Anon makes a wish

765 points · 49 comments · view on lemmy.world

49 Comments

redditmademedoit@piefed.zip · 100 pts · 172d (2 replies)

Gay: didn't wish for a blowjob, fake: she probably thinks of him too.

Wicked@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 45d (1 reply)

Your empathy called, it wants you back.

nylo@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 44d

why would you necro this just to show that you don't understand how greentexts work

Aussiemandeus@aussie.zone · 69 pts · 171d (10 replies)

My ex from 16 years ago (16 year olds) wished me happy birthday the other week. Was weird we're both married with kids and never speak at all

slaacaa@lemmy.world · 66 pts · 171d

She’s DTF

(Doing The Friendship)

Beryl@jlai.lu · 29 pts · 171d (3 replies)

Weird but sweet anyway

Aussiemandeus@aussie.zone · 12 pts · 171d (2 replies)

Yeah just way outta the blue, now the real question is so I have to remember hers now? Cause I don't think i do haha

obelisk_complex@piefed.ca · 11 pts · 171d (1 reply)

If you want to, ask her and put it in your calendar! It's always nice to know someone remembers you fondly enough to send well wishes 😊

AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net · 6 pts · 171d

Yeah, this is great advice. It's unfortunate when pressure to do social niceties holds you back from enjoying meaningful connection with people. Some people are better at remembering dates than others, and caring enough to ask (and put it in one's calendar) is at least as powerful a gesture as actually remembering it.

OP could take a jokey tone to things, such as by expressing surprise that she was able to remember, and then asking what her birthday is

anonklay@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 171d (3 replies)

why is it weird? I do that too.

k0e3@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 171d (2 replies)

Because you're weird

anonklay@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 170d (1 reply)

Because you’re weird

i learn nothing from this

k0e3@lemmy.ca · 4 pts · 170d

You weren't supposed to because it's a joke.

luxadazy@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 171d
[ removed ]
mnemonicmonkeys@sh.itjust.works · 68 pts · 171d (1 reply)

I gotta admit, I like wholesome greentexts

cabillaud@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 170d

Wholesome? Or mushy?

SendMePhotos@lemmy.world · 56 pts · 172d

Dialectical_Specialist@quokk.au · 54 pts · 172d

fug where is the funny!?! 😭

peteypete420@sh.itjust.works · 49 pts · 171d (9 replies)

Fake: anon had a girlfriend

Gay: anon had dated someone who had sex with a man

MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 171d (8 replies)

I seriously don't get what's fun about this nihilism and gay-shaming.

damnedfurry@lemmy.world · 55 pts · 171d (7 replies)

It's just a running joke for greentexts to call them "fake and gay", which became having to come up with some justification to attach both labels to the story instead of just saying it is. This is completely regardless of what the greentext actually consists of.

The more you have to stretch to make the labels fit, the funnier it is.

AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net · 32 pts · 171d (6 replies)

Yeah, and I find it funny precisely because of the stretching to make the labels — it makes it feel like it's making fun of people who would unironically call things fake and gay in a manner that was nihilistic and homophobic.

It's similar to how I hate the "git gud" gatekeeping that can be quite prominent amongst fans of games like Dark Souls. However, I take great joy in saying "git gud" in a context where it's patently absurd, like when my housemate arrives home completely drenched from torrential rain. It turns the joke back on the gatekeepy rhetoric

yermaw@sh.itjust.works · 10 pts · 170d

"Sorry Im late, the bridge collapsed and I had to take an alternate route"

"Skill issue tbh"

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · -2 pts · 170d (4 replies)

I used to behave this way, but people took me seriously every time. Like saying Veterans should die off, because they are no longer of use (as criticism to our way of seeing humans as expendable) and I became very hated for this.

Krauerking@lemy.lol · 7 pts · 170d (3 replies)

Genuine question.

Can you see how that is not an obvious absurdist extreme and just sounds like an extreme position that would upset people?

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 1 pts · 170d (2 replies)

I was not an adult, and rather troubled. I coped in very poor ways.

Krauerking@lemy.lol · 4 pts · 170d

Ok. Well recognition is a huge hill to overcome. But coping with humor isn't always bad, communication is a skill that comes with and requires practice.
I hope you find out how to be you while not feeling like you are pushing people away.

Syndication@lemmy.today · 41 pts · 171d (14 replies)

Ngl I thought this was going to be a really fucked up greentext as soon as I read the word "cancer".

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · -27 pts · 170d (13 replies)
[ removed ]
RepleteLocum@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 23 pts · 170d (8 replies)

Sometimes relationships just don't work out?

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · -22 pts · 170d (7 replies)
[ removed ]
Coolkat@slrpnk.net · 19 pts · 170d

Username checks out

Zos_Kia@jlai.lu · 15 pts · 170d (5 replies)

What a strange take. He's a loser because he has an ex?

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · -15 pts · 170d (4 replies)
[ removed ]
MrShankles@reddthat.com · 15 pts · 170d (2 replies)

Not sure if trolling or projecting... hope you're actually doing well though

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 0 pts · 170d
[ removed ]
man_wtfhappenedtoyou@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 170d

Did you read it buddy? They broke up and he visited her because she had cancer. He's basically just happy she didn't fucking die. Where are you getting that she used him as a stepping stone from?

Gorillazrule@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 170d (1 reply)

Had me in the first half till I saw the username.

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 170d

Ok, some downvotes are expected, but like 30 out of nowhere is a clear sign of a bot account. How petty and self-righteous can you be?

EDIT: Also, no one gets to view the original comment, or get to see the argument now. You don't deserve it, nor will I ever be honest again.

NotBillMurray@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 170d (1 reply)

Is this some fucked up online performance art?

pulsey@feddit.org · 1 pts · 170d

user name is a hint

wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz · 40 pts · 171d

I did not expect anything wholesome from this c/...

glibg@lemmy.ca · 35 pts · 171d

Surprisingly touching, thanks for sharing

desiccated_event@piefed.blahaj.zone · 28 pts · 172d

Thank you, Anon.

DaedalousIlios@pawb.social · 15 pts · 170d (4 replies)

This anon's alright!

lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org · 8 pts · 170d (3 replies)

And not exactly alt-right!

tetris11@feddit.uk · 3 pts · 166d (1 reply)

*hoooh yeeeaah*
Threat Level: Alright
Not neccesarily alt-right
From Pepe on a peddling /pol/ site

He's a threat, a level
A level level threat
He's the tamest 4channer
I've ever seen yet

Threat level what? Alright
Threat level who? 4channer
Threat level why? Epstein files, gotta release 'em, peace I'm out!

lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 166d

I was thinking of the song The Kids Are Alt-Right by Bad Religion, but this works too

DaedalousIlios@pawb.social · 3 pts · 170d

Nice one! Take an updoot!

yuriRO@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 13 pts · 172d

Fuck man, i was not ready

RacerX@lemmy.zip · 8 pts · 171d

Can confirm. Am bassist for Northstar.

Aeri@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 168d

Imagine fumbling so hard that you don't get with a girl who is so into you that she wants you around while she's dying of cancer.