I never felt the urge to send a pic myself like that. I even remember a girl sending me a bunch of nude photos and then messaging asking me for some of myself. I pretended I didn't understand what she meant and played dumb. She still got to see it and all, but still.
My cat Lucy likes to catch mice outside, bring them inside to show me so she can show off her skills, and then accidentally let them go so it falls on me to handle them.
And I mean...it sucks when we're talking actual mice but like...the other thing... I really wouldn't complain at this point if they were to...fall on me to handle 😂
'Cause tbh, I haven't seen one of those hanging out in my bedroom for way too long. And if the cat could just catch them and bring them to me? I could delete all the apps. Dream come true.
I feel now like my language choices before...perhaps they made it sound like I wanted my cat to bring me just the dicks, no man attached to them, haha, but no. It was just a synecdoche, having the man be represented by a dick, lol. Like how people call their car their "wheels" though wheels aren't the whole car. Or more directly how men might say they're going out to try and get some p***y, when they mean an entire woman.
And of course men have other parts to themselves thatcI appreciate. Take legs for example- pants require legs so they can be worn, and pants are where the wallet pocket hangs! Legs are also essential for getting them to leave my place when we're done. 😎 (So joking, I promise. I'm not really like this at all. 😂).
All this time in life wasted though, only ever engaging with the permanently-attached-to-a-peron ones of these (silicone not withstanding). I just didn't know there was another option!
Could you imagine something like this scene playing out though: say a guy shells out for a cool new surgery to make his penis detachable. Its a success! He goes to see his girl later, when it's all healed up. Soon after the girl's upset and starts yelling at this guy she's dating, because he was getting a bit too handsy and she was really trying to have a serious conversation with him.
She's like, "COULD YOU PLEASE, like just this once, STOP THINKING WITH YOUR GODDAMN F-ING DICK so we can actually TALK about what's going on with us?".
Then to her surprise he's just like, "sure", then he reaches down into his shorts, detaches his detachable penis, and pulls it out for her to see it for first time detached. You know, the pull out method.😂
I'm proud of my cat when he brings a prey, a mouse or a leaf, and I pet him. If he doesn't eat the mouse, I absolutely touch it because I don't let dead mouse in the kitchen. I won't do that for a dick. Please don't put your dick on my kitchen floor.
It’s not really that far removed from flashing someone if it’s unsolicited. And - even as a guy who loves dick pics - no one is going to be enticed by a poorly lit picture of your dick held up next to a monster can in your bathroom. (What the hell is with the “over the toilet shot”? So gross.)
I bring this up every time someone says this but the reason guys do it is because it works. Not all the time but enough times that they'll keep doing it.
cats bring you mice because they think you are just a big cat but you're a shit hunter. so they kinda care, in a somewhat disgusting way. In contrast people who send dick pics care mostly about themselves and are disgusting.
they are however actually quite social animals and they're clearly bringing it to you, so it's a good bet they want to share, not because they think you're incompetent but just because family helps each other.
"hello human i love you very much, let's eat this mole together :3"
Also, cat behavior can vary wildly from one to another. I had a cat that hunted and ate his kills. Cleared my mice-in-the-walls problems! He never left me a present.
Had another cat that not only showed zero hunting behavior or play, she showed none of the typical behavior we joke about.
Also, none of my cats have ever brought me a present.
It's been 35-years back, but after 4 professors from different disciplines recommended Desmond Morris' books, I dived in. He believed that cats and dogs saw us as cats and dogs, just a different sort. I may be misremembering, but he did write about that idea in relation to dogs.
So that's no longer the thinking? I never felt that my cats viewed me as one of them, but my dogs seemed to. But that's probably me anthropomorphizing.
i think it might be that dogs view themselves as one of us, we did specifically breed them to be more like humans after all and they're constantly surrounded by us.
Obviously they recognize there's some difference though, since they clearly treat other dogs differently. They don't really expect a human to go running around with them, but another dog is expected to share in the zoomies.
