Late Bloomer

509 points · 44 comments · view on lemmy.world

44 Comments

Sumocat@lemmy.world · 166 pts · 154d (6 replies)

I blame the parents. That baby broke a table leg with his head, and his dad is like, “maybe he’s just a late bloomer.” No, dude, that’s an undiagnosed concussion inflicted on a soft skulled baby — that’s brain damage.

dudinax@programming.dev · 25 pts · 154d (2 replies)

What are you going to do about it? Every baby gets those.

Javi@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 19 pts · 154d (1 reply)

That's actually why the dad believes the baby is a late bloomer; It took him this long to get a concussion? He's practically a toddler now!

SilverCode@lemmy.ml · 7 pts · 154d

Yeah, I mean, I couldn't even crawl before I rolled off the bed and hit the floor with my head while my Mom was trying to change me.

I like turtles 🐢

unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de · 13 pts · 154d (1 reply)

Actually the kid is clearly superhuman and the parents failed to recognize it. No way a human baby could break a solid table leg.

GraniteM@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 154d

And this is what you get when you buy the cheapest table!

r3g3n3x@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 154d

Plasticity. Otherwise every one in the human race would be soft lobotomized before 3.

WhiteOakBayou@lemmy.world · 83 pts · 154d (1 reply)

Lol bleak

BillyClark@piefed.social · 42 pts · 154d

Just wait until the next time the groundskeeper comes by with his lawnmower.

stray@pawb.social · 81 pts · 154d

Hope bro had an enjoyable life despite his judgy-ass parents.

hzl@piefed.blahaj.zone · 63 pts · 154d (1 reply)

Capitalist propaganda posting is worse than horny posting.

umbrella@lemmy.ml · 26 pts · 154d
[ removed ]
sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz · 63 pts · 154d (3 replies)

Evidence this man is a failure:

Can break tables with his soft infantile head

Cannot ride bike

Can do weed

Has a job

Rip, bozo. What a fucking idiot

restingOface@quokk.au · 16 pts · 154d (2 replies)
  • Likes KGATLW
sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz · 14 pts · 154d (1 reply)

Oh god I didn't notice. Actually irredeemable

ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 154d

It's saved by Castle Rat, obviously.

Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io · 62 pts · 154d

Traumatic Brain Injury IS a thing.

LiveLM@lemmy.zip · 56 pts · 154d

???
Judgmental ass comic lol

helpImTrappedOnline@lemmy.world · 55 pts · 154d (3 replies)

Those parents clearly never "bloomed" either. A baby shouldn't have been able to destroy a table leg unless it was completely rotted out. The bike tire must have been already bent. Falling off of it in the middle a field doesn't twist up the front wheel like that. It looks like the front wheel failed and the kid was ejected forward.

That poor kid grew up in a dangerous household with neglectful parents.

moondoggie@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 154d (2 replies)

How can a completely rotted out baby break a table leg?

helpImTrappedOnline@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 154d

Well most depictions of zombies do show them with superhuman strength.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 154d

when the core has nothing inside it, the abs flex inwards instead of doing what they're supposed to. that was a fun thing to learn.

0_o7@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 43 pts · 154d

Bloomer humor

IAmYouButYouDontKnowYet@reddthat.com · 39 pts · 154d

It's like what happens when parents don't teach their kid and expect them to just know everything.

rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works · 34 pts · 154d

A "late bloomer" can live a perfectly happy and fulfilling life if you just support and believe in them the same as you would a bright kid.

ramble81@lemmy.zip · 31 pts · 154d

“Maybe your only purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others”

finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 154d (2 replies)

Plot Twist: The parents were killed in a car accident on the way home from the hospital with their new son. While he survived, miraculously uninjured, and was adopted out, the parents became ghosts, unseen, hovering over him for the rest of his life ... to reunite only at the end.

chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 6 pts · 154d (1 reply)

Would make sense except they have different clothes and get grey hair

finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 154d

Ghost fashions are mysterious to us living people.

oldscratchXV@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 154d

Gee, thanks. As if I didn't feel bad enough about my life already./s

Entertainmeonly@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 15 pts · 154d (2 replies)

Ya, but how'd he die?

Deceptichum@quokk.au · 30 pts · 154d
[ removed ]
captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 154d

Hit by a self-driving car while holding his sign.

AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip · 12 pts · 154d (3 replies)

The fuck is this supposed to mean?

lobut@lemmy.ca · 10 pts · 153d (1 reply)

I think it's just a play on the word "bloom" as the flowers bloom after he's dead as opposed to being someone that "bloomed" in life

IhaveCrabs111@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 153d
[ removed ]
Gold_E_Lox@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 153d

pro suicide propaganda

TheFrirish@tarte.nuage-libre.fr · 11 pts · 154d

I like this is neither edgy nor funny.

Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net · 10 pts · 154d

Hey now, Castle Rat fucking rules

SethTaylor@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 154d (4 replies)

I don't get it

kshade@lemmy.world · 34 pts · 154d (2 replies)

There's flowers blooming on the grave in the last panel.

Star@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 153d

Funny how many people overlook that :)

SethTaylor@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 153d

Thanks! That's quite funny, actually

Beep@lemmus.org · 3 pts · 154d

Neither did they...

DarkCloud@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 154d

Late for a society that's properly calibrated to our human nature.

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 4 pts · 154d

Pushing up daisies... Eventually.

AntiBullyRanger@ani.social · 2 pts · 154d

Maybe you project too much on people that are not you?