its basically i regret not transitioning sooner, but my biggest regret is wasting so much time acting like an introvert. i spent so much time at home doing stuff basically to pass the time rather than going out and taking social risks. i could have been doing everything i dreamed of that whole time even if it was scary. maybe i would have found myself sooner if i did idk. but im not sure i would have been able to before i started transitioning.
Not letting fear run your life was my uncle's dying advice to me. He spent years not doing things because of fear. He didn't want me to do the same since we're very similar. This year I left everyone and everything I knew behind, drove 16 hours, and started a new life with someone I met on discord. Probably not exactly what he meant but, it's the first time I've felt like I'm free to be myself.
Proud of you friend, you're doing it. Better late than never!
Cycling always felt like something I should enjoy, but I just never found that spark. I used to ride a lot when I was in the office 5 days a week, but aside from my commute, I never touched the bike.
Staying wayyy to long not in one but two toxic relationships. I guess low self-esteem and fear of being alone will do that to a gal.
I would also put "not transitioning earlier" but... ok I am not sure if this is a controversal/kinda woo-woo esoteric take but I honestly believe that if I had known earlier that I am trans, I would have died. Either because the region I grew up in being infested with Nazi scum would have gotten me or ... well myself for knowing, not being able to do anything about it for years and years and seeing me turn into this grotesque form that should have never been.
So yeah. I think my brain was protecting me from that. Unfortunately I plunged myself into that second toxic relationship, got married and then it was almost constant stress too, so apparently that didn't feel safe for my brain either. Even tho looking back I could have done it, I think... well, what are ten years huh? (a lot, it's a fucking lot and I am slightly salty)
Your feelings are valid. One of the best things I ever read that makes me more at peace with my past self is "you did the best you could at the time with the knowledge and resources you had. If you had better knowledge and better resources, you would've done better. But you didn't, so you couldn't." And that allows me to give past me a lot more grace. Could I be further ahead? IDK. I made the choices I made with the knowledge I had and I'm here now.
I regret the man I chose to father my child. He left me to flounder during the baby years and I should've known from previous experience that he would do so. It almost killed me.
It's one of those situations that I try to give my past self grace for because my son is amazing and I didn't have the strength and knowledge then that I do now.
Honestly… really…being born. You know that scene in Love through a prism where the world is gray for her at all times? Thats how I have experienced life for decades. Therapy doesn’t fix it, and medicine doesn’t abate it. Every once in a while I see or smell something that gives me a fleeting joy. But it’s just like…you know.
Ohhh. Several. I regret not feeling comfortable enough to ask for help outside of my household when I was young. I regret rushing through college as fast as I could. I had a deep fear of getting stuck in school and accumulating debt. So i got through it as quickly as i could. I now think i might have much better employment prospects if i were to take some more time and take some different courses. Either one of those could have been life changing. Better or worse. It’s hard to say
I cheated on my first long-term boyfriend and I wish I hadn't. I wish I had confidence in myself and what I knew I wanted, confidence that he was not the only one who would love me, the confidence that I wouldn't regret my decision. I missed out on a lot because I did what I thought everyone expected of me, what I was supposed to do. I wish I could impart this knowledge on young people because his mom tried to tell us, but young people think they're different.
27 Comments
Domi@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 27 pts · 11d
I should have transitioned years ago ðŸ˜
Okami_No_Rei@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 9d
Ditto. Wish I knew when I was a teenager. Should've done it in my 20s when I started realizing.
QueenMidna@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 10d
Yeah this one
hildegarde@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 9d
Saaame
TheLeadenSea@sh.itjust.works · 21 pts · 11d
Not fucking telling anyone when i was 12
"oh, but it came out of the blue!"
Shut up, mother
TechieDamien@lemmy.ml · 11 pts · 11d
I feel this one
greatwhitebuffalo41@slrpnk.net · 8 pts · 10d
Sending you and 12 year old you some hugs
applebusch@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 18 pts · 11d
its basically i regret not transitioning sooner, but my biggest regret is wasting so much time acting like an introvert. i spent so much time at home doing stuff basically to pass the time rather than going out and taking social risks. i could have been doing everything i dreamed of that whole time even if it was scary. maybe i would have found myself sooner if i did idk. but im not sure i would have been able to before i started transitioning.
greatwhitebuffalo41@slrpnk.net · 12 pts · 10d
Not letting fear run your life was my uncle's dying advice to me. He spent years not doing things because of fear. He didn't want me to do the same since we're very similar. This year I left everyone and everything I knew behind, drove 16 hours, and started a new life with someone I met on discord. Probably not exactly what he meant but, it's the first time I've felt like I'm free to be myself.
