I think it's funny when average women who normally have no issue finding guys suddenly have no idea how to do the hard work of getting with another woman.
I found the number of women that would actually send a message was perhaps one in ten. A chunk would just let the match expire, the others would send either one of the Gif options, or "hey".
Half of them had an identical account on Tinder anyway.
Yeah I get that. A lot of (male) matches on bumble didnât engage with me either after I sent a message. Iâm not a wordsmith by any means but I always tried to mention something I saw in their profile and ask a question. I figured if anything it showed a bit of effort as a minimum. Never tried tinder.
Interesting that men are pretty bad as well, I had a similar approach to you, try and mention something in their profile. It's part of the reason I think Hinge is the best of the apps right now.
I treated internet dating as a numbers game. Hard to get too upset about someone initially just not responding. It would feel more personal to me when we would be talking for a bit and they would just ghost. Your comparison is fair, people put varying levels of effort into their relationships in general.
I get called sexist for this, but I think this is basically the reason catfish scams work so easily on older women. When a man comes out of nowhere acting interested in you its just normal. Been a bit rare lately, but it doesnt immediately invoke suspicion.
When i get a message on any platform from a woman, especially unprompted, I immediately ignore it. So often now to the point that they're as invisible as popup ads.
Yeah, I've got a pretty good idea of when someone is completely out of my league, and when I get contacted out of the blue like that, I'm immediately suspicious.
Look at it from the other side: it worked for people who wanted the kind of relationship where women aren't the ones being chased and set a more even ground.
The problem is that it is a for profit business and the proportion of such relationship seekers is small. More women just like being chased... Bumbe is still around, they didn't fail, but they had to let this model go, because they wanted more profit.
One of the funniest things is watching women who talk down to guys having trouble dating women by calling them ugly, insufferable, or creepy, only for them to struggle just as much, if not more, to do the same.
True, but even in dating apps where you can easily access individuals in this demographic, they still struggle. Women in general are just extremely more selective than men. Gay men, for example, don't have this issue.
I have no idea what it's about, but they do have great memes.
I got a new phone recently, and it started from fresh with all the cookies being unrelated to my accounts and such. The pushed content started out with random shit, but a few days in it started revolving around things that involves anti-social women.
I embrace it. I think it's wonderful content, so it keeps feeding me strange stuff that women do when they're not just showing boobs for likes on YouTube.
It's nerdy types doing nerdy stuff.
I find it interesting to see what young women actually do. Mostly because I'm not a young woman. I do have daughters though. I'm waiting for them to revolt on me, but they aren't. They somehow know that we are in this together and that I will support them in every step.
In my experience, it depends on if they genuinely hate all men or not. When you see the opposite gender as an enemy you need to defeat, you stop seeing them as people. From there, it's easy to apply that toxicity to other people of your gender that you see as traitors to your cause. You start to judge everyone by their adherence to gender roles, even if you see yourself as smarter than others who uphold the patriarchy. That is the nature of an incel regardless of if their gender.
That said, I anecdotally find that sapphics are rarely incels, even if they get no bitches. It's easier to not be consumed by your resentment of men when you don't even need date them (note, that this is distinctly different from political lesbians who are only sapphic for ideological reasons; those people are trash). Even if one casually thinks all men are trash, they aren't forced into conflict with men unless those men approach them first. I suspect it's the same with gay men who are lonely; even when they are misogynistic, it's not as much of a problem.
Youâre right, but it really depends on a few factors, such as whoâs saying it, what type of person they are, if theyâre addressing a particular person or a class of people, and so on.
Anyway, Iâm out, there is shit to do in the land of grass and trees.
Geez - you're out to give bitterness a new low, aren't you? I mean... I get it if you're a victim, but you're spitting bullets at virtually everybody you see without regard â even you ought to be able to see it's going a bit too far.
Youre just sad. Youre making up this story in your head about who I am and why Im making fun of you, and youre sitting there like some kind of knight in shining armor that made a mountain out of a mole hill.
I know women who relished it. And others who can laugh off stupidity! And then some who don't like it. My mom never liked it, although she said son of a bitch a lot.
I've always wondered what kind of person is on the other side of these comments, I imagine it's someone that everybody in their life finds them unpleasant
81 Comments
sixtoe@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 64 pts · 70d
This is such a sick burn. Juicy!
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 61 pts · 70d
This is so depressing for some reason. Even women can't get a date with women.
On the other hand, I at least don't need to đ
Town@lemmy.zip · 34 pts · 70d
I think it's funny when average women who normally have no issue finding guys suddenly have no idea how to do the hard work of getting with another woman.
Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works · 20 pts · 70d
It's because they're not used to doing any work whatsoever.
Seriously, the reason bumble failed was women simply will not send a message.
