hypocrisy

903 points · 37 comments · view on lemmy.world

37 Comments

TimeSquirrel@kbin.social · 111 pts · 2y (9 replies)

"No offense, but..."

[Offends]

maltasoron@sopuli.xyz · 30 pts · 2y (5 replies)

"Needless to say,..."

[Says it anyway]

Nelots@lemm.ee · 19 pts · 2y (4 replies)

I like the idea of people saying "Needless to say..." and then just ending their sentence, leaving you wondering what they planned to say.

captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works · 13 pts · 2y

That's a fantastic joke from Futurama. At Farnsworth's...roast?...Bender steps to the podium and says "And now, a man who needs no introduction, " and walks off.

lugal@lemmy.ml · 6 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Needless to say

u202307011927@feddit.de · 3 pts · 2y (1 reply)

I'm sitting here for 16 hours now wondering about what you wanted to say!

lugal@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 2y

Needless to say I know it neither

BeardedSingleMalt@kbin.social · 20 pts · 2y

"I don't wanna talk about it..."

[Proceeds to talk about it for 15 straight minutes]

CaptainBlagbird@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 2y (1 reply)

I'm not racist, but [racist shit]

lugal@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 2y

"I'm not racist but I prefer oranges over apples." – "But that's not racist at all." – "I literally said I'm not racist."

chevy9294@monero.town · 68 pts · 2y (7 replies)

What will happen if you reply just "ok"?

Sharpiemarker@feddit.de · 27 pts · 2y

Death

smashboy@kbin.social · 13 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Dishonor

MelastSB@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Just on him, or also on his cow?

IDriveWhileTired@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y

On his whole house!

SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y

I prefer a thumbs up.

Hupf@feddit.de · 6 pts · 2y

Ducks.

xusontha@ls.buckodr.ink · 6 pts · 2y

Nah just respond with this lol

hessenjunge@discuss.tchncs.de · 34 pts · 2y (12 replies)

Well, it says “i’m speechless” not “i’m lost for words”. 😀

Vigge93@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 2y (3 replies)

Now I imagine them just writing an incoherent string of words. "Tomato car house fireman oven duck garden rice..."

OpenStars@kbin.social · 10 pts · 2y

Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV.

United Sheesh of Americas.

The list can go on as long as you want it to. :-P

MooseBoys@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y

Don’t try to guess my password.

hessenjunge@discuss.tchncs.de · 2 pts · 2y

Isn’t that a classic too? As in your mouth runs off and your brain trails behind. Later you ask yourself wtf you just said. I hate when that happens, especially during job interviews.

casmael@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 2y (7 replies)

Interesting what kind of distinction do you draw between speech and words? 🤔

FiskFisk33@startrek.website · 21 pts · 2y (5 replies)

I'm sitting here in complete silence typing this comment out, I'm not using my speech. I am however using written words.

wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Technically you aren't using written words, but typed ones. Unless you are using some written-to-ocr system, but the end result is the same.

FiskFisk33@startrek.website · 2 pts · 2y

touché

hessenjunge@discuss.tchncs.de · 2 pts · 2y

Perfect answer. 🙂

Sneptaur@pawb.social · 1 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Boooooo

xXSirDanglesXx@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

"That's right, use words!"

hessenjunge@discuss.tchncs.de · 5 pts · 2y

FiskFisk33 already answered it. It’s about speaking vs. writing/ using language.

On a serious note (and thereby killing the joke completely): doesn’t everyone know the situation where you can’t get the word out that may be very well in your head?

mo_lave@reddthat.com · 15 pts · 2y (1 reply)

I'm trying to be ironic, but this is unironically irony.

lugal@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 2y

You forgot the /s at the end.

speaker_hat@lemmy.one · 10 pts · 2y

TLDR;

toy_boat_toy_boat@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y

reminds me of the super best friends speech from south park back in the day

casmael@lemm.ee · 5 pts · 2y

The scandal

bobbytables@feddit.de · 1 pts · 2y

I mean how would I know what I think if I can't hear what I'm saying read what I'm writing?