Proud of you friend, you're doing it. Better late than never!
Eskarina@piefed.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 10d
Oh, this hits right into home... Been acting like one too, but was never really convinced I am an introvert. Now it's all so overwhelming..
Funny how transition enables the confidence to finally at least try and deal with this.
ada@piefed.blahaj.zone · 15 pts · 11d
I discovered my love of running way too late!
greatwhitebuffalo41@slrpnk.net · 7 pts · 10d
I've tried several times. I want to love running. I hate it so so much. I'm so glad you found something you love!
AcidBurn@retrofed.com · 5 pts · 10d
Me too. It feels like unpleasant punishment.
Cycling is much more my jam
ada@piefed.blahaj.zone · 5 pts · 10d
Cycling always felt like something I should enjoy, but I just never found that spark. I used to ride a lot when I was in the office 5 days a week, but aside from my commute, I never touched the bike.
AcidBurn@retrofed.com · 2 pts · 10d
AcidBurn@retrofed.com · 12 pts · 11d
Just the one?
If I had to pick a single one, it would be walking alone at night through a city, when I was 19 and not streetwise.
kkj@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 6 pts · 10d
Eesh. Is it insensitive for me to hope that you got mugged?
AcidBurn@retrofed.com · 4 pts · 10d
Duke_Nukem_1990@feddit.org · 11 pts · 11d
Staying wayyy to long not in one but two toxic relationships. I guess low self-esteem and fear of being alone will do that to a gal.
I would also put "not transitioning earlier" but... ok I am not sure if this is a controversal/kinda woo-woo esoteric take but I honestly believe that if I had known earlier that I am trans, I would have died. Either because the region I grew up in being infested with Nazi scum would have gotten me or ... well myself for knowing, not being able to do anything about it for years and years and seeing me turn into this grotesque form that should have never been.
So yeah. I think my brain was protecting me from that. Unfortunately I plunged myself into that second toxic relationship, got married and then it was almost constant stress too, so apparently that didn't feel safe for my brain either. Even tho looking back I could have done it, I think... well, what are ten years huh? (a lot, it's a fucking lot and I am slightly salty)
greatwhitebuffalo41@slrpnk.net · 9 pts · 10d
Your feelings are valid. One of the best things I ever read that makes me more at peace with my past self is "you did the best you could at the time with the knowledge and resources you had. If you had better knowledge and better resources, you would've done better. But you didn't, so you couldn't." And that allows me to give past me a lot more grace. Could I be further ahead? IDK. I made the choices I made with the knowledge I had and I'm here now.
kkj@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 10 pts · 10d
Not buying Bitcoin in 2010 when a friend first told me about it.
KyuubiNoKitsune@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 10d
Yeah, I had a plan on buying like $10 of the top 25 crypto currencies in 2010/2011, but I never got around to it.
velma@sh.itjust.works · 10 pts · 10d
I regret the man I chose to father my child. He left me to flounder during the baby years and I should've known from previous experience that he would do so. It almost killed me.
It's one of those situations that I try to give my past self grace for because my son is amazing and I didn't have the strength and knowledge then that I do now.
Malyca@lemmy.zip · 9 pts · 10d
Bringing my kids into this horror show
velma@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 10d
Ooof, this one hit me in the gut. Me too.
Beth@piefed.social · 8 pts · 10d
Honestly… really…being born. You know that scene in Love through a prism where the world is gray for her at all times? Thats how I have experienced life for decades. Therapy doesn’t fix it, and medicine doesn’t abate it. Every once in a while I see or smell something that gives me a fleeting joy. But it’s just like…you know.
velma@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 9d
My partner has a similar experience of the world. It’s really tough and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I’m glad you’re here.
gingersaffronapricat@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 10d
Ohhh. Several. I regret not feeling comfortable enough to ask for help outside of my household when I was young. I regret rushing through college as fast as I could. I had a deep fear of getting stuck in school and accumulating debt. So i got through it as quickly as i could. I now think i might have much better employment prospects if i were to take some more time and take some different courses. Either one of those could have been life changing. Better or worse. It’s hard to say
Pandantic@midwest.social · 4 pts · 10d
I cheated on my first long-term boyfriend and I wish I hadn't. I wish I had confidence in myself and what I knew I wanted, confidence that he was not the only one who would love me, the confidence that I wouldn't regret my decision. I missed out on a lot because I did what I thought everyone expected of me, what I was supposed to do. I wish I could impart this knowledge on young people because his mom tried to tell us, but young people think they're different.