the future is now, old man

571 points · 50 comments · view on lemmy.world

50 Comments

Currens_felis@lemmy.ml · 74 pts · 2y (3 replies)

Where do I become a holy fool?

realitista@lemm.ee · 36 pts · 2y

Your local church

Deadeyegai@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Right? Like does it come with good benefits and a 401k match too? I mean I'm already sold but the highwayman job is quite lacking in that space. Asking for a friend

photonic_sorcerer@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 19 pts · 2y

Have you seen those televangelists? They make fucking bank.

jayemar@lemm.ee · 67 pts · 2y (8 replies)

I didn't realize train robber was still an option

Rakonat@lemmy.world · 24 pts · 2y (3 replies)

An entire life of shennigans and mischief wasted, I COULDA ROBBED TRAINS?!

SturgiesYrFase@lemmy.ml · 32 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Also coulda been robbing banks with an avocado, but like me you've been mooching around like a goddamn chump....

Emanuel@lemmy.eco.br · 9 pts · 2y (1 reply)

"All warfare is based […]"

rostby@lemmy.fmhy.net · 3 pts · 2y

“Anything can be a weapon if you try hard enough”

son_named_bort@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 2y

Why do you think public transportation is popular with the youth?

redballooon@lemm.ee · 8 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Well the goods have become larger and heavier, you'll probably need to kidnap the train before you can rob it.

figaro@lemdro.id · 6 pts · 2y

I suppose I could utilize a larger train to kidnap the train

Honytawk@lemmy.zip · 5 pts · 2y

It was never NOT an option.

We do still have trains, don't we?

Kolanaki@yiffit.net · 50 pts · 2y (10 replies)

"I wanna be TikTok when I grow up."

"You want to make content for TikTok?"

"No! I want to be the app!"

Bread@sh.itjust.works · 19 pts · 2y (4 replies)

It sounds stupid, but kids are stupid. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a police car. Not a cop, the car. Sometimes dreams need to stay dreams.

jarfil@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Well, have you ever seen a police car break any laws? Your dream was great, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Bread@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 2y

I appreciate it, but I changed course and switched to IT. I grew up to be a server rack now and it has been great!

Smokeydope@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Never give up on your dream, it might just be possible with enough cybernetics and plastic surgery! The future is now!

Bread@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 2y

I can't remember, but do the cars eat at any point? What do they eat?

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 2y (1 reply)

I want to be a firetruck

pedro@lemm.ee · 8 pts · 2y

I'm Idaho

son_named_bort@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 2y

As a young boy I dreamed of being a baseball.

Honytawk@lemmy.zip · 7 pts · 2y (1 reply)

"I want children to be addicted to touching my body with their grubby little hands"

Preciseid@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 2y

A few Catholic priests, salivating, enters the chat.

capy_bara@lemmy.world · 49 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Up yours, woke moralists! We'll see who cancels who

SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml · 8 pts · 2y

Cancellation incoming

Smokeydope@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de · 47 pts · 2y (4 replies)

Just the stuff thats visible here is already more than 100% lol

AeonFelis@lemmy.world · 45 pts · 2y

Which is why you don't see "mathematician" on the list.

rockerface@lemm.ee · 27 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Maybe some kids want multiple jobs

surewhynotlem@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 2y (1 reply)

No one wants two jobs, but the kids these days know they'll need it

pedro@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 2y

Many kids would like to be a teacher on Monday, an astronaut on Tuesday, a veterinarian on Wednesday, ....

But I guess here the demographic is a little older than my example so it might not apply

pizzahoe@lemm.ee · 35 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Woke moralist. The destroyer of Jordan Peterson.

Honytawk@lemmy.zip · 15 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Pretty sure that was the benzos

Fedizen@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

Woke Moralists and Benzos handshake meme: Destroying Jordan Bitchass Peterson

LillyPip@lemmy.ca · 30 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Hey fellow kids! Who wants to be a woke moralist, amirite?

(e: I had a son, so I do believe the 11.9% train robber stat, tho)

devdad@programming.dev · 21 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Had? I hope you’re ok.

LillyPip@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 2y

Oh no, he’s fine. Poor choice of words; he’s all grown up now is all.

ZILtoid1991@kbin.social · 21 pts · 2y (6 replies)

I'm a wojak artist.

capy_bara@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Prove it

ZILtoid1991@kbin.social · 8 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Here's a creation of mine.

troglodytis@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y

Woah

FlyingSquid@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y (2 replies)

What the fuck is wojak?

Honytawk@lemmy.zip · 11 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Here are some examples:

FlyingSquid@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y

I see. I never really got that thing. I guess I'm too old.

PatFussy@lemm.ee · 14 pts · 2y

Real human bean

virku@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y (2 replies)

I guess my toddlers aren't main stream then. One wants to be a policefiremantruck and the other a snail tamer.

turbowafflz@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Snail tamer sounds like an amazing job

Thranduil@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

Its very dangerous. A feral snail can be more deadly than the monthy python rabbit. The tend to be cool tho

OpenHammer6677@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y

Dang those kids can spell Beaureaoucrat

FlyingSquid@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
[ removed ]