OP survives horror movies

438 points · 33 comments · view on lemmy.world

33 Comments

sundray@lemmus.org · 68 pts · 2d (3 replies)

The Ring: "I don't even OWN a TV."

HairyHarry@lemmy.world · 25 pts · 2d (1 reply)

I don't wear jewelry.

zloubida@sh.itjust.works · 8 pts · 2d

I never boxed.

kestrel7_7@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 1d

No VCR

ThePantser@sh.itjust.works · 23 pts · 2d (2 replies)

The Burbs: IDGAF what my neighbors are doing and you shouldn't either.

Evil Dead: Reading Books? I'll wait for the movie.

Tremors: Leave

The Purge: Fake wound and blood and inject a paralyzer. Play dead until morning. Wonder if they visited that in the sequels because I have only watched the first.

BarrelAgedBoredom@lemmy.zip · 22 pts · 1d

I know this is a shitpost but I can't help myself, paralytic drugs also paralyze your diaphragm and only last a few minutes. Pancuronium is the longest lasting paralytic and a single dose will get you 60-90 mins max. Youd spend your time fully conscious while suffocating and be dead before anyone could notice your sweet prosthetic makeup.

Also, you'd still have a pulse and warmth/color to your skin. Paralytics don't stop your heartbeat, and are know to raise it to dangerous levels or cause dysrhythmias if not carefully controlled. So anything more than a passing glance (assuming you lived long enough for it to matter) would immediately give up the game and you'd be defenseless

JayDee@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1d

I hope you like rock climbing and walking through desert terrain, cuz in Tremors the valley's one exiting road is blocked by a rock slide, so leaving isn't as easy done as it is said.

driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br · 19 pts · 1d

Now survive Troll you swedish she/they

Okokimup@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 2d

Nope: nope

kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 1d (3 replies)

Damn Swedes are horror-proof!

Natanael@infosec.pub · 4 pts · 1d (2 replies)

Inget är mer skrämmande än ett halvår av totalt mörker per år

kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1d (1 reply)

förutom kanske sex månader av obevekligt dagsljus

Natanael@infosec.pub · 1 pts · 1d

Kiruna

umbrella@lemmy.ml · 10 pts · 1d (1 reply)

human centipede:

cannedtuna@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1d

I would simply not.

Also obligatory

ThunderComplex@lemmy.today · 9 pts · 1d

Funny Games: Too tired to play, let’s do it tomorrow

Ready Or Not: Not yet

Rec: Damn I forgot to press record

kayohtie@pawb.social · 7 pts · 1d

ITT people who don't quite get the post

Know1ng: that's not how you spell it

It Follows: idk I might be fukt I read pet sematary

Splice: just tie a knot instead

WoodScientist@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 1d (2 replies)

My survival suggestion is, "never assume the monster is dead until you have removed its head from its body."

WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1d
captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 1d

Doesn't work in Return of the Living Dead.

LodeMike@lemmy.today · 5 pts · 1d

American psycho is not a horror movie. It's way too good to be a horror movie. It's a thriller.

A_norny_mousse@piefed.zip · 5 pts · 1d (2 replies)

Seven: Idgaf about catholicism but this one really fucked me up.

It's probably not even a real horror movie for some; I'm just not for this genre at all.

The Fly (80s version) is one of the few I watched. Also really fucked me up. Help me OOP: how could I have survived it?

Buddahriffic@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1d (1 reply)

For the fly, find Janeway, she will make it her mission to kill both of the hybrid entities, which might result in you going back to normal.

Edit: Or it might result in Janeway becoming like Jason and always slowly walking towards you with a machete. At which point I think you need to recruit Freddy to deal with her.

WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1d

I think during the time of The Fly Janeway was running for a city council seat in Boston (she had to; her opponent was under the influence of a Melmacian agent.)

weps@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1d

weird sounds in the basement or attic?

I'm not going

Magnus@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 4 pts · 1d

Alien, rockets not too good yet.

RickyRigatoni@piefed.zip · 3 pts · 1d (2 replies)

Aliens Vs Predator: I would fully support any immigrant who attacks sexual predators.

DakRalter@thelemmy.club · 3 pts · 1d

WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1d

Except the "Aliens" are pretty much always shown to be born locally and the "Predators" never eat their kills.

pineapple@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 1d (1 reply)

Scream?

cannedtuna@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 1d

NickwithaC@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1d

Sinister: I won't move house

AgentOrangesicle@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1d

This is a Masterclass.