 227d (2 replies)

Version 2:

streetfestival@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 227d (1 reply)

Sorry for providing suboptimal help 😅. I've now got the melody in my head and understand you want to sing the whole song and not just BC, BC, BCCC
For others: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bella_ciao - watch the video with the accordion player
To be brutally honest, I liked the lyrics (and text, including 'gonna) of V1 better - both for metre (how it sounds singing) and consistency in feel (tone) of the song
I prefer the last line in V2, but you might find a better one
I think this may be my best suggestion of all. Put a few musical notes around the margins or some other heads-up that these are lyrics to sing (hold onto this paper). "sing along" or "lyrics". Musical notes might be subtle but effective
~~You could maybe move the lower left text about the origin right beside/under the "Bella Ciao" title~~

I wish I could sing with you and the group of people at the protest you'll be going to! ❤️ Bella Ciao, Bella Ciao, Bella Ciao Ciao Ciao!!! 🎶

streetfestival@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 227d

Suggestion for the last line :): My/Our fight for freedom brought me here.

streetfestival@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 227d (2 replies)

Thanks for resisting ✊. Providing ideas in case any are helpful (probably not). Full disclosure, I don't know the meaning of the song

I think there might be room for a third period to the ellipsis at the top
Second paragraph: It might make sense to remove the ' before "gonna" - but I'm not sure
Last paragraph, a few ideas. "I'll be in prison" might make some people uncomfortable (as in "am I in danger?"). Singling out Renée and Alex is singling out ICE's two recent white & non-Hispanic killings among their predominantly Hispanic/BIPOC killings. In the interest of gender equality, can it be suggested that Bella protests too versus staying home

Neat idea, and thanks for sharing some inspiration!! Stay safe. ✌️ & ❤️

GlitchyDigiBun@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 227d (1 reply)

Thank you for your support and insights!

Firstly, the background image is not my own. The artist is listed bottom-right and I have their permission to use this piece.

Will look into the apostrophe. You may be right.

Lastly, yes... I recognize that I'm only including the most high profile killings in this rendition. It's unfair to single them out but I needed the stanza to end concisely. The original Chumbawumba lyrics go "the sunlight dragged me here."

As for Bella. She is not a girl. She is the concept of beauty and peace. The original song, an Italian antifascist folk song, is saying "goodbye beauty/goodbye beautiful." Bella isn't the girl you leave behind to fight, she's the peaceful life that you're forsaking to do so.

streetfestival@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 227d

Bella isn’t the girl you leave behind to fight, she’s the peaceful life that you’re forsaking to do so

tysm for explaining that! All the best 🥰