I think the truth is women do like muscly men, but men tend to overestimate how muscly. Like swimmer physique is attractive, hollywood batman physique is male power fantasy; or something
I can't speak for every woman, but I can speak for my own experiences and report based on the things women I know have said. For me and those I've spoken to, we may like muscles, but the things you need to do to get those muscles often aren't as attractive and cancel it out. Like, if you're getting muscles by going to the gym every day, that's only gonna attract women who are enthusiastic about the gym. If you get them from farm work, you'll attract women enthusiastic about farm life.
That's why a lot of us like dad bods so much. It's not that it's inherently more attractive, it's that it's a body type achievable by living the kind of life style people who're into that enjoy.
In other words, yes, muscles can be attractive, but not nearly as attractive as shared hobbies and interests, and it just happens quite often muscles can be a quick indicator that you probably don't share many.
I got big arm from the gym once and even women who never went to the gym couldnāt resist peeking at them.
You make it sound like the muscles are only interesting as a sign of lifestyle.
No, in my experience women find muscles viscerally and directly arousing, not just an indicator of compatible lifestyle. Women like muscles the way men like boobs: before thinking.
I wasn't intending to say we only like muscles as an indicator of lifestyle. I was saying they're also an indicator of lifestyle, so even if we are attracted to them we may still pass because it doesn't match the kind of personality we prefer, and personality is generally a lot more important to us than appearance (generally, but not always.)
For instance, I find muscles attractive. I like that they show somebody's interested in staying healthy, but I don't generally date muscular men simply because I'm not into the fit lifestyle. I much prefer a guy who's more likely to join me playing my favorite games or watching my favorite movies, because I'm a nerd and those are the things I like, and a guy who's a little chubbier tends to be exactly that kind of guy.
All the nerds who go to the gym just quietly shed a tear.
I also think that men (of which I am one) tend to overestimate just how much women appreciate muscles. Naturally it's a spectrum but I at least have the experience that men believe that getting muscular will automatically award them with adoration from women when that seldom seems to be the case.
Youāre close. The real truth is that most average people do not like to date too high above their perceived range of attractiveness. This bears out in many studies but people are attracted to 8ās and 9ās but wonāt date them and instead mostly date people that are more normal 5,6,7ās.
Then we look at the opposite side of the coin, 9ās and 10ās donāt even want to date each other. And for good reason. Extremely attractive people often cross a line into narcissism or being too busy to hold a relationship.
So two factors: 1. Most people arenāt extremely fit and so donāt want to date people whose lifestyle does not match their own, weāre all also slightly insecure. 2. Extremely attractive partners tend not to be good partners. The more people that are attracted to you, the less that date you. Also thatās out of fear of competition and effort so itās not worth it.
Yeah, I think in general it starts with trying to impress women, then you do it to impress other guys.
I guess itās similar for women, they might get into doing their make up and looking nice for attention from guys they like, but in the end theyāre mainly trying to impress other women or just doing it because they enjoy it.
My favorite psychology professor likes to say that human males organize themselves into a status hierarchy, then females tend to be most attracted to the males at the top of that hierarchy.
What this implies is that men are basically electing, themselves, the other men who will pass their genes along to the next generation.
Yeah Iāve got a little gay in me and like a powerful frame, but the super lean, cut bodybuilder look just strikes me as weird. Like a balloon animal made of thin, greasy skin.
You need to find a new gym. The growing process is slow and difficult, but with enough chicken breast and broccoli I too will soon have cat ears others will envy
After an enormous number of Mandela Effects appeared in my life, my ears are now developing little points like elf ears. Itās weird. Apparently in this universe Iām part elf
OP, ever heard of a gym thot? Do you.. even go to the gym? 9 times out of 10, females going to the gym are only focusing on thighs and angus. 1 out of 10 is actually training for sport/competition.
Though on a less shitposty note, while I like an athletic build on women, I don't get the obsession with thighs and ass. Disproportionately large thighs turn me off whether they are large because of fat or muscle. Though they are often not toned and don't look fat elsewhere, so maybe a lot of them are implants/injections?
Everyone has their preferences, but I gotta wonder if this is based on something other guys actually like or just something marketers have sold to a segment of the population. I wonder the same about breast implants because a lot of those also do more to turn me off than on.
Yep, I personally like athletically built women, proportional especially. Olympic lifters, gymnasts, and cross fitters tend to develop well rounded physiques.
Some dudes in the incel scene like to use it to dehumanize women. So of course everybody on lemmy now believes that you're on of those the second they read that word.
If you've never seen an woman's Angus at the gym, strolling through the aisles of the local Netto to clown the cheapest brew known to man... then I don't know what to tell you
104 Comments
TheBat@lemmy.world · 98 pts · 2y
Geometrinen_Gepardi@sopuli.xyz · 34 pts · 2y
This fight was lost decades ago, but I understand.
marcos@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 2y
Did the alot win?