Jessicat@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 70d
It worked for me :) Found my awesome husband there. Agreed though, there are definitely women who expect to be pursued.
Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 70d
I found the number of women that would actually send a message was perhaps one in ten. A chunk would just let the match expire, the others would send either one of the Gif options, or "hey".
Half of them had an identical account on Tinder anyway.
Jessicat@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 70d
Yeah I get that. A lot of (male) matches on bumble didnât engage with me either after I sent a message. Iâm not a wordsmith by any means but I always tried to mention something I saw in their profile and ask a question. I figured if anything it showed a bit of effort as a minimum. Never tried tinder.
Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 70d
Interesting that men are pretty bad as well, I had a similar approach to you, try and mention something in their profile. It's part of the reason I think Hinge is the best of the apps right now.
Jessicat@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 70d
I havenât been dating online since 2021 so I canât really comment on the current scene ^.^ I hope it treats you well!
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 5 pts · 70d
People are THAT bad?
I put more effort in a new friend.
And I am like, disabled.
Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 70d
Yeah, it's pretty grim.
Jessicat@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 70d
I treated internet dating as a numbers game. Hard to get too upset about someone initially just not responding. It would feel more personal to me when we would be talking for a bit and they would just ghost. Your comparison is fair, people put varying levels of effort into their relationships in general.
SeductiveTortoise@piefed.social · 1 pts · 70d
That worked for me on ICQ, 24 years ago.
ImminentOrbit@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 70d
Worked for me, too! Though, my (now) wife had paid for the subscription so she had bonus features.
Willy@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 70d
I bet she still has bonus features!
yermaw@sh.itjust.works · 8 pts · 69d
I get called sexist for this, but I think this is basically the reason catfish scams work so easily on older women. When a man comes out of nowhere acting interested in you its just normal. Been a bit rare lately, but it doesnt immediately invoke suspicion.
When i get a message on any platform from a woman, especially unprompted, I immediately ignore it. So often now to the point that they're as invisible as popup ads.
Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 69d
Yeah, I've got a pretty good idea of when someone is completely out of my league, and when I get contacted out of the blue like that, I'm immediately suspicious.
PieMePlenty@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 70d
Look at it from the other side: it worked for people who wanted the kind of relationship where women aren't the ones being chased and set a more even ground.
The problem is that it is a for profit business and the proportion of such relationship seekers is small. More women just like being chased... Bumbe is still around, they didn't fail, but they had to let this model go, because they wanted more profit.
poolitzer@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 70d
Out of curiosity, what do you mean with failed? Isn't it around and kicking?
LwL@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 69d
Iirc they removed the "women have to message first" requirement some time last month.
Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 70d
It's around, but I don't think the number of users is anything to brag about.
edible_funk@sh.itjust.works · -1 pts · 69d
4 comments to misogyny, y'all giving reddit a run for their money.
NeilNuggetstrong@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 70d
Why are you gae
WhoIzDisIz@lemmy.today · 9 pts · 70d
Why do you ask? Do you speak Gaelic?
NeilNuggetstrong@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 70d
What's a gae lic?
captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 70d
What I did to your mom
sukhmel@programming.dev · 4 pts · 70d
Something something rainbow, definitely
Gorilladrums@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 70d
One of the funniest things is watching women who talk down to guys having trouble dating women by calling them ugly, insufferable, or creepy, only for them to struggle just as much, if not more, to do the same.
SealofLove@leminal.space · 17 pts · 70d
To be fair, it's much harder to find a woman who's also attracted to women. Much smaller pool to choose from.
Gorilladrums@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 70d
True, but even in dating apps where you can easily access individuals in this demographic, they still struggle. Women in general are just extremely more selective than men. Gay men, for example, don't have this issue.
bitjunkie@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 69d
It's having a hard time pulling vs. having a hard time finding someone who is relationship material, regardless of orientation.
bridgeburner@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 70d
Because u are gay?
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 70d
I wish, nope. I am like too miserable to care about dating đ
I just don't feel the desperate or need to partner, because I have more immediate suffering.
plutopos@lemmy.zip · 53 pts · 70d
Last pride march I went to, my girlfriend was deadset on kissing a girl. That was when we realized, neither of us has any idea how to pull a girl irl
funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works · 68 pts · 70d
captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 26 pts · 70d
Ya ain't wrong
bstix@feddit.dk · 18 pts · 70d
Lincel?
Ziglin@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 70d
I believe here they are mostly found in the !femcelmemes@lemmy.blahaj.zone community.
bstix@feddit.dk · 18 pts · 70d
I have no idea what it's about, but they do have great memes.
I got a new phone recently, and it started from fresh with all the cookies being unrelated to my accounts and such. The pushed content started out with random shit, but a few days in it started revolving around things that involves anti-social women.
