My wife can sit on the toilet for 45 minutes. I don't get it. I want to get on and off that thing as quickly as possible. Why do you want to hover over poo?
Chia seeds. I sprinkle that shit on everything I can. Salad, cereal, yogurt, smoothies. It’s extremely high in fiber. But be careful, too much fiber can be a bad thing. Make sure to keep up your water intake!
I'd say it's more of a revelation to me that sitting on the toilet seat itself for long periods causes hemorrhoids, than hemorrhoids being common in general.
I've been there for an hour a couple of times, I've never had it so I would never notice lol. I guess it's time to avoid it altogether.
There, said it loud and clear so everyone can hear. Doom scroll all you want but give it a flush first please, no need to stink up the bathroom with your nasty shit stew marinating the whole time. I don't understand why people don't know this.
40 Comments
ramenshaman@lemmy.world · 49 pts · 2y
Literal shitpost.
ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website · 14 pts · 2y
It felt appropriate to stay on theme here.
Shady_Shiroe@lemm.ee · 31 pts · 2y
I would say 45 minutes of scrolling if lemmy.world wasn't constantly under DDOS attacks
TheGoldenGod@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 2y
So true… 😣 It’s like they think it’s the main server for the entire thing.
raltoid@lemmy.world · 27 pts · 2y
I was shocked when I found out how common external/bleeding hemorrhoids can be(Almost 3/4 adults will have them from time to time).
Then it all clicked when I realized people sit on the toilet for 15min+, which is a major contributor to that condition.
ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website · 13 pts · 2y
When I get hemorrhoids, it’s not from sitting for long periods. It’s due to my need for a poop bat’leth. I take Klingon sized poops.
Agent641@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
Uppercase poops
ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website · 5 pts · 2y
Correct, these are most certainly, POOPS. I have Toto toilets that I bought to ensure I can flush without fear of it’s returning from Sto-vo-kor.
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
My wife can sit on the toilet for 45 minutes. I don't get it. I want to get on and off that thing as quickly as possible. Why do you want to hover over poo?
Agent641@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y
Not all of us have a bowel that is cooperative and timely. For some of us it is always a pitched battle of wills, a violent class struggle.
danny@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 2y
Because it doesn’t all happen at once
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
Yeah, but 45 minutes? Take a break and come back or something.
norawibb@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 2y
i blame lack of bidets
nonfuinoncuro@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 2y
QuazarOmega@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
Damn, respect for that
shitstuff.Do you have some suggestions for fiber rich foods too?
RadicalCandour@startrek.website · 4 pts · 2y
Chia seeds. I sprinkle that shit on everything I can. Salad, cereal, yogurt, smoothies. It’s extremely high in fiber. But be careful, too much fiber can be a bad thing. Make sure to keep up your water intake!
QuazarOmega@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
Thanks for tips ! I'll be needing that
norawibb@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 2y
eating a better diet is probably better than metamucil
nonfuinoncuro@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y
norawibb@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 2y
Pfff what? I clear 30g easy. Half a box of whole wheat spaghetti is 20g. A cup of dry pinto beans is 48g.
nonfuinoncuro@lemm.ee · 0 pts · 2y
norawibb@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 2y
Not smoking anything...
akippnn@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
I'd say it's more of a revelation to me that sitting on the toilet seat itself for long periods causes hemorrhoids, than hemorrhoids being common in general.
I've been there for an hour a couple of times, I've never had it so I would never notice lol. I guess it's time to avoid it altogether.
Faustus@feddit.ch · 12 pts · 2y
15 minutes? Amateur.
RagingRobot@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y
Do your legs ever fall asleep
Faustus@feddit.ch · 11 pts · 2y
Nope. Years of experience hiding in the bathroom from my kids.
RadicalCandour@startrek.website · 2 pts · 2y
A squatty potty really helps in the department of prolonged toilet sitting.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 2y
You know a courtesy flush will take care of the aroma.
ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website · 6 pts · 2y
But then how will other Klingons smell what I’m cooking?
RedditWanderer@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y
Now do your leg that has long fell asleep
ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website · 2 pts · 2y
A Klingon doesn’t skip leg day’s.
hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 8 pts · 2y
You're supposed to hold it for 3 days, not 15 minutes!
ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website · 5 pts · 2y
But, that’s how they become pine cone shaped.
Justly0250@lemdro.id · 2 pts · 2y
Rookie numbers.
thegreatgarbo@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y
Thank you for a legit belly laugh.
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
Sadly, that's work for me. "You can go to the bathroom, but you have to finish these three orders first." Thanks, brain. Fuck you.
danny@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 2y
Me rn (or my poop more accurately)
mojo@lemm.ee · 5 pts · 2y
this made me laugh way too much lmao
solstice@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y
COURTESY FLUSH
There, said it loud and clear so everyone can hear. Doom scroll all you want but give it a flush first please, no need to stink up the bathroom with your nasty shit stew marinating the whole time. I don't understand why people don't know this.
victron@programming.dev · 1 pts · 2y
Thank you for giving it a name, fellow courtesy flusher.
lord_ryvan@ttrpg.network · 3 pts · 2y
I should leave, damn
ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website · 5 pts · 2y
Or you could stay, there’s no shame friend.
fne8w2ah@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
That reminds me of the early days of R*ddit.