Think anyone would notice?

1.2k points · 158 comments · view on lemmy.world

158 Comments

pyrflie@lemm.ee · 159 pts · 2y (3 replies)
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Chais@sh.itjust.works · 38 pts · 2y (2 replies)

I guess with the lower temperature they'd be less of a threat.

cm0002@lemmy.world · 43 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Only for the short term, they'll adapt and be stronger than ever

HonkTonkWoman@lemm.ee · 19 pts · 2y

And don’t forget, these aren’t normal gators…

These are meth-fueled Florida gators who are as likely to ban books as they are maul a skier.

The Alps won’t know what hit ‘em.

RojoSanIchiban@lemmy.world · 92 pts · 2y (22 replies)

Then I'd be an E.U. citizen? Fuck yeah! Give me two months of vacation!

The_Picard_Maneuver@startrek.website · 186 pts · 2y (5 replies)

My condolences, but Florida immediately voted for Flexit

RojoSanIchiban@lemmy.world · 49 pts · 2y

NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooo!

4am@lemm.ee · 20 pts · 2y

I bet they would if you called it that

DancingIsForbidden@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y (1 reply)
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The_Picard_Maneuver@startrek.website · 8 pts · 2y

But wait, there's more! Order now and we'll throw in the Flexit sleeveless shirt, our patented DIY home tattoo kit, and a 6-week supply of bath salts!

Evilsmiley@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 2y

Watch them join the british commonwealth to help them cope with the decision

papabobolious@feddit.nu · 20 pts · 2y (10 replies)

Sweden here we only get 5 weeks vacay. 480 days parental leave though.

Ghostalmedia@lemmy.world · 30 pts · 2y

People in America and Japan… “‘only’ 5 weeks?!”

KISSmyOS@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y (2 replies)
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Im_old@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 2y (1 reply)

You generally (it depends by country) don't get paid anymore between 6 and 12 months. But you still have a job. So when they get tired of using her womb like clown car, they could back to work. Also is usually (again varies by country) shared parental leave. So between both parents up to the maximum allowance.

Changetheview@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 2y

That’s a good point, but for Sweden, it is indeed 480 paid days. It’s a government calculation related to your income and there is a point (after 390 days) where it drops to the minimum payout, but it is still paid leave.

There are also government-mandated options in Sweden to receive a slightly lower pay in exchange for working fewer hours. I don’t have the exact details here, but it’s something like 75% pay for 75% hours.

Pretty incredible coverage for new parents in that specific country.

This article has a great summary for a lot of European countries’ parental leave laws. And yeah, quite a few are less than a year of paid leave:

https://www.eurodev.com/blog/maternity-leave-europe

Amaltheamannen@lemmy.ml · 7 pts · 2y

Don't forget we don't have a limited amount of days were allowed to be sick either.

Sir_Kevin@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 5 pts · 2y

So, 5 weeks more than we get! That sounds amazing!

skankhunt42@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 2y

Canadian here. I signed a contract with 4weeks of vacation that was changed to 'unlimited' this year. So far I've taken 5 weeks and have a 6th week approved in November.

I haven't used any sick days but they're unlimited. If you take more than 3 in a row, you need a doctors note.

15 weeks parental leave that can be split between partners (father can use none/some/all to look after child while mother goes back to work)

afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y (2 replies)

My state now has mandatory parental leave, about a year after me and my wife had decided that we didn't want more kids. Oh well. At least people in the future will benefit.

Evilsmiley@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 2y (1 reply)

At least youre not the type to try to stop something because you missed the window on benefitting from it

afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

Even if I were it wouldn't apply in this case. Having a society with programs like this in place helps everyone even indirectly. I am fine with greed as long as it goes beyond basic right in front of you.

We all benefit from a better world. Sure some more than others but all at least some.

Rud_1UP@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y (1 reply)

We don't have 2 months vacation..

RojoSanIchiban@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 2y

Or hyperbole, apparently :(

Four weeks, two months, whatever, they're both still infinitely more than Americans are guaranteed, which is zero.

