EvilHankVenture

u/EvilHankVenture@lemmy.world
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on hmm · c/comicstrips · 4 pts · 2d

If it's aluminium, does that mean it's platinium, tantalium and lanthanium?

I was in a meeting planning a large corporate event. A chef was there discussing food options and how they were having trouble finding a kosher meal provider but they have a work around until they find a final solution. Me and one other person both looked up and made eye contact, but no one else reacted. I had to pull the chef aside and ask him not to use that phrase when speaking about kosher meals.

on Every. Single. Time. · c/memes · 3 pts · 34d

I was drunk and surfing the internet on my laptop when I got frustrated with windows crashing constantly. An hour later I had installed Linux. Half of that time was backing up my files.

That was a test to see if you were for real. I have a new technology they don't want you to know about. I just need an investor to help me build it. It recycles your feces into more food than you originally ate. If McDonalds finds out they will kill me. I can get you in on the ground floor for $10000