Fedizen@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 2y
It won alot, but in the end it lost alotmore
GBU_28@lemm.ee · -8 pts · 2y
Language evolves.
lugal@sopuli.xyz · 9 pts · 2y
True! How ain't people not understand this?
GBU_28@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 2y
Seriously, it disgusts me, but apparently we have to respect it.
Big one for me is how no one says "to be" anymore.
Like "fence needs fixed" rather than "fence needs to be fixed"
DaPorkchop_@lemmy.ml · 16 pts · 2y
What? People say that? I've literally never heard anyone speak that way unless they were either non-fluent speakers or doing a caveman impression.
GBU_28@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 2y
Yes. Very common in the south, and in less educated communities
machinaeZER0@lemm.ee · 8 pts · 2y
I've heard "fence needs fixin," but not this - "needs fixed" mixes tenses too š¤
GBU_28@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 2y
It is horrific, we live in hell
CaptainEffort@sh.itjust.works · 0 pts · 2y
ā¦Iām so glad I donāt live in the south
GBU_28@lemm.ee · 0 pts · 2y
Same but it isn't unique to
0ops@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 2y
intensely_human@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y
Yes, that is still the question
lugal@sopuli.xyz · 3 pts · 2y
I dislike some conservative forms but sometimes use other old forms because I like this. This is a free country.
I don't have strong feelings about English and you won't be able to relate to the examples in my native language so I leave it here
li10@feddit.uk · 67 pts · 2y
Do women actually like strong biceps?
I feel the more you go to the gym you realise that you just do it to impress other menā¦
byroon@lemmy.world · 54 pts · 2y
I think the truth is women do like muscly men, but men tend to overestimate how muscly. Like swimmer physique is attractive, hollywood batman physique is male power fantasy; or something
Sombyr@lemmy.zip · 21 pts · 2y
I can't speak for every woman, but I can speak for my own experiences and report based on the things women I know have said. For me and those I've spoken to, we may like muscles, but the things you need to do to get those muscles often aren't as attractive and cancel it out. Like, if you're getting muscles by going to the gym every day, that's only gonna attract women who are enthusiastic about the gym. If you get them from farm work, you'll attract women enthusiastic about farm life.
That's why a lot of us like dad bods so much. It's not that it's inherently more attractive, it's that it's a body type achievable by living the kind of life style people who're into that enjoy.
In other words, yes, muscles can be attractive, but not nearly as attractive as shared hobbies and interests, and it just happens quite often muscles can be a quick indicator that you probably don't share many.
badcommandorfilename@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 2y
Dad Bod Workout = lifting up small children several times a day
tetris11@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 2y
Dad Bod Workout = flexing a beer can several dozen times an hour
slackassassin@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 2y
That's called the cool down.
MonkderDritte@feddit.de · 1 pts · 2y
intensely_human@lemm.ee · -2 pts · 2y
I got big arm from the gym once and even women who never went to the gym couldnāt resist peeking at them.
You make it sound like the muscles are only interesting as a sign of lifestyle.
No, in my experience women find muscles viscerally and directly arousing, not just an indicator of compatible lifestyle. Women like muscles the way men like boobs: before thinking.
Akasazh@feddit.nl · 4 pts · 2y
So from your experience of not being a woman, you've deducted what woman want.
About that very same confusion books were written and movies were made.
undergroundoverground@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
I'm not a dog but I'm fairly certain all the dogs I've met want to be fed some kind of meat intended for human consumption or cheese.
Does my lack of being a dog make this untrue?
I'm sure the market for "magic Mike, the dad-bod edition" will pick up any minute now.
Any minute now.......
Akasazh@feddit.nl · -2 pts · 2y
Let me just say I pity your dog
undergroundoverground@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
Let me just add that your evading answering the question says all that needed to be said.
Also, how can you feel sorry for them? You're not a dog. Therefore, you couldn't possibly have any idea what they might want.
Sombyr@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 2y
I wasn't intending to say we only like muscles as an indicator of lifestyle. I was saying they're also an indicator of lifestyle, so even if we are attracted to them we may still pass because it doesn't match the kind of personality we prefer, and personality is generally a lot more important to us than appearance (generally, but not always.)
For instance, I find muscles attractive. I like that they show somebody's interested in staying healthy, but I don't generally date muscular men simply because I'm not into the fit lifestyle. I much prefer a guy who's more likely to join me playing my favorite games or watching my favorite movies, because I'm a nerd and those are the things I like, and a guy who's a little chubbier tends to be exactly that kind of guy.
Pelicanen@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 2y
All the nerds who go to the gym just quietly shed a tear.
