I was on a multi-week survival camping (no amenities) gathering in the middle of the forest and there was a guy with a perfectly twirled mustache. How vain do you have to be to keep that up under such conditions?
What if you start off one side of the mustache as a twirled one like the image, then the other side is a handle bar, down and along the jaw line, up over the ear and down and around to the bottom middle of the back of the head to a rats tail (with a bald head).
I shaved my chin and weak-ass sideburns so I had a horseshoe moustache. Just as a joke to go show my partner. She said "It's good you should keep it like that". so now I'm a horseshoe moustache man.
This. I shaved my beard down to a moustache because I figured I'd get a laugh. Now I'm buying Hawai'in shirts and white pants to fill out her Magnum PI fantasy.
I'm a guy and have always been of the opinion that my partner is the one that has to look at me the most, so she can dictate how I look if she cares to do so, for the most part, at least.
I always talk with my wife before I do something weird with my facial hair. Like the colonel sanders was fun, but not sustainable in the long term.
But like, imagine getting dumped because you got a haircut. Not a bad haircut, just a haircut. That's how ridiculous some people are about facial hair.
My cats think so. They keep waking me up by nibbling on my face. I'm not sure whether they're being cute or trying to give my wife a hint or hells forbid checking whether I'm alive and trying to eat my face. I've got like ten hours to decide whether to train them out of it
That was when I l left town and my cat sitter had to decide whether to put up with face nibbles. She is not allowed to discipline the cat, the cat is in charge while I am gone
No pluck it a hair at a time then sort it according to length, then call your doctor concerned that your median and mode hair length are not as different as you'd think
IMO the vast majority of men cannot pull off a mustache. In order to pull off a mustache, you need to project competence, authority, and maturity. You absolutely must exude all three without trying. If you're under 30 don't even try. Furthermore, it must look good. Thick, full, groomed. Again, all three required. The percentage of the male identifying population that has all six of those attributes is way lower than what I'm seeing in the wild. If you know someone close to you who is mustachioed but doesn't have the attributes, shave it off. If they're mad, tell them someone deserving of a mustache wouldn't have let that happen.
Edit: your hate for my opinion won't make your mustasche look good
That's because you're old. Like prob an older millenial or genx. Me too, I just roll with the times baby. Nothing wrong with youngsters recycling fashions of yore!
You seen a kid in junco jeans yet, now that is a goddamn trip.
74 Comments
TheTechnician27@lemmy.world · 72 pts · 36d
:[(
A_norny_mousse@piefed.zip · 37 pts · 36d
:}(
snooggums@piefed.world · 10 pts · 36d
: )>
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 35d
: 3)
yucandu@lemmy.world · 53 pts · 36d
Is this the girl equivalent of "so your wife has cut her hair short"?
xcutie@linux.community · 46 pts · 36d
I love your wife's short hair.
yucandu@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 36d
I love your mustache.
87Six@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 35d
I love your wife's hair's moustache
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 35d
I love your mustache's hair's wife
A_norny_mousse@piefed.zip · 1 pts · 35d
What? No! Big difference.
But I'm hard pressed to find one. Maybe shaving your pubic hair heart shaped, or getting ass antlers.
yucandu@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 35d
Ass antlers is new to me. We call that a Tramp Stamp in Canada.
A_norny_mousse@piefed.zip · 1 pts · 34d
Arschgeweih is often used in that judgmental way, too. Personally I think it's just a matter of taste - like moustaches.
A_norny_mousse@piefed.zip · 40 pts · 36d
I was on a multi-week survival camping (no amenities) gathering in the middle of the forest and there was a guy with a perfectly twirled mustache. How vain do you have to be to keep that up under such conditions?
fleem@piefed.zeromedia.vip · 23 pts · 36d
it's an autistic stim
mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca · 14 pts · 36d
I know a few guys that would do something like that in the backcountry as a joke. the challenge is most of the fun.
yucandu@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 36d
Baseball pitchers do it to throw off the batter. I saw a pitcher with a monkey tail beard once.