38 Comments
Grimy@lemmy.world · 26 pts · 305d
I never felt the urge to send a pic myself like that. I even remember a girl sending me a bunch of nude photos and then messaging asking me for some of myself. I pretended I didn't understand what she meant and played dumb. She still got to see it and all, but still.
dylanmorgan@slrpnk.net · 16 pts · 304d
Same. On the handful of occasions I’ve been asked I still don’t want to do it.
shalafi@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 304d
Huh. I've only been asked once. Figured it was a bit strange, gladly sent it anyway, not insecure on that issue.
Maybe it's an age thing? I'm GenX and nearly ever lover I've had is as well.
porksnort@slrpnk.net · 19 pts · 304d
None of the women I discuss ‘making it’ with want these sorts of pictures.
All of the men do, badly.
Dick pics are for dudes.
shalafi@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 304d
Had dozens of lovers and only one actually asked for a dick pic. Weird, but I sent it. Got laid anyway!
dylanmorgan@slrpnk.net · 17 pts · 304d
Use tongs to remove the offending item from the area.
cows_are_underrated@feddit.org · 12 pts · 304d
Save their dick picks to have a collection at hand so when someone sends you one you can reply with one too.
Also report these fuckers to the police.
Atkat@leminal.space · 8 pts · 304d
My cat Lucy likes to catch mice outside, bring them inside to show me so she can show off her skills, and then accidentally let them go so it falls on me to handle them.
And I mean...it sucks when we're talking actual mice but like...the other thing... I really wouldn't complain at this point if they were to...fall on me to handle 😂
'Cause tbh, I haven't seen one of those hanging out in my bedroom for way too long. And if the cat could just catch them and bring them to me? I could delete all the apps. Dream come true.
tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 304d
King Missile has entered the chat
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=byDiILrNbM4
Atkat@leminal.space · 4 pts · 304d
Hahaha amazing!!!
I feel now like my language choices before...perhaps they made it sound like I wanted my cat to bring me just the dicks, no man attached to them, haha, but no. It was just a synecdoche, having the man be represented by a dick, lol. Like how people call their car their "wheels" though wheels aren't the whole car. Or more directly how men might say they're going out to try and get some p***y, when they mean an entire woman.
And of course men have other parts to themselves thatcI appreciate. Take legs for example- pants require legs so they can be worn, and pants are where the wallet pocket hangs! Legs are also essential for getting them to leave my place when we're done. 😎 (So joking, I promise. I'm not really like this at all. 😂).
All this time in life wasted though, only ever engaging with the permanently-attached-to-a-peron ones of these (silicone not withstanding). I just didn't know there was another option!
Could you imagine something like this scene playing out though: say a guy shells out for a cool new surgery to make his penis detachable. Its a success! He goes to see his girl later, when it's all healed up. Soon after the girl's upset and starts yelling at this guy she's dating, because he was getting a bit too handsy and she was really trying to have a serious conversation with him.
She's like, "COULD YOU PLEASE, like just this once, STOP THINKING WITH YOUR GODDAMN F-ING DICK so we can actually TALK about what's going on with us?".
Then to her surprise he's just like, "sure", then he reaches down into his shorts, detaches his detachable penis, and pulls it out for her to see it for first time detached. You know, the pull out method.😂
Would she be stoked or horrified I wonder?
tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 304d
Ah, a fellow lover of metonymy. I hope your cat brings you all the dicks attached to people that you could ever hope for.
truite@jlai.lu · 7 pts · 304d
I'm proud of my cat when he brings a prey, a mouse or a leaf, and I pet him. If he doesn't eat the mouse, I absolutely touch it because I don't let dead mouse in the kitchen. I won't do that for a dick. Please don't put your dick on my kitchen floor.
freeusething@lemmynsfw.com · 7 pts · 304d
It’s not really that far removed from flashing someone if it’s unsolicited. And - even as a guy who loves dick pics - no one is going to be enticed by a poorly lit picture of your dick held up next to a monster can in your bathroom. (What the hell is with the “over the toilet shot”? So gross.)
tias@discuss.tchncs.de · 9 pts · 304d
So enlist a professional photographer before sending dick pics. Gotcha.
freeusething@lemmynsfw.com · 4 pts · 304d
I wrote out a guide a while back which people seemed to appreciate.