I also think that men (of which I am one) tend to overestimate just how much women appreciate muscles. Naturally it's a spectrum but I at least have the experience that men believe that getting muscular will automatically award them with adoration from women when that seldom seems to be the case.
tetris11@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 2y
it's called morbid curiousity, like looking at an elephant sitting in arm chair
CleoTheWizard@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y
Youāre close. The real truth is that most average people do not like to date too high above their perceived range of attractiveness. This bears out in many studies but people are attracted to 8ās and 9ās but wonāt date them and instead mostly date people that are more normal 5,6,7ās.
Then we look at the opposite side of the coin, 9ās and 10ās donāt even want to date each other. And for good reason. Extremely attractive people often cross a line into narcissism or being too busy to hold a relationship.
So two factors: 1. Most people arenāt extremely fit and so donāt want to date people whose lifestyle does not match their own, weāre all also slightly insecure. 2. Extremely attractive partners tend not to be good partners. The more people that are attracted to you, the less that date you. Also thatās out of fear of competition and effort so itās not worth it.
li10@feddit.uk · 4 pts · 2y
Yeah, I think in general it starts with trying to impress women, then you do it to impress other guys.
I guess itās similar for women, they might get into doing their make up and looking nice for attention from guys they like, but in the end theyāre mainly trying to impress other women or just doing it because they enjoy it.
intensely_human@lemm.ee · -3 pts · 2y
My favorite psychology professor likes to say that human males organize themselves into a status hierarchy, then females tend to be most attracted to the males at the top of that hierarchy.
What this implies is that men are basically electing, themselves, the other men who will pass their genes along to the next generation.
BestBouclettes@jlai.lu · 2 pts · 2y
People usually like the physique, not the commitment it needs to get there and maintain it. Plus, the steroids.
eestileib@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 2y
Lots of women like really jacked dudes (and many gay men of course).
I don't like super lean jacked dudes personally. Give me a big thick rugby player or a 125Kg sumo wrestler any day over a bodybuilder.
dependencyinjection@discuss.tchncs.de · 5 pts · 2y
Yeah and lots donāt.
Lots like short guys, and lots like tall guys.
Lots like ginger guys and lots donāt.
Almost like there isnāt a universal metric for what people like.
eestileib@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 2y
Yes. That's why you may notice I used the first person singular pronoun in my post.
intensely_human@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y
āļø Read as if every word matters āļø
(because thatās how English works)
intensely_human@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 2y
Yeah Iāve got a little gay in me and like a powerful frame, but the super lean, cut bodybuilder look just strikes me as weird. Like a balloon animal made of thin, greasy skin.
affiliate@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y
some do, some donāt
someguy3@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y
Yes.
ceenote@lemmy.world · 42 pts · 2y
So true. No gym I've ever been to has been willing to put in a cat ear machine.
Guest_User@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 2y
You need to find a new gym. The growing process is slow and difficult, but with enough chicken breast and broccoli I too will soon have cat ears others will envy
ceenote@lemmy.world · 23 pts · 2y
I'll start my own gym. With catgirls and a second goddamn bench press rack.
Num10ck@lemmy.world · 31 pts · 2y
if enough singles start mentioning a preference for cat ears on dating websites, the market will adjust.
personally i prefer spock ears.
WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
Quark ears > Spock ears.
intensely_human@lemm.ee · 0 pts · 2y
Skeeter ears > All
nifty@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
Isnāt that kinda elf ears? Or is it a crime against Vulcans to compare their ears as such?
Kowowow@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 2y
They should be more realistic than amine ones like actually on the sides of the head
eestileib@sh.itjust.works · 28 pts · 2y
As a woman who would dearly love a pair of fox ears, if it was possible we would have them.
Also, cat boys are criminally underrated compared to cat girls.
UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 2y
AVincentInSpace@pawb.social · 2 pts · 2y
oh somebody likes their catboys DUMB
shani66@ani.social · 6 pts · 2y
One day it'll happen, it's right up there with a cure to aging on the scale of importance.
Noodle07@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y
I'm still waiting for horns personally, like thicc horns that are part of my skull
MonkderDritte@feddit.de · 1 pts · 2y
Oh, highmates in Rimworld Biology.
Kolanaki@yiffit.net · 25 pts · 2y
What workout routine do I need to follow to become dog?
intensely_human@lemm.ee · 11 pts · 2y
Can you lick your junk yet?
AVincentInSpace@pawb.social · 2 pts · 2y
why did no one tell me that was on the table
i need to go to the gym NOW
Fedizen@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 2y
ok but what if I like my girls with biceps and my dudes with cat ears?
intensely_human@lemm.ee · 14 pts · 2y
Youāre a communist
qyron@sopuli.xyz · 18 pts · 2y
alot
AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 2y
I hope Allie is doing better
Everythingispenguins@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y
This is the only reason I remember to put the space in. Every time I write "alot" I see the alot beast roaming the prairies.
