An identification key

Diplococcus, diplodocus

799 points · 44 comments · view on lemmy.world

44 Comments

sbv@sh.itjust.works · 97 pts · 187d (7 replies)

* Not known to cause gonorrhea

tdawg@lemmy.world · 26 pts · 187d (3 replies)

Someone has plans tonight

Klear@quokk.au · 13 pts · 187d

For science!

WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 187d (1 reply)

The same thing they do every night.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 186d

Try to give dinosaurs the clap!

Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 187d (2 replies)

Can you somehow make the dinosaur give you gonorrhea?

sness@sh.itjust.works · 11 pts · 187d (1 reply)

It's probably happened in one of those Chuck Tingle books.

Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 187d

You never know. But alas the dinosaur is not alive today so it would not be able to give you gonorrhea

ExtremeDullard@piefed.social · 59 pts · 187d (10 replies)

Diplodocuses (diplodocii?) do not cause gonorrhea? How are you so sure? Have you slept with one?

FiniteBanjo@feddit.online · 26 pts · 187d (8 replies)

I've seen enough of the internet to know an anthropomorphic dinosaur is fully capable of spreading a venereal disease.

TachyonTele@piefed.social · 8 pts · 187d (7 replies)

Only if you believe hard enough though

ThePantser@sh.itjust.works · 16 pts · 187d (3 replies)

Billy_fuccboi@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 187d (2 replies)

If you're clappy and you know it, see a doctor

tdawg@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 187d (1 reply)

What if ur not happy?

zedgeist@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 187d

urrrrrr

Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 187d (1 reply)

This Jurassic Park movie is getting weird pretty quickly.

Zorque@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 187d

Still, not a bad movie considering current trends.

Pringles@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 187d

Ork clap

Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 13 pts · 187d

Diplodocuses (diplodocii?)

Diplodocussy

Have you slept with one?

Have you not?

MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown@fedia.io · 22 pts · 187d (4 replies)

There’s a handy mnemonic for this:

  • DiploCOCcus CAUSEs gonerrhea
  • DiploDOcus DOesn’t
Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world · 23 pts · 187d (2 replies)

The fact that you have a mnemonic device for this makes me feel like you deserve to be on whatever lists you're on.

Exactly how many museums have you been banned from?

Edit: Spelling

Zozano@aussie.zone · 15 pts · 187d (1 reply)

you deserve to be on whatever lists you're on.

Holy shit lol.

I'm putting that one in my back pocket.

Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 187d

I'm honored.

Zozano@aussie.zone · 13 pts · 187d

I would've went with:

DiploCOCcus has a gonorrhoea infested COC

DiploDOcus open the DOor, get on the floor, everybody walk the dinosaur.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 187d (1 reply)

how do we know the diplodocus did not cause gonorrhea? what if it was like a giant koala?

WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 187d

You did not want to encounter a jurassic drop bear.

I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 187d

Yea, but those are like the only differences.

dumbass@piefed.social · 8 pts · 187d

Now we arent 100% sure it doesn't cause gonorrhea, someone's gotta fuck one first.

SatyrSack@quokk.au · 6 pts · 187d (2 replies)

DIPLO COCKS

  • very big [citation needed]
  • causes gonorrhea [citation needed]
MunkysUnkEnz0@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 186d (1 reply)

I came here to comment this

Maybe 20 years ago I went to see RJ D2 and Dipla opened up. I went over to purchase one of his DVD videos and the motherfucker, hit on my perfect ten redhead girlfriend in front of me. Granted, she was fucking beautiful. But he is a cunt. Definitely liked his first album. Anything after that is just drivel.

So yes, he probably has gonorrhea. Again, we'll give it to you or your loved ones.

MunkysUnkEnz0@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 186d

For the rest of the night he got to watch us dance and love all over each other because we were fucking down and he is a cunt. We wanted to rub it in his face. He was not getting any

BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 186d

Obligatory milenial joke:

Your mom, very big, causes gonorrhea

toynbee@piefed.social · 4 pts · 187d

I could get the same result with ssh-keygen!

minorkeys@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 187d

It does cause gonnatreea

Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de · 3 pts · 187d (1 reply)

Is diplobocus the equivalent of atomic lead? (Tiny and very bad for you) How about diploeocus? Some planet somewhere?

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 187d

diplofocus is the paleoptometrist

Tollana1234567@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 186d

there is prion that causes a deadly brain disease, and then theres the PRION bird which has the same name.

"the clap" is an old name for gonnorhea.

Enkrod@feddit.org · 3 pts · 187d

Somehow i read this as diarrhea and immediatly thought: "No I'd shit myself with either one."

jaybone@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 187d

Causes diarrhea

phoenixz@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 186d

Causes gonorrhea? IS gonorrhea, no?

explodicle@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 187d

But what about just Diplo, does he cause gonorrhea? Asking for a friend.

glorkon@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 185d

Here's my theory: All diplodocuses, much like all brontosauruses, are thin at one end, much MUCH thicker in the middle, and then thin again at the far end. That is the theory that I have and which is mine, and what it is too.

SnailMagnitude@mander.xyz · 1 pts · 186d

Afaiu it was them that passed it to humans just prior to the deluge.

Thankfully Noah invented wine to balance things out.

DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 1 pts · 185d

Diplococcus doesn't cause the clap, some organisms with diplococcus morphology cause the clap.

Smh op you should know better with that username than to spread this misinformation against a vibrant community of such individuals like pneumonia and meningitis

ODuffer@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 187d
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