Diprount_Tomato@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y

TimewornTraveler@lemm.ee · 2 pts · 2y

reeeeeee you hate America!!!!!!!!!

RVGamer06@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 2y
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ubermeisters@lemmy.world · 84 pts · 2y (2 replies)
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blanketswithsmallpox@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y (1 reply)

I always figured it was just Gallowbob again lol.

ubermeisters@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
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Colour_me_triggered@lemm.ee · 68 pts · 2y (3 replies)
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qyron@sopuli.xyz · 8 pts · 2y (2 replies)

The mob would have a field day

ScrollerBall@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Nah, the left Sicily where it was.

qyron@sopuli.xyz · 1 pts · 2y

Italy has plenty of mob besides Sicily.

Draghetta@lemmy.world · 65 pts · 2y (9 replies)

So I get rid of the land border with France, but in exchange I get a land border with USA - possibly the only worse country.

Also we lose Sicily and their awesome food and women but we get to keep Sardinia, where the best food is cheese with worms and the best women are one meter tall with moustache.

Bad deal man.

Retrograde@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 2y

And remember you get a border with the worst part of the USA, even better!

1rre@discuss.tchncs.de · 10 pts · 2y (1 reply)

At least there's no Corsica anymore (Sardinia but Fr*nch 🤢)

Draghetta@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y

Fam, corsicans are the only ones who hate French more than us, they are welcome to rejoin Italy whenever they want.

Bel_Shamharoth@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y (3 replies)

So I get rid of the land border with France, but in exchange I get a land border with USA - possibly the only worse country.

We're not going to go to all that trouble just to keep the damn place. You get the worst of both worlds: French Floridians!

i_simp_4_tedcruz@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Sooo... New Orleans?

pseudo@jlai.lu · 2 pts · 2y
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creditCrazy@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

As a effectively Canadian that just moved to Florida zis is tri bone non

Blastasaurus@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Knowing very little about the two islands, I find the contrasting descriptions hilarious.

Draghetta@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y

And don’t you wish you kept knowing very little? Instead… https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casu_martzu

Bloodwoodsrisen@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 63 pts · 2y (7 replies)

Putting the Vatican below the Bible belt is going to be a disaster

HiddenLayer5@lemmy.ml · 21 pts · 2y (3 replies)

Nah most of the bible belt are baptists, evangelicals, and people who don't even believe in Christianity but use it as a cover for their fascist bullshit. There is no universe where they would get along with Catholics. Having them be that close to the Catholics would probably result in another protestant vs catholic war.

frezik@midwest.social · 4 pts · 2y

US Catholics have adapted a lot of the beliefs from the protestant-oriented groups in the US. Try asking Paul Ryan or Rick Santorum if they accept the Vatican's official stance on evolution and watch them squirm. Having the Vatican be right there would be . . . difficult.

Bloodwoodsrisen@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 2y

It would still be a disaster what ever happens. I never said them getting along would cause said disaster

Draghetta@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

Caedite eos. Novit enim Dominus qui sunt eius.

Surdon@lemm.ee · 19 pts · 2y

Nah not really, the catholic church loves going below the belt

Railing5132@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 2y

Well, the Italian government is going full-on neo-fascist, so it'd probably be a wash, but the food would be so much better!

i_simp_4_tedcruz@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y

I'm into it, and I can see mexico and Cuba being into it as well.

Syrc@lemmy.world · 53 pts · 2y (3 replies)

NO GOD PLEASE NO

Being in the EU is like the one good part of the Italian government, if you take that out I guarantee we’ll somehow manage to be even worse neighbors than Florida

where_am_i@sh.itjust.works · 14 pts · 2y

Likewise. Having trump and orban derail EU together is my worst nightmare. Please, keep an eye on your Florida. Don't let it sh1t in my backyard.

MasterNerd@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Counterpoint: I want authentic Italian food

Syrc@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 2y

Then come to Italy (or rather: go to France or Austria near the border so you can enjoy Italian food without actually dealing with living in Italy)

mechoman444@lemmy.world · 50 pts · 2y (2 replies)

I live in Georgia USA I've been to FL way too many times Europe doesn't deserve this.