Brickhead92@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 36d
What if you start off one side of the mustache as a twirled one like the image, then the other side is a handle bar, down and along the jaw line, up over the ear and down and around to the bottom middle of the back of the head to a rats tail (with a bald head).
ripcord@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 36d
That would definitely throw me off
I thought I was the only one that had one
Tomato666@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 35d
I worked with a guy who suggested something similar to this for a Movember growth.
He described it as an asymmetrical moustache.
Can't even contemplate the confidence on pulling it off whist taking public transport.
DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 35d
I had to search "monkey tail beard", and I'm glad I did.
Then there's this guy, he knows this was a mistake.
pugnaciousfarter@literature.cafe · 4 pts · 35d
The moustache was the one keeping him alive .
A_Very_Big_Fan@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 36d
Seconding what the other person said lmao. Mine looked like that for a while because I'd just start fidgeting with it the moment my hands were idle.
shroomato@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 35d
I imagine with all that accumulated grime the mustache collapses into a sticky mess by itself
Zombie@feddit.uk · 28 pts · 36d
yucandu@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 36d
source?
Zombie@feddit.uk · 12 pts · 36d
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Super_Troopers
grahamja@reddthat.com · 2 pts · 35d
You're going to be asking what a Z job is next. You can't afford it.
bluesquid0741b@aussie.zone · 22 pts · 35d
I shaved my chin and weak-ass sideburns so I had a horseshoe moustache. Just as a joke to go show my partner. She said "It's good you should keep it like that". so now I'm a horseshoe moustache man.
tmyakal@infosec.pub · 13 pts · 35d
This. I shaved my beard down to a moustache because I figured I'd get a laugh. Now I'm buying Hawai'in shirts and white pants to fill out her Magnum PI fantasy.
Smaile@lemmy.ca · 4 pts · 35d
Asking your partner what they like is often the way to go. respect in the relaationship is always a 2 way street as are boundrys.
joyjoy@piefed.social · 17 pts · 36d
looks like one of the Carlin brothers.
CuriousRefugee@discuss.tchncs.de · 2 pts · 36d
This was my first thought, too!
kibblebits@quokk.au · 16 pts · 36d
He’s better off without her and her mother.
akwd169@sh.itjust.works · 16 pts · 36d
Joelk111@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 36d
I'm a guy and have always been of the opinion that my partner is the one that has to look at me the most, so she can dictate how I look if she cares to do so, for the most part, at least.
DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 35d
My now-ex wife wanted me to grow a goatee. I've always been clean-shaven. I tried it for a few weeks, hated it, and shaved it off.
Also, she wouldn't shave where I wanted her to...
strawberry_enjoyer42@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 14 pts · 35d
Wow, I didn't realise I was such a minority.
I think men look wayyy better with facial hair: moustaches, full beard, two-weeks of stubble; anything, really.
pugnaciousfarter@literature.cafe · 6 pts · 35d
"I am changing the terms of our unspoken agreement"
I am sure there's many who feel the same when hubbies shave 🪒.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 35d
I always talk with my wife before I do something weird with my facial hair. Like the colonel sanders was fun, but not sustainable in the long term.
But like, imagine getting dumped because you got a haircut. Not a bad haircut, just a haircut. That's how ridiculous some people are about facial hair.
0x0@lemmy.zip · 5 pts · 35d
If A dumps B over a haircut, A doesn't deserve B.
strawberry_enjoyer42@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 35d
oh, i dont have a partner lol
im just an admirer :3
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 35d
Wait I thought... 👉👈
Your partner is our lord and savior and this week's sponsor Crelm Toothbrush Concern. As is all of ours.
strawberry_enjoyer42@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 35d
Oh right you're the person who I got shipped with in a femcel comment thread!
...
I bet you're pretty cute.HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 35d
My cats think so. They keep waking me up by nibbling on my face. I'm not sure whether they're being cute or trying to give my wife a hint or hells forbid checking whether I'm alive and trying to eat my face. I've got like ten hours to decide whether to train them out of it
strawberry_enjoyer42@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 34d
Why ten hours?
