I had a flatmate at one time who walked past my room, sick his head in the doorway
::: spoiler and said
"Your mother just rang, she said she wishes she aborted you in the 2nd trimester"
:::
My favourite dead mamma joke was when a friend said "I fucked your mom last night." I replied "How? Phone sex through a Ouija board?" Then making the hand gesture pointing to the letter "O" over and over again.
My mom was an abusive piece of shit who I haven't seen or talked to since I was 18. I'm now 47, and I have no problem with people making fun of her. Thanks to therapy I don't hate her anymore, but that does not mean that I love her.
41 Comments
Berengaria_of_Navarre@lemmy.world · 43 pts · 184d
Your mum's so slow, it took her 9 months to make a joke.
NichEherVielleicht@feddit.org · 16 pts · 184d
That's s good one
flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 184d
Wow, that's brutal!
I had a flatmate at one time who walked past my room, sick his head in the doorway ::: spoiler and said "Your mother just rang, she said she wishes she aborted you in the 2nd trimester" :::
DmMacniel@feddit.org · 30 pts · 184d
But where is Saddam?
SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 11 pts · 184d
What I came to ask. He should be here.
bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de · 23 pts · 184d
YO MOMMA is so fat, we're seriously concerned for her health.
MacaqueAndCheese@lemmy.ca · 15 pts · 184d
Your mommy is so big that the big store called and said "no that's too big".
baguettefish@discuss.tchncs.de · 4 pts · 184d
trump called her very bigly tremendous
MacaqueAndCheese@lemmy.ca · 4 pts · 184d
I've never heard of this trump fellow
Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 184d
Trump wasn't interested in her. Too old
Zagam@piefed.social · 13 pts · 184d
Yo momma so old her social security number is 1.
DarkFuture@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 184d
One of the greatest tragedies of life is getting to an age where you have to stop the mom jokes IRL because people's moms start IRL dying.
NichEherVielleicht@feddit.org · 10 pts · 184d
The mom jokes have nothing to do with the irl mums. My mum died 20 years ago, a good mum joke doesn't.
Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca · 9 pts · 184d
My favourite dead mamma joke was when a friend said "I fucked your mom last night." I replied "How? Phone sex through a Ouija board?" Then making the hand gesture pointing to the letter "O" over and over again.
Etterra@discuss.online · 4 pts · 184d
My mom was an abusive piece of shit who I haven't seen or talked to since I was 18. I'm now 47, and I have no problem with people making fun of her. Thanks to therapy I don't hate her anymore, but that does not mean that I love her.
knobbysideup@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 184d
Mom died 2 years ago. Still get these at work. I take no offense.
eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 8 pts · 184d
That is an unbelievably sexy woman in the pic, damn.
Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca · 4 pts · 184d
OP's mamma is phat.
eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 184d
Gimme a bellybutton I can build a shed in
potatoboy@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 183d
Sexy, but fat
eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 183d
Sexy and fat
It's not healthy but it looks good
ordnance_qf_17_pounder@reddthat.com · 6 pts · 184d
"You like thicc girls?"
"Yes"
"How thicc?"
" "
bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de · 5 pts · 184d
YO MOMMA is so stupid she sits at ALDI's under the counter and goes beep.
TaterTot@piefed.social · 5 pts · 183d
Your mamma's so fat Ben Kenobi said: "That's no moon..... that's yo mamma!".
Zagam@piefed.social · 5 pts · 184d
Yo momma so mean it take a train and 2 busse to get on her good side.
mech@feddit.org · 4 pts · 184d
Yo mamma so big, when she sits around the house, she sits around the house.
Etterra@discuss.online · 3 pts · 184d
That's like the first one you learn when you're in grade school. It's right up there with "yo momma so fat she got her own ZIP code."
Etterra@discuss.online · 4 pts · 184d
Yo momma so ugly that Cronenberg cast her in a movie.
Jax@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 184d
Whoever created this image should be slapped
NichEherVielleicht@feddit.org · 3 pts · 184d
With my mum.
Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 184d
By Jax's mum. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
ZkhqrD5o@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 184d
"Richard Matthew Stallman, Titanic"
Zagam@piefed.social · 3 pts · 184d
Yo momma so fat when the weather man said it was chilly outside she ran out with a spoon.
lasta@piefed.world · 3 pts · 184d
Yo mama so hairy they filmed Gorillas in the Mist in her shower.
DrunkAnRoot@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 183d
yo momma so old she went to school with a t-rex
tatterdemalion@programming.dev · 2 pts · 183d
Your momma's so fat, she got shot with a tranquilizer dart when the hippos escaped from the zoo.
flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 184d
What the hell is going on with the scale in this graph?
Please explain.
unknown1234_5@kbin.earth · 5 pts · 183d
yo momma so fat
flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 183d
Noted.
ruko24@programming.dev · 2 pts · 183d
Yo momma so fat, she cut her finger and gravy came out
purplerabbit@piefed.blahaj.zone · -6 pts · 184d
Meh, can't say I'm really nostalgic for fatphobic jokes.