RGB3x3@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 2y (1 reply)

It's amazing how quickly it turns to shit on I-75 S when you cross the border. You can just feel the nastiness.

mechoman444@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y

Meth production triples in Europe in just weeks of Florida's arrival!

Treczoks@kbin.social · 40 pts · 2y (3 replies)

NOBODY wants Florida.

h3mlocke@lemm.ee · 12 pts · 2y (1 reply)

I grew up in FL and now live in pacific northwest, still not far enough away....

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y

I've never been to Florida. Just the right amount of times

Noodle07@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y

As someone who lives very close to the new florida location I REALLY don't want florida

bad_alloc@feddit.de · 35 pts · 2y (3 replies)

Trade Offer:

You receive: Alligators, Meth

You Give: Debt, Mafia

deaf_fish@lemm.ee · 8 pts · 2y (1 reply)

No one is happy. That is how you know you have reached a compromise.

https://youtu.be/QSlHXbHKp-0?si=ppRCbYf8lJobrigD

PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocks · 2 pts · 2y

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XTornado@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 2y

At least with the Alligators you can negotiate.

robocall@lemmy.world · 34 pts · 2y (2 replies)

No

DarylDutch@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 2y
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DancingIsForbidden@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
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r3df0x@7.62x54r.ru · 29 pts · 2y

Why is Italy a penis?

FARTYSHARTBLAST@kbin.social · 23 pts · 2y (3 replies)

Yes, because the food would be better.

DarkwinDuck@feddit.de · 5 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Fuck you, we're not giving you Italy!

pseudo@jlai.lu · 0 pts · 2y
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IHaveTwoCows@lemm.ee · 2 pts · 2y
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spicytuna62@lemmy.world · 23 pts · 2y (6 replies)

Florida attached to Europe looks mildly like a penis.

Doug@midwest.social · 36 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Florida attached to Europe looks mildly like a penis.

TurnItOff_OnAgain@lemmy.world · 25 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Florida attached to Europe looks mildly like a penis.

ChlorineAddict@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y

You might want to get that checked out

Diprount_Tomato@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Sweden and Finland are literally a penis, balls included

spicytuna62@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 2y

skarn@discuss.tchncs.de · 9 pts · 2y

We don't need that, we already have Scandinavia.

FleetingTit@feddit.de · 21 pts · 2y

Yes! I don't want Florida in europe!

LemmyIsFantastic@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 2y (7 replies)

I really don't know who the biggest losers are in that trade.

afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 2y (3 replies)

Europe. Florida has flying cockroaches.

pseudo@jlai.lu · 2 pts · 2y (2 replies)
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afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y (1 reply)

What part is confusing? They have cockroaches capable of flight. I am still an atheist but if you made me submit a list of arguments for the existence of Satan this would be a bullet point.

ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 2y

Satan punishes bad things, God creates them

orrk@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y

Europe, Italy has some of the best food

ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 2y

Europe, losing part of the mountains will hurt water and weather

tuhriel@discuss.tchncs.de · 4 pts · 2y

Definitely Sicily, they get wiped out in this plan... .

Transcriptionist@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Image Transcription:

White text on a black background reading "I have a plan"

Below the text is two images, the one on the left is of the southeastern coast of America with Italy and Cuba in the location of Florida and its Keys, and the image on the right is that of southern and western Europe with Florida and its Keys in the location of Italy and Cuba.

[I am a human, if I’ve made a mistake please let me know. Please consider providing alt-text for ease of use. Thank you. 💜 We have a community! If you wish for us to transcribe something, want to help improve ease of use here on Lemmy, or just want to hang out with us, join us at !lemmy_scribes@lemmy.world!]

Penta@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y (1 reply)

good human

Transcriptionist@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y

Thank you, fellow human 🤖

BaardFigur@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 2y (7 replies)
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synapse1278@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 2y (6 replies)

Corsica is part of France. But then it begs the question: why did Sardinia moved and not Sicily?

