Gender expectations for afabs in high school are unhinged. A “friend” once made me feel bad because I carried fat in my breasts, just because she was insecure about having smaller breasts than I did. I didn’t even want them at all, but somehow I got shamed for them not being good enough.
The most baffling part is that I didn’t get my period until 17, so at no point during high school did I even have a bust for her to get jealous about, I was just a little chubby.
I was also regularly called a man for not plucking my pretty tame eyebrows and getting fake tans. I’d say that they might have been picking up on my egg status, but I’m pretty certain that’s not the case. Man, I hated high school.
(Sorry for the stilted terminology- I don’t feel comfortable using any word to describe 17 year olds’ chests, it turns out.)
Don't worry, perfectly reasonable thing to be uncomfortable with imo.
It's "funny" that very thought about gender expectations is what made my own gender crisis in high school so difficult to navigate. I was only aware of the full Binary transition options and so being amab I thought the only way to be "not boy" was to "be girl" instead, I didn't know nonbinary was even a thing someone could be until my now wife heard my story over a decade later and introduced me to it.
So being the imaginative little doofus I am, I set about imagining my life from that perspective. Trying to see if I'd be happier as a girl. But what I kept coming back to was that as much as being a boy felt wrong, as much as I hated the gender expectations put on me for being born in that box, and as much as I wished that I had been born different because of things like being bullied for showing emotion or being seen as a predator for wanting to work with children deep down, all I'd be doing is trading one set of expectations I hated for a different set of expectations I hated in different ways.
I didn't learn until much later that a lot of that had to do with subconsciously being very uncomfortable as an asexual person with the amount of overt sexualization women face. Which makes a ton of sense because one of the big "male" expectations I hated was being constantly made to feel like I was broken because I wasn't looking to sleep with anything vaguely female shaped with a pulse.
29 Comments
DagwoodIII@piefed.social · 48 pts · 227d
Horse?
Or is that covered by 'wee English fella?'
irelephant@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 22 pts · 227d
Depends on whether the horse is english
DagwoodIII@piefed.social · 23 pts · 227d
All horses are English.
I mean, look at the teeth!
darkdemize@sh.itjust.works · 11 pts · 227d
I seem to recall something about not looking horses in the mouth.
CMDR_Horn@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 227d
That's only gifted horses. You can look in the dumb ones all day.
baguettefish@discuss.tchncs.de · 6 pts · 227d
only applies to gift horses. they have a contract. it's in the contract.
Holytimes@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 227d
You arnt ment to look a gift horse in the mouth tho!
DagwoodIII@piefed.social · 2 pts · 227d
The horse isn't a gift, in fact I'm doing you a favor by taking it.
Gathorall@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 227d
Likely to also land on feral or horny.
Denjin@feddit.uk · 5 pts · 227d
Or often both
python@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 226d
Now that you mention it, I have never encountered a lesbian horse girl somehow. They're all into art instead
kerrigan778@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 41 pts · 227d
I'm sure the people posting this originally are teenage girls but... I'm honestly past the age where I wanna hear about teens being horny in any way
irelephant@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 17 pts · 227d
This is a reference to Derry girls, a tv show.
kerrigan778@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 15 pts · 227d
pirc_lover@feddit.uk · 7 pts · 226d
GRANNY! I SAID, IT’S A REFERENCE TO A POPULAR TV SHOW!
kerrigan778@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 7 pts · 226d
Television you say?
FerretyFever0@fedia.io · 4 pts · 226d
Is that the radio machine with the moving pictures?
Zorsith@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 10 pts · 227d
Even college students look like (older) children to me, and I'm still a couple years off from 30.
DawnOfTime@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 18 pts · 227d
I need to rewatch derry girls so hard
Fleur_@aussie.zone · 11 pts · 227d
What are the other 4 types?
PaupersSerenade@startrek.website · 10 pts · 227d
I fell under ‘wee English fella’. I was the de facto stage manager at my high school and all the crew called me grandpa or gramps ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
There was also that time I wore a turtleneck/blazer combo so even the cast was calling me Captain haha
TotallynotJessica@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 7 pts · 227d
I see no reason why these are mutually exclusive
irelephant@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 7 pts · 227d
I don't think it said they were mutually exclusive.
^this^ ^tweet^ ^is^ ^a^ ^Derry^ ^girls^ ^reference^ ^btw^
applebusch@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 7 pts · 227d
You forgot egg
Walk_blesseD@piefed.blahaj.zone · 18 pts · 227d
That's the wee english fella
Macchi_the_Slime@piefed.blahaj.zone · 9 pts · 227d
Depending on how far in the closet they are, might also be covered under Lesbian.
idiomaddict@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 227d
Or feral, tbh.
Gender expectations for afabs in high school are unhinged. A “friend” once made me feel bad because I carried fat in my breasts, just because she was insecure about having smaller breasts than I did. I didn’t even want them at all, but somehow I got shamed for them not being good enough.
The most baffling part is that I didn’t get my period until 17, so at no point during high school did I even have a bust for her to get jealous about, I was just a little chubby.
I was also regularly called a man for not plucking my pretty tame eyebrows and getting fake tans. I’d say that they might have been picking up on my egg status, but I’m pretty certain that’s not the case. Man, I hated high school.
(Sorry for the stilted terminology- I don’t feel comfortable using any word to describe 17 year olds’ chests, it turns out.)
Macchi_the_Slime@piefed.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 226d
Don't worry, perfectly reasonable thing to be uncomfortable with imo.
It's "funny" that very thought about gender expectations is what made my own gender crisis in high school so difficult to navigate. I was only aware of the full Binary transition options and so being amab I thought the only way to be "not boy" was to "be girl" instead, I didn't know nonbinary was even a thing someone could be until my now wife heard my story over a decade later and introduced me to it.
So being the imaginative little doofus I am, I set about imagining my life from that perspective. Trying to see if I'd be happier as a girl. But what I kept coming back to was that as much as being a boy felt wrong, as much as I hated the gender expectations put on me for being born in that box, and as much as I wished that I had been born different because of things like being bullied for showing emotion or being seen as a predator for wanting to work with children deep down, all I'd be doing is trading one set of expectations I hated for a different set of expectations I hated in different ways.
I didn't learn until much later that a lot of that had to do with subconsciously being very uncomfortable as an asexual person with the amount of overt sexualization women face. Which makes a ton of sense because one of the big "male" expectations I hated was being constantly made to feel like I was broken because I wasn't looking to sleep with anything vaguely female shaped with a pulse.
Sorry, I'm rambling... uh... gender expectations are bullshit? Yeah... yeah that.
Walk_blesseD@piefed.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 226d
Ok but fr, that Ukrainian girl was totally gonna boyremove James and you can't change my mind.