[OC] Who Painted This Cat Black?

Who painted this cat black?
I need to know the hack.
He looks like midnight grew some legs
And learned to steal my snacks.

Who painted that one white?
He's powdered sugar & bright.
He watches every dumb decision
Like he's getting paid tonight.

One says, "Parkour!" off the bookshelf.
One says, "Don't involve me."
One commits twelve little felonies.
One provides the commentary.

One is soot and bad ideas.
One is clouds and class.
Together they're a balanced meal
Of elegance and ass.
(Am I allowed to say that, do I get a pass?)

Who painted this cat black?
Who painted that one white?
Who looked at yin and yang and thought,

"Let's make 'em both a little shite."