Ataraxia@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 2y

Because we are way better than Mediterranean mexico

tryptaminev@feddit.de · 3 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Because Americans dont know shit about geography.

synapse1278@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

As soon as it is more complex than straight lines and squares, they get confuse.

Rud_1UP@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

That was the first thing I wondered. Where tf did Sicily go.. with its huge Etna vulcano..

BaardFigur@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y (1 reply)
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synapse1278@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

I noticed that after my first comment. The only plausible explanation I can think of is, FLNC wanted to blow up another villa, but they went way over the top with the explosive and blew the whole island up.

buzz86us@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 2y (3 replies)

That would be awesome.. A Mecca for rednecks/Republicans replaced by walkable cities, a nice countryside, vibrant communities, lovely cafes, and awesome pizza. When does the work begin lol

SirHery@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 2y

You take Italy and we sink Florida in the Atlantic. Then it's a deal

Aceticon@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y

Yeah, but the Balkans have enough problems already and don't need that shit.

Maybe make it an island?!

The_Picard_Maneuver@startrek.website · 2 pts · 2y

Florida is already attaching floaties to their beaches. It'll be on the way soon!

YashaB@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Well thank you, but no thank you.

We got enough conservatives as it is.

Sincerely

Your would-be neighbour

icepuncher69@sh.itjust.works · 10 pts · 2y

This is applicable to both of them, WTF.

Honytawk@lemmy.zip · 15 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Well you see, Florida would have to adapt to EU rules or lose all the EU funding.

And we don't tolerate POS like DeSantis.

So give it time, and it will all settle like it is now.

frezik@midwest.social · 12 pts · 2y

You say that, but Berlusconi was Prime Minister of Italy for a long time.

nyoooom@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 2y (4 replies)

Corsica is now under the sea

No_Ones_Slick_Like_Gaston@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y (3 replies)

Have to crack some eggs if you want an omelete.

nyoooom@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Omelette du fromage

Alexstarfire@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y

Llewellyn@lemm.ee · 2 pts · 2y

Didi!!

ubermeisters@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 2y (13 replies)
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Diprount_Tomato@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y (7 replies)

now you're making us deal with that shithole

ubermeisters@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y (6 replies)
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Diprount_Tomato@lemmy.world · -1 pts · 2y (5 replies)

Not Italian.

Also, if you don't know how to do things properly don't complain about it

ubermeisters@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y (4 replies)
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Diprount_Tomato@lemmy.world · -3 pts · 2y (3 replies)

Vinegar is great. Not my fault you can't handle it

ubermeisters@lemmy.world · -2 pts · 2y (2 replies)
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Diprount_Tomato@lemmy.world · -3 pts · 2y

It's not my fault your taste buds have the maturity of those of a 3 year old

afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world · -1 pts · 2y (4 replies)

Texas turns a profit.

Holyginz@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

Until it gets chilly and the power grid shits itself.

ubermeisters@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y (2 replies)
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afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Just factual. Texas pays more taxes than it receives back from the Fed. One of the few states that does.

ubermeisters@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
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Microw@lemm.ee · 12 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Some weird choices there with Sardinia and Sicily

elephantium@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 2y

And Corsica just vanishes

LaVacaMariposa@mander.xyz · 12 pts · 2y

As someone that lives in Florida, would we go over to Europe or do we stay here in the new Italian location?

balderdash9@lemmy.zip · 12 pts · 2y

It's the perfect plan

Diprount_Tomato@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 2y (4 replies)

An absolute downgrade. No sane person would ever want Fl*rida to replace Italy

T00l_shed@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y (3 replies)

I mean if that means Italy would be closer to me, and florida much much further away I think that would make me sane to want to switch.

Diprount_Tomato@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y (2 replies)

And you move that shithole to our continent

T00l_shed@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Dump it in the middle of the pacific?

