If this were the exact wording it would be hard to find someone not looking like that. You are using hard words for my trans dense self. It took me like half a minute to load. But yes it's a funny meme but I am required by my head to respond seriously to memes for some reason.
I'm really proud of myself because I was this person a while back and people talked to me about a bunch of this stuff and I actually did manage to change my beliefs for the better. Looking forward to changing some other shitty beliefs I don't know I have when others point them out!
We, humans, are kinda built to run on a series of memories and experiences that build up, telling us what's safe and what isn't. In an ideal world, this means that new things can be compared against those templates and guide is to safe movement through life.
But when it comes to situations where those templates get challenged from the outside, we're scrabbling on the inside against all these alarms saying "but what about...". It's a process by which we are forced to doubt ourselves. That's not what you'd call a recommended thing. The more we doubt ourselves, the more confusion, distress, dissonance, and anxiety we feel.
Trying to initiate that from the inside? That's shit that can take decades of therapy when you're dysfunctional. It isn't much easier when you're not, but most people have at least a little dysfunction.
It's a skill to self examine and self critique. Like any skill, you have to practice to get good. But, unlike most other skills, your brain is fighting you the entire time.
But it's necessary. Not just on this topic. It's a skill we all need to at least dabble in, lest we fall into the trap of never changing at all
I've been gently explaining the situation of "being trans in the UK" to cis allies recently. The reaction I keep getting is "huh I didn't realise it was that bad".
Yeah and I'm not getting mad at them or giving them shit for it, but later it just drives me crazy how quickly my country is shifting into fascist depravity and how little the white libs are even noticing.
Right intentions but wrong method, if you wanna people to question their conditions you need to use a better wording to let other people get the message.
Yes. You can call me an ally if you want, or not, I don't care. I don't have a need to be called an ally. I'm here, and I'm reading and quietly learning. I'll support you, and go to bat for you when people speak badly of you. But I've got a bunch of other problems to deal with. Don't ask anything of me beyond that.
11 Comments
bizarroland@lemmy.world · 36 pts · 26d
I am 100% guilty of this, at least once, but I will also say that if they're looking at you like this, they're probably at least taking you seriously.
It's a lot to fucking process.
KernelTale@programming.dev · 17 pts · 26d
If this were the exact wording it would be hard to find someone not looking like that. You are using hard words for my trans dense self. It took me like half a minute to load. But yes it's a funny meme but I am required by my head to respond seriously to memes for some reason.
Quokka@quokk.au · 5 pts · 26d
Using that exact wording wouldn’t be very useful, it’s more in the moment explaining something relating to a topic.
craftrabbit@lemmy.zip · 13 pts · 26d
I'm really proud of myself because I was this person a while back and people talked to me about a bunch of this stuff and I actually did manage to change my beliefs for the better. Looking forward to changing some other shitty beliefs I don't know I have when others point them out!
Alberat@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 25d
southsamurai@sh.itjust.works · 8 pts · 26d
It's a difficult thing to do.
We, humans, are kinda built to run on a series of memories and experiences that build up, telling us what's safe and what isn't. In an ideal world, this means that new things can be compared against those templates and guide is to safe movement through life.
But when it comes to situations where those templates get challenged from the outside, we're scrabbling on the inside against all these alarms saying "but what about...". It's a process by which we are forced to doubt ourselves. That's not what you'd call a recommended thing. The more we doubt ourselves, the more confusion, distress, dissonance, and anxiety we feel.
Trying to initiate that from the inside? That's shit that can take decades of therapy when you're dysfunctional. It isn't much easier when you're not, but most people have at least a little dysfunction.
It's a skill to self examine and self critique. Like any skill, you have to practice to get good. But, unlike most other skills, your brain is fighting you the entire time.
But it's necessary. Not just on this topic. It's a skill we all need to at least dabble in, lest we fall into the trap of never changing at all
Domi@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 8 pts · 26d
I've been gently explaining the situation of "being trans in the UK" to cis allies recently. The reaction I keep getting is "huh I didn't realise it was that bad".
Honestly infuriating sometimes.
Quokka@quokk.au · 6 pts · 26d
At least they realise and aren’t saying “oh it’s not that bad, let’s just wait to see if anything gets worse before we worry”
Domi@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 26d
Yeah and I'm not getting mad at them or giving them shit for it, but later it just drives me crazy how quickly my country is shifting into fascist depravity and how little the white libs are even noticing.
alapakala@quokk.au · 0 pts · 25d
buran@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 25d
Right intentions but wrong method, if you wanna people to question their conditions you need to use a better wording to let other people get the message.
EnchiladaRaisins@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 15d
Yes. You can call me an ally if you want, or not, I don't care. I don't have a need to be called an ally. I'm here, and I'm reading and quietly learning. I'll support you, and go to bat for you when people speak badly of you. But I've got a bunch of other problems to deal with. Don't ask anything of me beyond that.