I had sex with a guy who spent the entire evening telling me the plots of various Star Wars novels. He was a good storyteller and I found it very attractive.
There are basically two paths to romantic success:
Make yourself into a generally attractive person
Find a weirdo that likes you as you are
Path 1 requires way more personal work, but it's easier to find someone because you're compatible with more people. Path 2 requires way more effort searching for the perfect match, because they're out there but a lot rarer and harder to find.
Personally, I say split the difference and take the middle path: work on yourself enough to find a mid-tier weirdo.
Path 2 requires way more effort searching for the perfect match, because they’re out there but a lot rarer and harder to find.
My god I'm so glad I met my husband back in the days when online dating hadn't been completely enshittified. (Or so I've heard, haven't used online dating sites in the last decade.) We met on okcupid in 2014. Their personality and interest quizzes were actually pretty good if you engaged with them honestly. My husband and I were a 99% match. And yeah...I found my weirdo. <3
Online dating used to be so good for weirdos like us! I wouldn't dare making an account these days, it's pointless with everything being centered about looks and a conversation starter that stands out from hundreds of others.
Path 1 is dangerous if you only manage to put on the mask of a more attractive person and hide your nerdyness.
Cause after 3 years you'll be sick of masking and if your partner isn't attracted to the real you, any long term relationship is doomed to fail.
My weirdo and I found each other and then started working on being more rounded people, I think we got really lucky we made it through the first few years and got to where we are now, 12 years on.
You can get really lucky on path 2 and find your weirdo quickly, especially if you're already social in circles that cater to your brand of weirdo. It's a roll of the dice, though.
Either works for either, really. I've masked my weirdness enough to have moderate luck in the short term on path 1, I've had luck scouring for real weirdos on path 2. Both take effort.
For a long term spouse, I still think the middle path is best. I wouldn't have been happy long term with the normies on path 1, and the certified freaks on path 2 wouldn't have been healthy long term either. You wanna hit that sweet spot where you roughly have your shit together, but you're not dulling your shine much.
1 is for all relationships, romantic and not. Being a better (or even just more well-rounded) person supports all areas, since you can make more connections, and better maintain them in all situations. 2 can be a way to build a really strong connection, but one or two shared interests, and a good personality match does not a relationship make - especially as people and situations change.
To his credit, he was an interesting well-rounded person. That's probably why he was able to make his Star Wars descriptions so engaging. It was like listening to Dan Carlin.
My wife was binging some reality romance show and out of the blue, started talking about it. It was kind of interesting but not where I wanted to watch it. But she kept getting more and more passionate about each character. I kinda stopped listening halfway because I just found it very sexy as she kept going on and on.
The game is trivialized by just kind of knowing what you're doing. I did a run without grinding magic draws or card refine or grinding for items to refine or anything like that and I still breezed through it. It's probably the easiest Final Fantasy game I've played.
Quistis is phenomenal. But she's a terrible match for Squall. She likes him because he's not childish. But he's still not mature. And she's more of an intellectual who needs mature conversations, which Squall is not equipped for. There's a reason why she only really gets close to Cid.
Also, the whole teacher/motherly figure aspect is very problematic. So while she's best girl, Rinoa is best girl for Squall. Same how Aerith was best girl, but Tifa was best girl for Cloud. Or Quina was best girl, but Garnet was best girl for Zidane.
She was, but I received the biggest antiboner I could. After having met her the next time, I ran into woods, took LSD and got caught by the police. Guess I was the crazy one
66 Comments
NimbleNemesis@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 64 pts · 164d
I had sex with a guy who spent the entire evening telling me the plots of various Star Wars novels. He was a good storyteller and I found it very attractive.
original_charles@lemmy.world · 36 pts · 164d
Wow, is that an option? Here I am just working on myself to become a more interesting, well-rounded person, like a dumbass.
agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works · 41 pts · 164d
There are basically two paths to romantic success:
Path 1 requires way more personal work, but it's easier to find someone because you're compatible with more people. Path 2 requires way more effort searching for the perfect match, because they're out there but a lot rarer and harder to find.
Personally, I say split the difference and take the middle path: work on yourself enough to find a mid-tier weirdo.
WoodScientist@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 163d
My god I'm so glad I met my husband back in the days when online dating hadn't been completely enshittified. (Or so I've heard, haven't used online dating sites in the last decade.) We met on okcupid in 2014. Their personality and interest quizzes were actually pretty good if you engaged with them honestly. My husband and I were a 99% match. And yeah...I found my weirdo. <3
RheumatoidArthritis@mander.xyz · 3 pts · 163d
Online dating used to be so good for weirdos like us! I wouldn't dare making an account these days, it's pointless with everything being centered about looks and a conversation starter that stands out from hundreds of others.
teslekova@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 163d
Number two has worked for me, but it took 25 years.
Worth it though. We are freaks together. 😄
mech@feddit.org · 3 pts · 163d
Path 1 is dangerous if you only manage to put on the mask of a more attractive person and hide your nerdyness.
Cause after 3 years you'll be sick of masking and if your partner isn't attracted to the real you, any long term relationship is doomed to fail.
JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 164d
My weirdo and I found each other and then started working on being more rounded people, I think we got really lucky we made it through the first few years and got to where we are now, 12 years on.
agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 163d
You can get really lucky on path 2 and find your weirdo quickly, especially if you're already social in circles that cater to your brand of weirdo. It's a roll of the dice, though.
PhoenixDog@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 163d
I'm the number two.
I met my partner on Tinder. We were just supposed to fuck a few times.
We got married 8 months later.
SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 164d
1 is of you want to sleep/date around, 2 is if you want to find a husband/wife, no?
agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 163d
Either works for either, really. I've masked my weirdness enough to have moderate luck in the short term on path 1, I've had luck scouring for real weirdos on path 2. Both take effort.
For a long term spouse, I still think the middle path is best. I wouldn't have been happy long term with the normies on path 1, and the certified freaks on path 2 wouldn't have been healthy long term either. You wanna hit that sweet spot where you roughly have your shit together, but you're not dulling your shine much.
PlzGivHugs@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 164d
1 is for all relationships, romantic and not. Being a better (or even just more well-rounded) person supports all areas, since you can make more connections, and better maintain them in all situations. 2 can be a way to build a really strong connection, but one or two shared interests, and a good personality match does not a relationship make - especially as people and situations change.
a_non_monotonic_function@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 163d
Lol, dumbass.
anotherspinelessdem@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 164d
Lots of different people like lots of different things.
Everyone is someone's kink.
Skullgrid@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 164d
some kinks are rarer and more easily fulfilled, leaving you with jack shit
NimbleNemesis@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 159d
To his credit, he was an interesting well-rounded person. That's probably why he was able to make his Star Wars descriptions so engaging. It was like listening to Dan Carlin.
VitoRobles@lemmy.today · 7 pts · 163d
My wife was binging some reality romance show and out of the blue, started talking about it. It was kind of interesting but not where I wanted to watch it. But she kept getting more and more passionate about each character. I kinda stopped listening halfway because I just found it very sexy as she kept going on and on.
Slovene@feddit.nl · 5 pts · 163d
Oh, was he a great orator? Was he a cunning linguist?
PhoenixDog@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 163d
👈👈😎
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world · 24 pts · 164d
What's unbelievable is that the plot explanation required an entire 45 minutes
"Make sword also shout dragon kill eat sweet roll not die"
dmention7@midwest.social · 5 pts · 164d
45 minutes high time is like 5 minutes tops in real time. Or at least that's how shit like movies and conversations always feel for me.
Omegamanthethird@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 163d
Last of the blades, forgive nazi dragon, kill Voldemort dragon in Valhalla
Was there more to the plot?
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 2 pts · 162d
Take back what you said about Paarthurnax or I'll start listing reasons why FFVIII was the worst PS era Final Fantasy
Omegamanthethird@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 162d
I mean, I forgave the nazi dragon. You know how valuable having a dragon on your side is?
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 2 pts · 162d
1: the game is trivialized by 15 minutes of grinding magic reserves at the start
Omegamanthethird@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 161d
The game is trivialized by just kind of knowing what you're doing. I did a run without grinding magic draws or card refine or grinding for items to refine or anything like that and I still breezed through it. It's probably the easiest Final Fantasy game I've played.
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 2 pts · 160d
2: Quistis is best girl and yet we are forced into the Rinoa romance
Omegamanthethird@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 160d
Quistis is phenomenal. But she's a terrible match for Squall. She likes him because he's not childish. But he's still not mature. And she's more of an intellectual who needs mature conversations, which Squall is not equipped for. There's a reason why she only really gets close to Cid.
Also, the whole teacher/motherly figure aspect is very problematic. So while she's best girl, Rinoa is best girl for Squall. Same how Aerith was best girl, but Tifa was best girl for Cloud. Or Quina was best girl, but Garnet was best girl for Zidane.
Kolanaki@pawb.social · 3 pts · 164d
It would take 45 minutes just to explain the convoluted time travel shenanigans that explain why Alduin appeared in the first place.
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 164d
"Somehow, dragon returned"
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 1 pts · 162d
Magic is the somehow
Slovene@feddit.nl · 3 pts · 163d
Twerk eat hot chip and lie
WoodScientist@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 163d
I mean, if you really get into the lore, there is a lot there. The actual immediate plot, however, could be so summarized.
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 163d
Pointy end goes in the other guy
Anarki_@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 20 pts · 164d
Keeper.
vivalapivo@lemmy.today · 16 pts · 164d
One time a girl invited me over, we smoked pot and she described how her boyfriend died in detail. We haven't had sex
iThinkDifferentThanU@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 164d
vivalapivo@lemmy.today · 6 pts · 164d
She was, but I received the biggest antiboner I could. After having met her the next time, I ran into woods, took LSD and got caught by the police. Guess I was the crazy one
cows_are_underrated@feddit.org · 1 pts · 163d
Running into the woods while being on LSD is a banger activity.
vivalapivo@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 163d
I didn't bang that day
Bazell@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 163d
Weed really does magic things.
stupidcasey@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 163d
Can someone explain it to me? I want to know what a horse half way between a tree has to do with medieval Vulcans invading Scandinavia.
cows_are_underrated@feddit.org · 5 pts · 163d
Someone explaining the entire lore of skyrim to me while being stoned as hell just makes them more attractive.
anotherspinelessdem@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 164d
Honestly amazed it took that long, even while high