Diprount_Tomato@lemmy.world · -2 pts · 2y

No, send it straight back to hell, where it belongs

sunnie@sopuli.xyz · 11 pts · 2y

just deleting florida would be better

Jake_Farm@sopuli.xyz · 11 pts · 2y

This made me realize that Florida is a penis.

eager_eagle@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y

now "the florida man who went to malta" will change from a skit into a newspaper headline

kubica@kbin.social · 10 pts · 2y (3 replies)

What if you take them off and forget to put them back?

(Sorry for the affected... maybe)

Belgdore@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Maybe we just stick them together in the middle of the Atlantic?

SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 2y (1 reply)

The best plan.

ChlorineAddict@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

They’ve already got the sinking spirit of Atlantis going.

iamnotdave@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 2y

No one would be able to tell politically but the food would definitely be different.

Kolanaki@yiffit.net · 9 pts · 2y

Italy going from just a boot, to a boot about to kick Cuba's ass.

dangblingus@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 9 pts · 2y (7 replies)

TIL that Florida is basically the same size as Italy. Weird.

Retrograde@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 2y (4 replies)

But oddly Italy is a much more attractive land mass. Florida just looks like a limp dick

15liam20@feddit.uk · 2 pts · 2y (3 replies)

Complete with jap's eye.

i_simp_4_tedcruz@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y (2 replies)

There's got to be a better term dude

Retrograde@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

I'm not speaking for him but you've clearly not been to the UK

Retrograde@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
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AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip · 8 pts · 2y

But italy has a population 3 times higher. And its a place where you actually would want to stay.

Turun@feddit.de · 1 pts · 2y

"basically"

From my rudimentary looking at a map the US would get tiny Italians and we would get 2.5 if not 3m tall Floridians.

SocialMediaRefugee@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y (1 reply)

This sort of thing always makes me think of this Bugs Bunny scene

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xiTM2HQ0g98

PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocks · 2 pts · 2y

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Zyratoxx@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y (3 replies)

Have fun with the Campi Flegrei

hh93@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Why is a shitpost like this the first time I'm reading of this. Why isn't this an issue in european newspapers?

grue@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

Because it's not news until a catastrophic eruption is imminent, I guess? Same reason geological stuff isn't an issue in west coast American newspapers.

Rud_1UP@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

Because it's mostly hyped in pseudo scientific news. Yes it's a super vulcano, there will be some evacuations happening. But no, there will not be a super eruption.

zcd@lemmy.ca · 7 pts · 2y

Just like flushing America’s toilet

LegionEris@feddit.nl · 7 pts · 2y

Gonna find out how much crossover there really is between romance languages.

Cosmicomical@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y

I was about to say that florida can keep their fascist regime, then i remembered that italy is going for a second round as well, so...

SatanicNotMessianic@lemmy.ml · 6 pts · 2y

From America’s wang to Vera Wang in one easy step.

banichan@mastodon.social · 6 pts · 2y

@The_Picard_Maneuver Finally, some good food in Florida that isn't Cuban or Caribbean 😅

rockerface@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 2y

That's one way for Giorno to appear in Stone Ocean

mrlee@kbin.social · 6 pts · 2y

If we need to take Florida, I want Cuba in the Mediterranean Sea as well.

Doug@midwest.social · 6 pts · 2y

Something something Georgia

pleb_maximus@feddit.de · 5 pts · 2y

Probably.

But since Sardinia seems to have folloewd Italy to the Americas and Corsica looks like it vanished, could we get Cuba in their place?

VantaBrandon@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y

I accept your offer

InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y

Looks more phalic

blackkn1ght@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 4 pts · 2y

I love how Sicily doesn't follow the rest of the country

RVGamer06@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
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abbadon420@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Why are you taking Sardinia, but not Sicilia

KazuchijouNo@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 2y

Maybe because Cuba gets in the way smh

Ataraxia@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 2y

Yes leave sicily behind fuck them

Siegfried@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

I like how italy looks like a boot in europe but it becomes a dick in USA

dan1101@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y

I'll take that deal.

FiniteLooper@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y

Neighbors in one will gain good pizza, what Mike the others… not so much

SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 2y

Oh damn. Please.

uis@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

Why Florida looks like d***