I feel like the greatest risk of weed is the inability to check for it in a breathalyzer, and that the world run on cars. Drugs, like alcohol and weed, makes you a worse driver, but there is no way to check if a person is under the influence.
Protip: if you know Satan's Eyeball is coming, you can, uh, line the exit with a barrier ointment called Ilex. Just be careful not to glue it shut (petroleum jelly can help). If you are too late, there's this great soothing ointment called calmoseptine (it's desitin with a very mild topical analgesic in it) but it's pink and stainy so wear a pantyliner with it unless you really don't like that pair.
Well you see, I had started out toasting pieces of bread for it, but at some point I decided that was taking too long and just started eating it straight LMAO
Okay, It's been another five minutes and now I'm even more hungry than I was five minutes ago so now is the time you have to rise and bring forth your squirrel to the... bagel shop. Where I can get the cream cheese the creamy creamy cheese, cheesy cheesy cream.
36 Comments
NeedyPlatter@lemmy.ca · 30 pts · 1y
The real dangers of marijuana /j
littlebigendian@lemmy.zip · 18 pts · 1y
1/1 chance of eating block of cream checheese 1/10000 chance of crippling psychosis
Kolanaki@pawb.social · 13 pts · 1y
Hehe checheese.
outhouseperilous@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 5 pts · 1y
This is real. Id be so much less fat if i didn't.
defaultusername@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 4 pts · 1y
This, but unironically.
HappyFrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 1y
I feel like the greatest risk of weed is the inability to check for it in a breathalyzer, and that the world run on cars. Drugs, like alcohol and weed, makes you a worse driver, but there is no way to check if a person is under the influence.
Washedupcynic@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 1y
🤣
toomanypancakes@piefed.world · 20 pts · 1y
Try to compensate with several bagels
halcyoncmdr@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y
More like 2 with the proper amount of cream cheese.
omgboom@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 9 pts · 1y
Bro dump some salsa over that and eat it with tortilla chips
cm0002@piefed.world · 5 pts · 1y
Aw fuck, that sounds so good, but alas, I have no salsa :(
TheOakTree@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 1y
No hot sauce in the house? Blasphemy!
robdor@lemmynsfw.com · 9 pts · 1y
RIP toilet
Matticus@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1y
And a sad bum.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1y
Protip: if you know Satan's Eyeball is coming, you can, uh, line the exit with a barrier ointment called Ilex. Just be careful not to glue it shut (petroleum jelly can help). If you are too late, there's this great soothing ointment called calmoseptine (it's desitin with a very mild topical analgesic in it) but it's pink and stainy so wear a pantyliner with it unless you really don't like that pair.
Source: former member of the nuclear taco club
Dasus@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y
Mine eased when I went off gluten and dairy. But that wouldn't defeat the purpose of this post, seeing as its OP having eaten a bunch of dairy.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y
oh i thought we were talking lactose intolerance induced
but you know
Dasus@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y
Yes, lactose intolerance causes more diarrhoea, just like you've pictured there, whereas my gif represents Steatorrhea
FerretyFever0@fedia.io · 8 pts · 1y
Embrace it. Ngl, I do this sober lmao. Not by itself though.
cm0002@piefed.world · 6 pts · 1y
Well you see, I had started out toasting pieces of bread for it, but at some point I decided that was taking too long and just started eating it straight LMAO
MacNCheezus@lemmy.today · 7 pts · 1y
This too shall pass 😌
Jojowski@sopuli.xyz · 1 pts · 1y
As will gas
Dasus@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 1y
Quickly, eat a massive bowl of soup and your body will just think you had a huge portion of chowder so you don't need to feel ashamed.
A_Union_of_Kobolds@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y
No help is needed, shits delicious
StarvingMartist@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 1y
What a waste of cream cheese. Here use it in this instead
OozingPositron@feddit.cl · 6 pts · 1y
>Checks ingredients
>No buffalo
StarvingMartist@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 1y
True, the one fatal flaw
idiomaddict@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y
It’s just the standard chicken pasta recipe for buffalos.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1y
I may or may not have gotten way too into trees and bike repair and thought you were measuring your cheese with precision calipers
YoSoySnekBoi@kbin.earth · 3 pts · 1y
Gotta check for shrinkflation
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y
i just weigh it after i eat it
Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net · 4 pts · 1y
thisbenzingring@lemmy.sdf.org · 3 pts · 1y
I hope it was with chips and spicy salsa... as a lactose intolerante, that is what I always miss the most about cream cheese
fubarx@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y
Whatever you've heard about arterial maggots is NOT true.
prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 1y
You'll be fine in a day or so, but get ready for some extreme bubble gut
Washedupcynic@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 1y
I'm proud of you!
Blackout@fedia.io · 1 pts · 1y