Iron_Lynx@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
Thank you for reminding me that this exists š
gerryflap@feddit.nl · 17 pts · 2y
You can get cat ears in the gym?! Maybe I'll actually start going again
intensely_human@lemm.ee · 16 pts · 2y
After an enormous number of Mandela Effects appeared in my life, my ears are now developing little points like elf ears. Itās weird. Apparently in this universe Iām part elf
tetris11@lemmy.ml · 11 pts · 2y
that's called memory loss and it's a part of growing up.
The elf thing is me. I clip your ears millimeter by millimeter every night.
match@pawb.social · 3 pts · 2y
Oh shit, you're doing it too? We gotta coordinate better
tetris11@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 2y
Okay, you do my left ears and I'll do your right.
Sam_Bass@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 2y
Cat ears are by no means a deal breaker. The money is in the tail
zalgotext@sh.itjust.works · 13 pts · 2y
It really depends on how the tail is attached
Sam_Bass@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y
Peg-mounted is best
MiDaBa@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 2y
Very true otherwise it can't wag. That's tail attachment 101 right there.
UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 2y
Anyone who thinks women want men with big biceps has never watched an episode of Sailor Moon or picked through a copy of Peach Girl.
Kolanaki@yiffit.net · 12 pts · 2y
Women want Tuxedo Mask.
match@pawb.social · 2 pts · 2y
Someone who doesn't do anything, but at least doesn't get in the way?
match@pawb.social · 11 pts · 2y
where can i go to grow cat ears
EvilEyedPanda@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 2y
The Gym, it says so right there
stanleytweedle@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y
Maureen Ponderosa did.
bitwaba@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y
Every time I meet a woman with cat ears online, it's actually a man.
So, things may be more equal than they seem at first glance.
brb@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 2y
Men like
women with cat earsftfy
masquenox@lemmy.world · -8 pts · 2y
Men go to gym to impress other men - period.
Leave women out of it - they really weren't joking when they chose the bears.
AVincentInSpace@pawb.social · 3 pts · 2y
"I speak for all women when I say that men who go to the gym are disgusting"
masquenox@lemmy.world · -2 pts · 2y
Have you managed to impress all the boys yet?
StaySquared@lemmy.world · -10 pts · 2y
This is hilarious.
OP, ever heard of a gym thot? Do you.. even go to the gym? 9 times out of 10, females going to the gym are only focusing on thighs and angus. 1 out of 10 is actually training for sport/competition.
Buddahriffic@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 2y
Neither of those are cat ears.
Though on a less shitposty note, while I like an athletic build on women, I don't get the obsession with thighs and ass. Disproportionately large thighs turn me off whether they are large because of fat or muscle. Though they are often not toned and don't look fat elsewhere, so maybe a lot of them are implants/injections?
Everyone has their preferences, but I gotta wonder if this is based on something other guys actually like or just something marketers have sold to a segment of the population. I wonder the same about breast implants because a lot of those also do more to turn me off than on.
StaySquared@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
Yep, I personally like athletically built women, proportional especially. Olympic lifters, gymnasts, and cross fitters tend to develop well rounded physiques.
chetradley@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
Tells me everything I need to know about you.
StaySquared@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
That I call the opposite sex of males.. females? lol wat.
ichbinjasokreativ@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
Some dudes in the incel scene like to use it to dehumanize women. So of course everybody on lemmy now believes that you're on of those the second they read that word.
StaySquared@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
lol.. Thanks for making me aware. Didn't realize simple vocabulary words had other meanings attached to them.
Zetta@mander.xyz · 3 pts · 2y
The proper, politically correct term is femoid nowadays. Heard it on 4chan
StaySquared@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 2y
Now this term I've heard incels use.
Zetta@mander.xyz · 1 pts · 2y
Shardikprime@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
Angus must be sugon's cousin
Dagwood222@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y
Just for my edification, what were you trying to type?
tetris11@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 2y
If you've never seen an woman's Angus at the gym, strolling through the aisles of the local Netto to clown the cheapest brew known to man... then I don't know what to tell you
Dagwood222@lemm.ee · 2 pts · 2y
The original guy didn't capitalize. Now it all makes sense...
StaySquared@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
booty.
Dagwood222@lemm.ee · 2 pts · 2y
Guess 'angus' is a local slang I am unaware of.
I'll casually drop it in conversation and see what happens.
Thanks for responding.
StaySquared@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 2y
lmao you will get a laugh. It's somewhat old skool internet slang, from like 2000-2015.
Dagwood222@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y
Fo' shizzle?
Shardikprime@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 2y
don't change the dizzle