I embrace it. I think it's wonderful content, so it keeps feeding me strange stuff that women do when they're not just showing boobs for likes on YouTube. It's nerdy types doing nerdy stuff.
I find it interesting to see what young women actually do. Mostly because I'm not a young woman. I do have daughters though. I'm waiting for them to revolt on me, but they aren't. They somehow know that we are in this together and that I will support them in every step.
hopesdead@startrek.website · 2 pts · 70d
But are they as toxic as their male counterpart?
TotallynotJessica@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 9 pts · 70d
In my experience, it depends on if they genuinely hate all men or not. When you see the opposite gender as an enemy you need to defeat, you stop seeing them as people. From there, it's easy to apply that toxicity to other people of your gender that you see as traitors to your cause. You start to judge everyone by their adherence to gender roles, even if you see yourself as smarter than others who uphold the patriarchy. That is the nature of an incel regardless of if their gender.
That said, I anecdotally find that sapphics are rarely incels, even if they get no bitches. It's easier to not be consumed by your resentment of men when you don't even need date them (note, that this is distinctly different from political lesbians who are only sapphic for ideological reasons; those people are trash). Even if one casually thinks all men are trash, they aren't forced into conflict with men unless those men approach them first. I suspect it's the same with gay men who are lonely; even when they are misogynistic, it's not as much of a problem.
Gorilladrums@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 70d
They often are
ayyy@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 70d
Itâs a very mixed bag from funny trolling to completely unacceptable and debilitating misandry.
velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · -69 pts · 70d
Funny meme about an LGBT+ topic and wlw without resorting to misogyny.
Still uses "Bitches" in the title.
Just couldn't help yourself, could you, OP?
tanisnikana@lemmy.world · 60 pts · 70d
Itâs me, Iâm bitches.
velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · -26 pts · 70d
Thereâs an interesting conversation that could be had about reclaiming slurs and who can use slurs and when they can be used.
Iâd argue men talking about lesbians might wanna refrain from using a slur against women though lol
tanisnikana@lemmy.world · 31 pts · 70d
Who said @absolute_slayer is a man?
velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · -27 pts · 70d
Fair. Could be internalized misogyny thatâs talking.
The meme is funnier without the sexism.
tanisnikana@lemmy.world · 38 pts · 70d
And I think itâs great as-is, and Iâm a woman.
velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · -22 pts · 70d
That doesnât mean calling women âbitchesâ isnât sexist.
tanisnikana@lemmy.world · 29 pts · 70d
Youâre right, but it really depends on a few factors, such as whoâs saying it, what type of person they are, if theyâre addressing a particular person or a class of people, and so on.
Anyway, Iâm out, there is shit to do in the land of grass and trees.
Derpenheim@lemmy.zip · 23 pts · 70d
Wah
velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · -34 pts · 70d
Awww you wanna have a little misogyny as a treat?
Derpenheim@lemmy.zip · 19 pts · 70d
wwwwaaaaah
velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · -25 pts · 70d
Aww wittle boy just wants to be allowed to call women âbitchesâ awwwww itâs just so fucking cute, isnât it?
Just a little sexism as a little treat for a beautiful Sunday like this. Yâknow, because youâve been such a good little boy!
ddplf@szmer.info · 20 pts · 70d
Derpenheim@lemmy.zip · 10 pts · 70d
velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · -13 pts · 70d
Babyâs first selfie! So cute!
WhoIzDisIz@lemmy.today · 14 pts · 70d
Geez - you're out to give bitterness a new low, aren't you? I mean... I get it if you're a victim, but you're spitting bullets at virtually everybody you see without regard â even you ought to be able to see it's going a bit too far.
Derpenheim@lemmy.zip · 13 pts · 70d
Youre just sad. Youre making up this story in your head about who I am and why Im making fun of you, and youre sitting there like some kind of knight in shining armor that made a mountain out of a mole hill.
Starik@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 70d
Is this a troll account?
hakase@lemmy.zip · 12 pts · 70d
Unfortunately velma is both very active and very serious.
velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · -9 pts · 70d
Is it so shocking that women might find the slur âbitchâ offensive?
Dozzi92@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 70d
I know women who relished it. And others who can laugh off stupidity! And then some who don't like it. My mom never liked it, although she said son of a bitch a lot.
bitjunkie@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 69d
And still others have a shred of humor in their body
velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · -10 pts · 70d
Ah I see you participated in mocking a random womanâs appearance this morning here as well.
Stay classy.
Starik@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 70d
The tic tac toe thing? I was just taking my turn!
ddplf@szmer.info · 17 pts · 70d
womp womp
Gorilladrums@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 70d
I've always wondered what kind of person is on the other side of these comments, I imagine it's someone that everybody in their life finds them unpleasant