At my last job (I was male presenting) I got in trouble with HR because a guy at a work table nearby told one of the women this, and I yelled back "you'd sound a lot smarter if you shut the fuck up" and I guess I was the one being inappropriate.
That's when you have to give them the most insane, full tooth, homicidal smile while asking them their blood type because surely someone who looks like them has nice kidneys and they'll fetch a great price at the local black market organ swap meet.
Buncha women talking about an annoying trend that disproportionately affects women. You hop in with "This doesn't just happen to women." Yeah, that is invalidating.
It may not be limited to women, but it’s overwhelmingly women who hear it.
I’m 42 and I’ve been hearing “you would look so much prettier if you smiled more” since I was a veryyoung teen, often by men old enough to be my grandfather. I used to comply, now I give them the middle finger because I don’t owe anyone a smile.
I have never been told to smile in public, and I was unable to smile during the three or so decades I lived as a man. Its not a thing they tell to men. We are expected to smile and be pretty; they aren't.
23 Comments
EggInDisguise@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 33 pts · 1d
At my last job (I was male presenting) I got in trouble with HR because a guy at a work table nearby told one of the women this, and I yelled back "you'd sound a lot smarter if you shut the fuck up" and I guess I was the one being inappropriate.
velma@sh.itjust.works · 22 pts · 1d
You weren't wrong. Lame they got you in trouble instead of him.
Taleya@aussie.zone · 21 pts · 1d
Can't have profanity in a workplace full of harassment. It's unprofessional
velma@sh.itjust.works · 8 pts · 1d
I've been working for small companies for too long, I almost forgot about that kind of weird rules setup!
Taleya@aussie.zone · 9 pts · 1d
I've been working in cinema since 2012, at this point there are no rules
velma@sh.itjust.works · 25 pts · 1d
Common denominator and all that
LuxSpark@lemmy.cafe · 13 pts · 1d
This is not limited to women. I think that they see someone not being a grinning idiot and are confused.
Wren@lemmy.today · 31 pts · 1d
It's statistically far, far more likely to be directed at women.
Do you have any idea where you're commenting?
Malyca@lemmy.zip · 13 pts · 1d
I've had guys stop me on the street and demand I smile. I felt like an animal at the zoo.
greatwhitebuffalo41@slrpnk.net · 8 pts · 1d
That's when you have to give them the most insane, full tooth, homicidal smile while asking them their blood type because surely someone who looks like them has nice kidneys and they'll fetch a great price at the local black market organ swap meet.
boobookittyfrick@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 20h
greatwhitebuffalo41@slrpnk.net · 2 pts · 13h
Love the username honestly lol
boobookittyfrick@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 12h
greatwhitebuffalo41@slrpnk.net · 2 pts · 12h
I watched this and dogma recently. God I love Kevin Smith and Jason Mews. Oh, I watched Zack and Miri too.
LuxSpark@lemmy.cafe · 0 pts · 1d
As an introvert, I have been told the same thing. Not meant to invalidate women’s experiences with this phenomenon.
Wren@lemmy.today · 15 pts · 1d
Buncha women talking about an annoying trend that disproportionately affects women. You hop in with "This doesn't just happen to women." Yeah, that is invalidating.
Are you posting in the right community?
LuxSpark@lemmy.cafe · 1 pts · 18h
Are you invalidating my experience? I’m a person too.
velma@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 14h
You’re more than welcome to make your own post to talk about this. In a completely different community.
Wren@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 14h
Yes. Go share your experience somewhere else.
velma@sh.itjust.works · 28 pts · 1d
Telling women to smile is well-documented as a type of sexist microaggression.
dkppunk@piefed.social · 25 pts · 1d
It may not be limited to women, but it’s overwhelmingly women who hear it.
I’m 42 and I’ve been hearing “you would look so much prettier if you smiled more” since I was a very young teen, often by men old enough to be my grandfather. I used to comply, now I give them the middle finger because I don’t owe anyone a smile.
hildegarde@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 8h
I have never been told to smile in public, and I was unable to smile during the three or so decades I lived as a man. Its not a thing they tell to men. We are expected to smile and be pretty; they aren't.
kkj@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 17h
Capitalism, mostly, but that's no reason to make it worse by trying to control others' emotions.