I have a suspicion that most of men's problems and their ability to handle their lives stems from their incapability of sucking their own d***s.

-25 points · 31 comments · view on lemmy.world

31 Comments

cattywampas@lemmy.world · 26 pts · 186d (3 replies)

Sucking your own dick feels a lot more like sucking dick than getting your dick sucked.

gon@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 7 pts · 186d

Stop shattering my dreams!!!!

rockerface@lemmy.cafe · 7 pts · 186d

You say that like it's a bad thing

ZiggyTheZygote@lemmy.ca · 4 pts · 186d

Hehehe

Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca · 13 pts · 186d (5 replies)

You guys can't suck you own dicks?

Engywuck@lemmy.zip · 5 pts · 186d (3 replies)

Look, guy has grown a tail!

Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 186d (2 replies)

It's prehensile, so more like an elephant's trunk than a tail. But let me tell you, it's expensive with tailors and I'm really careful and nervous around closing doors. Don't get me started with elevators.

froh42@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 185d (1 reply)

more like an elephant's trunk than a tail.

Eating in public must be really weird for you.

Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 184d

Fine for me. Weird for everyone else.

surewhynotlem@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 162d

"And during the difficult parts of my life, where were you then Jesus?"

"That was when I carried you.

And that was difficult, you see, because I had to let go of my big-ass cock and let it drag in the sand"

-Footprints (and more) in the sand

Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 186d (4 replies)

I don't know. I think if we could all do that we'd just have new problems, like never leaving the house.

MarriedCavelady50@lemmy.ml · 6 pts · 186d
[ removed ]
Valmond@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 186d (2 replies)

You don't have to do it in your home.

Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 186d (1 reply)

Seems impolite to do it in public.

surewhynotlem@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 162d

Seems impolite to NOT do it in public, if you ask me

schnurrito@discuss.tchncs.de · 6 pts · 186d

Some men can do that. Go ahead and ask them if they are that much happier.

Strider@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 186d

Yep, removing sexuality from humans would remove a lot of challenges.

(Also some positives. Don't quote me on this)

Janx@piefed.social · 3 pts · 186d (4 replies)

I thought it was self-censoring for no fucking reason.

EDIT: Never mind, sounds like it's a parental feature on their device.

ZiggyTheZygote@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 186d (3 replies)

What do you mean?

Janx@piefed.social · 2 pts · 186d (2 replies)

Maybe it's your instance, but it censored "dicks".

ZiggyTheZygote@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 186d (1 reply)

Oh it's the family phone, there's a feature on it that censors bad words, stupid mom put it. God.

Janx@piefed.social · 2 pts · 186d

Ohhh, that makes a lot more sense!

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 3 pts · 186d (3 replies)

I can suck my own dick by getting a tube just big enough for my penis to fit in and long enough to reach my mouth. 🤷‍♂️

Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca · 7 pts · 186d (1 reply)

Dong bong?

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 3 pts · 186d

Hookahwck

supersquirrel@sopuli.xyz · 5 pts · 186d

Technology makes all of our lives better!

givesomefucks@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 186d

Yeah, like finding out you could didn't fuck anybody up...

Engywuck@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 186d

In the shower?

Brkdncr@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 186d

I think testosterone has a lot to do with it. Anyone that started taking T can tell you that.

nisemikol@scribe.disroot.org · 1 pts · 185d (1 reply)

Amusing thought, but I don't think most women can lick their own pussies either, and they (in general) don't seem to be as fucked up as men (in general) are . . .

clubb@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 185d

You know, I've met enough assholes on both sides to disprove this argument. It really seems like people will be shit regardless of gender.

In conclusion, everyone should suck their own genitals!

MedicPigBabySaver@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 186d

No