The people who affected me the most did it in such way that I am grateful they are no longer part of my life. Can't thank myself enough for cutting any ties with them.
Yeah, the question is framed poorly. Not all effects on one’s life are good.
Also, with the (possible) exception of kids who grow up in the foster system, I would argue your parents have the largest effect on your life, good or bad. Whether you recognize it or not.
Unless they have a matching personality, showing a lot of gratitude can easily turn unattractive to most people, because it often comes from a position of insecurity... Have a sense of measure even for gratitude is what I'm saying (but this is very much like a patient advising the doctor, because I'm very gratitude-heavy myself).
Ah, no, just giving a glimpse of my own very subjective perspective, based on a relationship where the language of gratitude was decidedly a one-sided affair: neither appreciated nor reciprocated by the other.
I obviously don't know your situation, knew even less before you mentioned ten years, and know less still about the situation of other people reading this conversation, so this was a general comment. We can sometimes miss the fact that other people have completely different interpretations of things that seem almost axiomatic to us.
A few years ago I gushed in a DM to a dj/YouTuber who is the foundation of my music taste. I watched a ton of his hip-hop sample breakdowns when I was a kid
My ex wife subjected me to over a decade of emotional, verbal, physical, and sexual abuse. I spent our entire marriage feeling trapped, that I had to hold it together “for the sake of the kids,” and that I had no alternatives. Eventually I imploded, ended up institutionalized, and she used the situation to convince every one of her friends and mine that she was the victim.
If I had the chance today, I’d thank her with several applications of a crowbar to her temple.
20 Comments
AbsolutelyNotAVelociraptor@piefed.social · 31 pts · 113d
The people who affected me the most did it in such way that I am grateful they are no longer part of my life. Can't thank myself enough for cutting any ties with them.
dylanmorgan@slrpnk.net · 5 pts · 113d
Yeah, the question is framed poorly. Not all effects on one’s life are good.
Also, with the (possible) exception of kids who grow up in the foster system, I would argue your parents have the largest effect on your life, good or bad. Whether you recognize it or not.
tanisnikana@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 113d
Occasionally I’ll tell my wife thanks for marrying me. I’m a very gratitude-heavy sort of person. If I’m grateful, they’ll know it.
NoSpotOfGround@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 113d
Unless they have a matching personality, showing a lot of gratitude can easily turn unattractive to most people, because it often comes from a position of insecurity... Have a sense of measure even for gratitude is what I'm saying (but this is very much like a patient advising the doctor, because I'm very gratitude-heavy myself).
tanisnikana@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 113d
Wait wait wait, hold on a second, are you explaining to me, how to interact with my own wife? The one I’ve been married to for ten years?
NoSpotOfGround@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 113d
Ah, no, just giving a glimpse of my own very subjective perspective, based on a relationship where the language of gratitude was decidedly a one-sided affair: neither appreciated nor reciprocated by the other.
I obviously don't know your situation, knew even less before you mentioned ten years, and know less still about the situation of other people reading this conversation, so this was a general comment. We can sometimes miss the fact that other people have completely different interpretations of things that seem almost axiomatic to us.
chunes@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 113d
Sounds like you're not married to a psychopath. Congratulations!
username_1@programming.dev · 10 pts · 113d
TwoTiredMice@feddit.dk · 7 pts · 113d
I once wrote 90 % of a thank you letter to a school teacher who
HikingVet@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 113d
Why would I thank my abusers?
CapuccinoCoretto@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 113d
:(
I saw this one coming before I clicked on the post.
glups@piefed.social · 2 pts · 113d
A few years ago I gushed in a DM to a dj/YouTuber who is the foundation of my music taste. I watched a ton of his hip-hop sample breakdowns when I was a kid
gigastasio@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 113d
My ex wife subjected me to over a decade of emotional, verbal, physical, and sexual abuse. I spent our entire marriage feeling trapped, that I had to hold it together “for the sake of the kids,” and that I had no alternatives. Eventually I imploded, ended up institutionalized, and she used the situation to convince every one of her friends and mine that she was the victim.
If I had the chance today, I’d thank her with several applications of a crowbar to her temple.
Dasus@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 112d
Why would I thank them? They ruined my life
gru54777@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 113d
Every day, in my prayers.
chunes@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 113d
Mr. Rogers died 23 years ago, unfortunately.
hanrahan@slrpnk.net · 1 pts · 112d
No way I am thanking Trump as the person who affected me the most.
Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 113d
I thank my husband dozens of times per day, and vice versa
Malyca@lemmy.zip · 0 pts · 111d
I thank him every day
Goldholz@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 0 pts · 113d
Yesterday. And almost every day
Crackhappy@lemmy.world · -1 pts · 113d
I never ask questions like this until I am satisfied with my own answer.