That strategy worked well when it was just me and the ~10 articles of clothing I own. But now that I'm in a household of six that approach doesn't work anymore.
My bachelor strategy was clothes in three categories:
I prefer to put away my clothes, but my wife prefers piles.
She can't stand to spend twenty minutes folding the laundry, so she spends ten minutes every day digging through piles trying to find things. The math doesn't really check out, but then again laundry is brutal for a lot of people so I get it
Personally, if I leave things in piles I go bonkers and it makes getting dressed every day a big chore. So you do you, but I guess it's a matter of preference
Sounds like adhd. Setting 20 minutes aside for the purpose of folding is a monumental task. 10 minutes of panic searching when time is of the essence? Now that's something I could hard focus on.
Yeah, she was diagnosed a few years ago and suddenly a lot of things made sense.
I've tried to help her by putting her laundry away, but that doesn't really work either. Her organization scheme is chaos to an outside observer, and if something goes in the wrong spot it's like it's gone forever. Easily leads to a meltdown when she's trying to get ready for work and can't find the specific thing she was looking for.
I don't really know what to do about that. Can't win either way, so I guess she just has to pay the neurodivergence tax on her time
Yup. Noise canceling headphones and audio books has helped me if a task doesn't really require "braining". If it does require "braining" I'll find a noise youtube video. My preference is brown noise or any super deep low frequency noise.
You can't do anything, she has to choose to make changes.
As someone struggling with this for decades, I see what she's doing. BTDT.
For me it's always been if something gets moved it may as well not exist. She is struggling to do the work necessary to produce an organized result, because (in the moment) folding laundry is more overwhelming.
There's a book I highly recommend called ADHD and Adults (I forget the author), that's really insightful about how ADHD manifests differently in adults than children. While looking for that book I found this page and the one titled Dirty Laundry gave me a chuckle given this post.
Also check out How to ADHD on YouTube. For anyone who's just starting to understand ADHD, she does a good job helping people see it from a better perspective.
As a partner of someone with ADHD who's developed coping strategies, helping her is a tall order. She has to want to work on something, it has to promise big rewards for small change, and she has to really want to do it. That's a lot for someone with ADHD.
To rephrase the question: what's something simple and easy that you'd prefer the task or cost of maintaining and running an overly complex machine than actually doing it?
21 Comments
neidu3@sh.itjust.works · 19 pts · 36d
Sorting and Folding laundry
ExtraMedicated@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 36d
Do people not simply toss the clothes on a pile on top of a dresser? Am I the weird one?
neidu3@sh.itjust.works · 11 pts · 36d
That strategy worked well when it was just me and the ~10 articles of clothing I own. But now that I'm in a household of six that approach doesn't work anymore.
My bachelor strategy was clothes in three categories:
Bougie_Birdie@piefed.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 36d
I prefer to put away my clothes, but my wife prefers piles.
She can't stand to spend twenty minutes folding the laundry, so she spends ten minutes every day digging through piles trying to find things. The math doesn't really check out, but then again laundry is brutal for a lot of people so I get it
Personally, if I leave things in piles I go bonkers and it makes getting dressed every day a big chore. So you do you, but I guess it's a matter of preference
meco03211@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 36d
Sounds like adhd. Setting 20 minutes aside for the purpose of folding is a monumental task. 10 minutes of panic searching when time is of the essence? Now that's something I could hard focus on.
Bougie_Birdie@piefed.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 36d
Yeah, she was diagnosed a few years ago and suddenly a lot of things made sense.
I've tried to help her by putting her laundry away, but that doesn't really work either. Her organization scheme is chaos to an outside observer, and if something goes in the wrong spot it's like it's gone forever. Easily leads to a meltdown when she's trying to get ready for work and can't find the specific thing she was looking for.
I don't really know what to do about that. Can't win either way, so I guess she just has to pay the neurodivergence tax on her time
meco03211@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 36d
Yup. Noise canceling headphones and audio books has helped me if a task doesn't really require "braining". If it does require "braining" I'll find a noise youtube video. My preference is brown noise or any super deep low frequency noise.
Onomatopoeia@lemmy.cafe · 1 pts · 36d
You can't do anything, she has to choose to make changes.
As someone struggling with this for decades, I see what she's doing. BTDT.
For me it's always been if something gets moved it may as well not exist. She is struggling to do the work necessary to produce an organized result, because (in the moment) folding laundry is more overwhelming.
There's a book I highly recommend called ADHD and Adults (I forget the author), that's really insightful about how ADHD manifests differently in adults than children. While looking for that book I found this page and the one titled Dirty Laundry gave me a chuckle given this post.
Also check out How to ADHD on YouTube. For anyone who's just starting to understand ADHD, she does a good job helping people see it from a better perspective.
As a partner of someone with ADHD who's developed coping strategies, helping her is a tall order. She has to want to work on something, it has to promise big rewards for small change, and she has to really want to do it. That's a lot for someone with ADHD.
SuiXi3D@fedia.io · 3 pts · 36d
That takes more effort than taking them out of the dryer, so yes.
Diddlydee@feddit.uk · 9 pts · 36d
Making Rube Goldberg devices.
Onomatopoeia@lemmy.cafe · 1 pts · 36d
Winner
farmgineer@nord.pub · 4 pts · 36d
Mental health/therapy.
Barring that, weeding my fields
AstroLightz@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 36d
Turning on/off a light switch that's a few meters away.
village604@adultswim.fan · 1 pts · 36d
That's why I got smart switches (that can only talk to Home Assistant).
Well, the real reason is ADHD, but forgetting to turn off lights is an issue.
DmMacniel@feddit.org · 3 pts · 36d
Chopping coconuts.
sunsofold@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 35d
Isn't part of the definition of 'rube Goldberg machine' the machine does something simple and easy?
Venator@lemmy.nz · 1 pts · 34d
To rephrase the question: what's something simple and easy that you'd prefer the task or cost of maintaining and running an overly complex machine than actually doing it?
magnetosphere@fedia.io · 2 pts · 36d
Changing fitted sheets
CmdrShepard49@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 35d
Also folding them.
DebatableRaccoon@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 35d
Bureaucracy. Oh wait...
TheLunatickle@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 36d
Cooking meth. (The explosion would be hilarious)