What's a funny incorrect use of a word or phrase that always makes you laugh?

38 points · 42 comments · view on lemmy.world

42 Comments

waz@lemmy.world · 29 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Demo is used as an abbreviation for both demonstration and demolition. Usually it's pretty obvious which one is intended, but every time I hear someone say "demo" I try to imagine what kind of chaos would result if the wrong usage was assumed.

Notyou@sopuli.xyz · 9 pts · 2y (1 reply)

"We're having a demo in the break room in five minutes people!"

5 min later

Boom!

"OMG why are there so many dead bodies? I told everyone to stay clear of the break room!"

Valmond@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y

Now lets go to the staff meeting (bring your own staff).

Servais@dormi.zone · 29 pts · 2y (1 reply)

The other day, I heard "Embrace yourself!". Instead of "brace yourself". I think I prefer that version

Chai@lemmy.sdf.org · 3 pts · 2y

Plenty of compassion there, I like it.

owenfromcanada@lemmy.world · 25 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Had a coworker whose first language was not English. His English was good, but some coloquialisms went over his head. At one point, I had to explain the difference between a "butt dial" and a "booty call."

Chai@lemmy.sdf.org · 5 pts · 2y

Down pack instead of down pat. I got it all down pack.

Longpork3@lemmy.nz · 2 pts · 2y

"Ah yes, sorry for call you so late yesterday, was just booty call, no worry"

deadbeef79000@lemmy.nz · 19 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Specific/Pacific.

You have to be Pacific.

You mean specific?

Yeah, that's what I said: Pacific.

In my family we now call it the Specific Ocean.

BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y

My coworker says pacifically where she means specifically.

Chai@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 2y

I thought specific was what I heard on TV as a child, until I came across the spelling somewhere.

No_Eponym@lemmy.ca · 17 pts · 2y

It's a doggy dog world.

andrew_s@piefed.social · 17 pts · 2y (3 replies)

These are usually eggcorns

Anyway, there was once a joke on Friends, where - to massively paraphrase - Joey said 'the point is moo ... not even the cows care about it'. I sometimes use 'moo' instead of 'moot' just 'cos it amuses me.

owenfromcanada@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y

My wife and I will sometimes tell each other "your point is moo" when we disagree on something, and if they insist we just start mooing at each other.

DrinkMonkey@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 2y

‘Cause it a-moooses you?

theOneTrueSpoon@feddit.uk · 2 pts · 2y

"It's like, a cow's opinion. It's moo!"

alyth@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y
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shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee · 9 pts · 2y (3 replies)

My friend used to go to the store and ask the clerk if they had any cosmopolitan ice cream.

Kolanaki@yiffit.net · 4 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Similarly, I like when I hear someone ask for Napoleon ice cream.

"You'll have to try invading Russia during the winter for that flavor."

shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 2y (1 reply)

In Soviet Russia, ice cream screams for you.

Reddfugee42@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

while pounding on your door at 3am

Pat_Riot@lemmy.today · 9 pts · 2y (3 replies)

I had a boss one time that would say "feast or fathom" instead of "feast or famine".

Chai@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 2y (2 replies)

I find that cute!

Pat_Riot@lemmy.today · 5 pts · 2y (1 reply)

You would till it's overtime you don't want to put in.

Chai@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 2y

Yeah in that context, I have to agree.

orangeNgreen@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y (2 replies)

This might not be exactly what you’re asking, but my daughter calls marshmallows “marsh pillows.” And they will now forever be marsh pillows to me.

BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y

I will also call them that now.

BilboBargains@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

My Diabetus Pillow

ReeferPirate@lemy.lol · 5 pts · 2y

Rickyisms. Water under the fridge, worst case Ontario etc.

DrinkMonkey@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 2y

During a cycling workout, the instructor said “our destination is breathless” as a motivator to really push hard. I thought she said “our destination is breakfast” and honestly, I prefer my version.

nevetsg@aussie.zone · 4 pts · 2y (3 replies)

I love singing love songs and replacing the word You with Poo

lemmy_get_my_coat@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y (2 replies)

Same here, and me with wee

nevetsg@aussie.zone · 2 pts · 2y (1 reply)

Which makes The Last Goodnight's song Pictures Of You so much fun to listen to.

lemmy_get_my_coat@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

I've definitely had a chuckle listening to that song

Wanderer@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 2y

My Polish mate, who's English was pretty good but still had a noticeable Polish accent, was asking me about some weird pronunciation of a word or I corrected him in something.

He said "Ah Potato, Tomato. Doesn't matter". I burst out laughing, some guy actually tried to correct him on it.

I also like "We will burn that bridge when we get to it".

alyth@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y (3 replies)
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DigitalDruid@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 2y (1 reply)
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BilboBargains@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y

Language is the only thing in the universe that has meaning.

Jaffa@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y

I had to look up what was wrong with it and still it seems like a very minor difference. But hey, I spend my time playing video games, who am I to judge what is worthy of one's time.

WindyRebel@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y

Nip it in the butt.

It’s nip it in the bud, bud.

Reddfugee42@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
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Feelfold@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y

"Very unique"

"My work" when referencing a place of business.

These less make my laugh than cry though.

MadBob@feddit.nl · 1 pts · 2y

I'm a Briton living in the Netherlands; I've lost count.

corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 2y

'Emails'. Except it's a mean laughter and I wish they would stop.

renrenPDX@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y

Go watch some YouTube (channel: that’s a bad idea).

XEAL@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y

"Seize the day"

I imagine people are being told to have a seizure