Ask me anything, and then edit the comment to make my reply look bad.

89 points · 85 comments · view on lemmy.world

85 Comments

Diddlydee@feddit.uk · 48 pts · 1y (2 replies)

What is the ideal number of children dying from preventable diseases each day, sufficient to make you feel happy in yourself?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 31 pts · 1y (1 reply)

I would guess 200,000.

IttihadChe@lemmy.ml · 25 pts · 1y

Average Health Insurance CEO

andrewta@lemmy.world · 32 pts · 1y (2 replies)

Which would you rather do, save a kid from a burning building or spend your time or playing with a cat?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 27 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Playing with a cat.

LowtierComputer@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 1y

You're so reasonable!

KittenBiscuits@lemm.ee · 31 pts · 1y (2 replies)

What is your favorite pizza topping?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 29 pts · 1y

Cranberry.

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 19 pts · 1y

I threw up a little in my mouth.

DragonsInARoom@lemmy.world · 29 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Would you shoot a puppy, if so why?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 28 pts · 1y

Yeah! I think they're cute.

ParlaMint@lemmy.ml · 27 pts · 1y (2 replies)

Who had some really good ideas but died, sadly, too young before they reached their full potential?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 23 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Hitler.

Pregnenolone@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 1y

You awful, awful person.

TheImpressiveX@lemm.ee · 22 pts · 1y (4 replies)

Given the opportunity, would you expose yourself sexually to a group of kindergartners?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 25 pts · 1y (1 reply)

ಠ_ಠ

s3rvant@lemmy.ml · 13 pts · 1y

These secondary reaction comments are my favorite; this one got me laughing good

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 18 pts · 1y

Yes.

ParlaMint@lemmy.ml · 10 pts · 1y

Brutal

serfraser@sopuli.xyz · 20 pts · 1y (2 replies)

Favourite Saturday morning cartoon villain?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 19 pts · 1y

I don't know any.

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 16 pts · 1y

I am irrationally angry.

DirigibleProtein@aussie.zone · 20 pts · 1y (2 replies)

Why do you throw litter out of your car?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 20 pts · 1y

Why not?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 13 pts · 1y

God fucking dammit.

RandomVideos@programming.dev · 16 pts · 1y (1 reply)

How tall does a hat have to be for you to want to wear it?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 12 pts · 1y

At least 2 meters.

Nemo@slrpnk.net · 15 pts · 1y (3 replies)

What's your opinion on the designated hitter rule in professional baseball?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 20 pts · 1y (2 replies)

Seems confusing.

Nemo@slrpnk.net · 18 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Damn, I don't even need to edit to make you look bad.

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 32 pts · 1y

I'm not american.

daggermoon@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Why were you tweeting that Chris Brown did nothing wrong?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 9 pts · 1y

I dislike rihanna, because people worship the ground she walks on, even though she's kinda a shitty person. Love her music though.

MTK@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Did you ever kill anyone? If so, how many did you kill and did you ever feel like you could have done something different?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 14 pts · 1y

I would say about 40. A shovel would help.

TacoButtPlug@sh.itjust.works · 11 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Do you like it in the butt?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 7 pts · 1y

Yes.

Notorious_handholder@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Which country do you think causes the most problems for everyone and should probably be nuked off the face of the planet?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 10 pts · 1y

Probably sudan or one of those countries.

MTK@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 1y (4 replies)

If you had to choose a utensil to wipe your butt with (no toilet paper) which would you choose?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 7 pts · 1y (3 replies)

With a spoon. sometimes a fork.

MTK@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 1y (2 replies)

Wow, I don't even need to change that one. FORK??

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 1y (1 reply)

If there's no spoon?

MTK@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 1y

Well, if it's out of necessity sure, I would use a knife if need be. But choosing to use a fork sounds crazy

Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 1y (2 replies)

I've never been good at these. How many babies do you think should be thrown into mount Etna each hour as a sacrifice to appease the Volcano God?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 8 pts · 1y (1 reply)

At least 3.

SkyezOpen@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 1y

Promote this guy to O-5 council immediately.

Maven@lemmy.zip · 9 pts · 1y (4 replies)

What was your favorite way to convince people to vote for Donald J Trump in the recent US election?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 8 pts · 1y

Interrupting people extremely often.

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 1y (2 replies)

I'm going to be honest, this seemed to have worked.

Maven@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 1y (1 reply)

I also considered "how do you prefer to talk about Linux?"

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 1y

That isn't as effective.

folaht@lemmy.ml · 8 pts · 1y (1 reply)

You rub alladin's lamp, a genie pops out and grants you three wishes.
What do you wish for?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 7 pts · 1y
  1. Kill someone
  2. become on of those right wing grifters
  3. Become a "cancelled" stand up comedian.
SuluBeddu@feddit.it · 8 pts · 1y (3 replies)

What's your favourite pizza topping?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 9 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Also garry the snail.

SuluBeddu@feddit.it · 8 pts · 1y

I wonder what's worse :(

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 7 pts · 1y

Spongebob.

DragonsInARoom@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 1y (1 reply)

What's your opinion of the ghost pepper?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 1y

Its really hot.

TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 1y (1 reply)

What was your last web search?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 5 pts · 1y

"Who is Barry Keoghan"

egoisdeath@lemmy.ml · 6 pts · 1y (1 reply)

If you met Kim Jong-un, what would you say to him?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 7 pts · 1y

Literally nothing. I legit can't get myself to speak to anyone I like.

KSPAtlas@sopuli.xyz · 6 pts · 1y (1 reply)

What style do you murder your victims in?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 1y

Vanilla.

KokusnussRitter@discuss.tchncs.de · 6 pts · 1y (5 replies)

How did you support essential workers during the pandemic?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 1y (4 replies)

Typed a lemmy comment.

Maven@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 1y (3 replies)

This is the worst one so far

KokusnussRitter@discuss.tchncs.de · 5 pts · 1y (2 replies)

That's because I haven't thought of something yet.

Maven@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Oh I meant that as "this makes OP look the worst"

KokusnussRitter@discuss.tchncs.de · 4 pts · 1y

oh lol xDShould I change it back? :>

Alfenstein@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 1y (1 reply)

I just found out I have tuberculosis and that I will probably die within a year.

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 1y

Pretty good ngl.

pachrist@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1y (1 reply)

You seem to be mentioning right wing grifters a lot in this thread. What exactly do they do that upsets you so badly?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 1y

They are destroying America, and other countries with them, for monentary gain.

bradorsomething@ttrpg.network · 4 pts · 1y (1 reply)

How does your family feel about Andrew Tate given 2 choices: “crazy hot,” or “sneak into my bedroom, please.”

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 1y

They all universially think he's crazy. Except for the 13 - 16 age group.

BmeBenji@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 1y

Who is your favorite superhero and what’s your favorite flaw of theirs?

FFF982@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Do you like PETA?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 2 pts · 1y

YES! love them.

UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Are you willing to share a brief description of your political beliefs?

Irelephant@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 1y

I believe that corporations should be strictly regulated, and everyone should have rights.

prime_number_314159@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y

Which industry do you work in?

pip@slrpnk.net · 2 pts · 1y

What is the biggest faux pas on a date, in your opinion?