You're the only carpenter in town.

520 points · 17 comments · view on lemmy.world

17 Comments

StarvingMartist@sh.itjust.works · 69 pts · 99d (4 replies)

I think it would be funny to make a game called jesus simulator, and it's all just about carpentry in Jerusalem as Jesus

Like, no mention of religion at all, just a really solid carpentry simulator

grranibal@lemmy.zip · 17 pts · 99d

I’m not much into simulators but that looks super fun

cyrano@piefed.social · 8 pts · 98d (1 reply)
Akasazh@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 98d

Wow.

Phantaloons@piefed.zip · 7 pts · 98d

"Damnit, Dale, this is the bronze age. Quit using copper nails. These people deserve craftsmanship."

AnthropomorphicCat@lemmy.world · 30 pts · 98d

Reminds me of that Twitter thread:

What would be Jesus' favorite gun?

A nail gun!

That's NOT funny.

Why not? He was a carpenter.

dufkm@lemmy.world · 23 pts · 98d (1 reply)

He's obviously annoyed because the Client didn't specify all dimensions needed to build what they think they want, so he knows he's in for a world of pain when he has to discuss what the original Scope of Work was after he's done and they're dissatisfied. I'm sorry, Jesus.

OozingPositron@feddit.cl · 8 pts · 98d

It doesn't even have the symmetry line.

AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space · 14 pts · 98d (1 reply)

I wonder if, as he was being nailed up, some part of his attention was devoted to critiquing the carpentry of the cross.

UnimportantHuman@lemmy.ml · 6 pts · 98d

He definitely did. everyone I know who's worked in a field at least similar is like this lol

mystik@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 98d

"Oh, and we're gonna need you to carry it up to Calvary for us too, k?"

LionofJudah2026@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 98d

I laughed, Hi Guys!

Jesus enjoying life as a carpenter

0:03

0:13 “Yeshua”

JennaR8r@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 98d (3 replies)

Interesting if jesus's wingspan was 5 ft, that means he was also 5 ft tall.

The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 98d

I would probably start a religion about a guy with wings too.

Dicska@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 98d

Something is telling me they weren't really into bespoke cross-making. Once it's long (wide) enough, it can accommodate anyone from 7'3" giants to kids.

SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 98d

Probably in the right ballpark

hallettj@leminal.space · 2 pts · 97d

IIRC in the movie The Last Temptation of Christ making crosses is kinda his thing