Just put a little effort in it. If you want your dick to be admired, frame it in a way worth admiring.
Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 304d
just apply food photography techniques
tias@discuss.tchncs.de · 3 pts · 304d
So basically the goal is to successfully convince people to "eat my dick"
stupidcasey@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 304d
Just gonna leave this here:
rdri@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 304d
Unfortunately that seems to be an AI slop.
ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 304d
I bring this up every time someone says this but the reason guys do it is because it works. Not all the time but enough times that they'll keep doing it.
WhisperingEye@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 304d
That is just sad, from both sides 😅
aeronmelon@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 305d
And you just ruined what was otherwise a very relaxing afternoon.
CurlyWurlies4All@slrpnk.net · 6 pts · 304d
Why do i never receive dick pics? Do you guys not want validation from me?
Gonzako@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 304d
We can fix that, tho, we'd have to trade fototeta for fotopeta
Masterkraft0r@discuss.tchncs.de · 5 pts · 304d
Well actually
cats bring you mice because they think you are just a big cat but you're a shit hunter. so they kinda care, in a somewhat disgusting way. In contrast people who send dick pics care mostly about themselves and are disgusting.
kadu@scribe.disroot.org · 9 pts · 304d
That's a myth and a bizarre misinterpretation of how ethology studies work. It's incredibly bothersome to still see this being repeated around.
I get it sounds cute and the media loved posting about it, but no, your cat does not see you as a big awkward cat that can't hunt.
axexrx@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 304d
My cat stopped bringing me his kills pretty immediately after he saw me catch a rabbit barehabded that he was going for to remove it from the yard.
kadu@scribe.disroot.org · 7 pts · 304d
My cat likes to shutdown my computer
Dozzi92@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 304d
Yeah, it's killing your mouse.
Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de · 4 pts · 304d
they are however actually quite social animals and they're clearly bringing it to you, so it's a good bet they want to share, not because they think you're incompetent but just because family helps each other.
"hello human i love you very much, let's eat this mole together :3"
kadu@scribe.disroot.org · 2 pts · 304d
Absolutely, you're right.
shalafi@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 304d
Also, cat behavior can vary wildly from one to another. I had a cat that hunted and ate his kills. Cleared my mice-in-the-walls problems! He never left me a present.
Had another cat that not only showed zero hunting behavior or play, she showed none of the typical behavior we joke about.
Also, none of my cats have ever brought me a present.
It's been 35-years back, but after 4 professors from different disciplines recommended Desmond Morris' books, I dived in. He believed that cats and dogs saw us as cats and dogs, just a different sort. I may be misremembering, but he did write about that idea in relation to dogs.
So that's no longer the thinking? I never felt that my cats viewed me as one of them, but my dogs seemed to. But that's probably me anthropomorphizing.
Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de · 2 pts · 304d
i think it might be that dogs view themselves as one of us, we did specifically breed them to be more like humans after all and they're constantly surrounded by us.
Obviously they recognize there's some difference though, since they clearly treat other dogs differently. They don't really expect a human to go running around with them, but another dog is expected to share in the zoomies.
Dreaming_Novaling@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 304d
Okay, but at least cat cares about you and wants to meet your needs. What does an unsolicited dick pic do for anybody?
Dick pic is selfish, kitty is not
kadu@scribe.disroot.org · 2 pts · 304d
That I can agree with
Jankatarch@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 304d
Cats still have a cute, innocent reason for doing so.
MissJinx@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 304d
I've never kissed any guy that sent me a dick pic
pipe01@programming.dev · 3 pts · 303d
Yet
falseWhite@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 302d