Also, I am sooo glad my cat doesn't do that lol. She's a good kitty :3
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 34d
That was when I l left town and my cat sitter had to decide whether to put up with face nibbles. She is not allowed to discipline the cat, the cat is in charge while I am gone
cosmos8188@leminal.space · 2 pts · 35d
There is no need to compare minorities in terms of preferences. You either like it or not. Its the same with tattoos and other things.
strawberry_enjoyer42@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 34d
Oh for sure, I just find it interesting, that's all.
I just like guys with beards :3
cosmos8188@leminal.space · 2 pts · 34d
Yeah, fair enough. To be fair, I find some bearded guys (on the odd time) to be good looking.
tristynalxander@mander.xyz · 13 pts · 36d
Stamau123@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 36d
The obvious solution is to gaslight him into believing he doesn't have a moustache https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Moustache_%28film%29?wprov=sfla1
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 35d
I need to watch this
Siethron@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 36d
I have full facial hair, where does that fall on on this concept?
ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 36d
You have to shave it tonight. All of it.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 35d
No pluck it a hair at a time then sort it according to length, then call your doctor concerned that your median and mode hair length are not as different as you'd think
0x0@lemmy.zip · 5 pts · 35d
If she doesn't trim i can see the velcro effect creating a problem...
Million@lemmy.zip · 5 pts · 35d
My SO has never seen me IRL without a full on beard.
And we are nearing 10 years together.
Smaile@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 35d
Yah it's just a little overblown cuz it's online meme comic, nothing to take overly serious
Tollana1234567@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 35d
viltrumites.
GhostFace@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 35d
Shave it while he sleeps.
Smaile@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 35d
Def a healthy relationship dinamic here lul
Palerider@feddit.uk · 2 pts · 36d
Olive. 1997.
joelfromaus@aussie.zone · 2 pts · 34d
My front teeth are crooked. I was quoted $7,500 for braces. The moustache is free and pulls attention away from my teeth.
I would rather have straight teeth.
schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 36d
Dogyote@slrpnk.net · -16 pts · 35d
IMO the vast majority of men cannot pull off a mustache. In order to pull off a mustache, you need to project competence, authority, and maturity. You absolutely must exude all three without trying. If you're under 30 don't even try. Furthermore, it must look good. Thick, full, groomed. Again, all three required. The percentage of the male identifying population that has all six of those attributes is way lower than what I'm seeing in the wild. If you know someone close to you who is mustachioed but doesn't have the attributes, shave it off. If they're mad, tell them someone deserving of a mustache wouldn't have let that happen.
Edit: your hate for my opinion won't make your mustasche look good
BuboScandiacus@mander.xyz · 22 pts · 35d
This is false. You can wear a mustache if you want, you don’t need permission from Dogyote.
Dogyote@slrpnk.net · -5 pts · 35d
Sure, you can, but odds are you look like an idiot
mig@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 35d
I see you haven't hung around a military base recently. These teenagers and early 20s all got 1970s staches. Mustaches are back, baby!
Dogyote@slrpnk.net · -1 pts · 35d
Seeing teens and those in their early 20s with a mustache always makes me chuckle. It doesn't work on a fresh, wrinkle-free face.
cosmos8188@leminal.space · 4 pts · 35d
I mean its your opinion, nothing wrong with that - just dont go rubbing it on other peoples faces.
Dogyote@slrpnk.net · 0 pts · 35d
If I'm forced to see it then I'm going to complain about it in a relevant lemmy thread.
mig@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 34d
That's because you're old. Like prob an older millenial or genx. Me too, I just roll with the times baby. Nothing wrong with youngsters recycling fashions of yore!
You seen a kid in junco jeans yet, now that is a goddamn trip.
Dogyote@slrpnk.net · 2 pts · 34d
Yeah I'm old relative to these kids, but I guarantee the vast majority are someday going to look back and wonder what the hell they were thinking.
DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 35d
Wait, you're suggesting that people forcibly shave another man's mustache?
I mean, it's wrong, but... I'd watch.
Also, I'm sorry so few people caught that this is satire.