edit: I showed my wife the comments on this post and she said "I like that everyone is agreeing with me."
I still love the monkey. Oh, and the wife.
My wife hates this. I love it.
edit: I showed my wife the comments on this post and she said "I like that everyone is agreeing with me."
I still love the monkey. Oh, and the wife.
56 Comments
toynbee@piefed.social · 22 pts · 94d
I got it from Good Will. There are three things I got there that my wife hates and I love. I don't have an antagonistic relationship with her in general, but those three things were items I needed.
I'm willing to yield on almost everything else, but how can you say no to a creepy coconut monkey?
Crackhappy@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 94d
No
toynbee@piefed.social · 17 pts · 94d
You're clearly a stronger person than I.
Crackhappy@lemmy.world · -2 pts · 94d
Personal preference over matrimonial harmony. It's a bit of a no-brainer, yes?
toynbee@piefed.social · 17 pts · 94d
If I really thought this would upset my wife, I wouldn't have gotten it. I sometimes enjoy when we play the game of annoying each other, but if I thought something would genuinely upset her, I wouldn't do it. Teasing is fun for both participants. Actually being a jerk, less so.
Crackhappy@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 94d
You're an excellent spouse. Sorry for the over analysis.
toynbee@piefed.social · 6 pts · 94d
Thank you for saying so. There is no need to apologize.
Valmond@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 94d
No.
Valmond@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 17 pts · 94d
You can keep it, but like in a closet 😁.
Pro tip: don't wish for things near it.
toynbee@piefed.social · 7 pts · 94d
I have yet to show this to anyone who doesn't respond by calling it something equivalent to "cursed." That fact really makes me wonder about the original sculpturist.
Valmond@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 8 pts · 94d
It IS the sculpturist...
Martineski@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 93d
I don't get everyone calling it cursed. It looks very cute to me. Lol
bedwyr@piefed.ca · 1 pts · 94d
I was trying to paste an image of The Simpsons Olmec head given to Bart as a gift from Mr Burns, it won't let me a glitch or maybe that saw this community works. Here's a clip. Never mind, the internet is so enshitified I can't get the clip, what the fuck is going on with the internet.
nightofmichelinstars@sopuli.xyz · 13 pts · 94d
Your wife is a wise woman.
Fizz@lemmy.nz · 13 pts · 94d
You can keep it but you're gonna get cursed
toynbee@piefed.social · 13 pts · 94d
Oh, of course. That's the point.
Fizz@lemmy.nz · 5 pts · 94d
Nice, I look forward to viewing the found footage film once the spooky events start going down.
Sergio@piefed.social · 9 pts · 94d
Do you work at a desk in an office? You can keep it there, and then if someone comes in to talk to you, you can lean in to the monkey as if to listen to its whispers, and say "Monkey doesn't like that idea!" Lean in again. "Monkey is getting upset! You should go now. Bad things happen when Monkey gets upset..."
Zahille7@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 94d
Bonus points of you do a funny voice
Zahille7@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 94d
I feel like if it weren't for the teeth it would be bearable
SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 93d
Oh fuck i didn't notice the damn teeth....
Blackout@fedia.io · 7 pts · 94d
She probably doesn't like it cause it looks like timothee chalamet. That's why I don't like it
pastermil@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 94d
That looks cursed.
toynbee@piefed.social · 6 pts · 94d
That's why she hates it! The teeth, especially, I think.
Aviandelight@mander.xyz · 2 pts · 94d
Yup, for me it's the teeth too. Without those it would be cute.
toynbee@piefed.social · 2 pts · 94d
I showed my wife the comments and she said (among other things) that she agrees the teeth are the worst part. She doesn't like that they "don't look like teeth," they make it look like "a monkey who eats teeth."
pastermil@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 94d
Fuck that. With the teeth it can look goofy. Without, it would look absolutely diabolical!
BagOfHeavyStones@piefed.social · 5 pts · 94d
Perhaps give it a baseball cap, a kids piano and some fancy lighting.
Or a manicure...💅
NaibofTabr@infosec.pub · 5 pts · 94d
Well, there's no accounting for taste.
toynbee@piefed.social · 8 pts · 94d
True, I could never account for why my wife seems to like me.
teslekova@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 94d
The wonky nostrils add character.
Gerblat@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 94d
Wonky Nostrils new band name I called it
YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 93d
I feel like this is the first of three posts that end with you needing the services of a shaman.
massive_bereavement@fedia.io · 3 pts · 94d
Did the vendor's shop disappear once you went back to return?
toynbee@piefed.social · 3 pts · 94d
No, they were just twenty feet to the left.
massive_bereavement@fedia.io · 2 pts · 94d
Oh, so then the well willing Good Will cashier gave you a warning, and told you to pick something else but you insisted, and now you're bound forever. What becomes of "it", shall become of you, kind of thing?
Drusas@fedia.io · 2 pts · 93d
Back in, like, the late '90s, these things were everywhere.
So to me they're just perfectly banal.
JennaR8r@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 93d
What exactly is it? And why were they ubiquitous in the 90s?
Drusas@fedia.io · 2 pts · 91d
It's just a decorative item shaped like a monkey, usually made of coconuts.
JennaR8r@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 91d
and, um, human teeth
Drusas@fedia.io · 1 pts · 89d
Not the ones I saw.
toynbee@piefed.social · 2 pts · 93d
I grew up in the nineties and never saw one before this. Maybe it was regional?
bedwyr@piefed.ca · 2 pts · 94d
I think it is cute, it is kind eyes.
dusty_raven@discuss.online · 2 pts · 93d
I too love it. I would keep it on a stand next to the door and rub its head for luck.
In 3 years my wife would win it on the divorce (specifically because I would spend hours in the middle of the night rubbing its head and muttering to myself) and set fire to it in an act of rebellion.
The smoke released from the fire would take the form of a dark specter and haunt the world for 5000 years.
Or I would just keep it on the shelf and enjoy having something that I can tease my wife with. d:
toynbee@piefed.social · 1 pts · 93d
When I pass, I shall bequeath it to you so you may make that choice.
Tiral@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 94d
If it starts moving around at night, that's when you nope out.
toynbee@piefed.social · 1 pts · 94d
Strongly agreed on that!
UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 94d
Splendid
RBWells@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 93d
Yeah I hate it and not even going to show it to my husband, he would be looking to buy one.
TheGiantKorean@lemmy.today · 1 pts · 94d
Have you ever watched Trilogy of Horror?
toynbee@piefed.social · 1 pts · 94d
I haven't.
TheGiantKorean@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 94d
Sorry, *Terror not Horror.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nMXo_moi5x8
Skip to the last 5 min of you want. Just reminds me of it for some reason.
prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 93d
Why does this look like a screenshot from a PlayStation 3 game? lol
xenomor@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 94d
Sounds like a Roy Rogers wagon wheel coffee table situation.
Tedesche@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 94d
But do you love it because she hates it?
toynbee@piefed.social · 2 pts · 94d
In part.