TIL one of the world’s oldest active websites lets you virtually attack Barney the Dinosaur

https://impressive.net/games/barney/fun.cgi

From the Anti-Barney Humor Wikipedia article:

The Barney Fun Page is an early website that allows users to attack a crude drawing of Barney with icons representing a knife, gun, and other weapons. Hosted originally on a University of Alberta computer system, the website was created in 1994. It is among the oldest websites in the world still operating as of 2025.

222 points · 30 comments · view on lemmy.world

30 Comments

DudeImMacGyver@kbin.earth · 32 pts · 333d (2 replies)

I remember altering the original DOOM to let me fight Barney

dmention7@midwest.social · 13 pts · 333d

Hell yeah, I remember my dad picking up that on a free floppy disk from a game store in the mall.

hactar42@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 333d

I had a modded version that made it all characters from The Tick

DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 333d

I killed Barney, so don't bother.

baggachipz@sh.itjust.works · 8 pts · 333d

I remember that, I thought it was the greatest thing ever. Cringey nerdy shit, in hindsight.

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 8 pts · 333d (3 replies)

🎶I hate you,

you hate me,

We're a totally fucked up family!🎶

CookieOfFortune@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 333d

Hmm, I’ve always known it as:

Let’s get together and kill Barney

Breezy@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 333d (1 reply)

I hate you

You hate me

Lets chase barney up a tree

With a big fat shotgun

Shot him in the head

Now we're glad barney is dead.

hactar42@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 332d

Our version was slightly different at the end:

With a big fat gun
And a bullet in his head
Aren't you glad that fuckers dead

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 333d

My first mod I ever installed turned some of the monsters in DOOM to Barney

Treczoks@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 333d

Reminds me of the days when I accessed Tim Barners-Lee original server at CERN.

expatriado@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 333d

I was hoping it would end with🎵clean up, clean up🎵the corpses

WindyRebel@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 333d

I only read your title and the first thing that came to mind was the Jihad to Destroy Barney on the World Wide Web. Shit was lit when I was like 15.

fritobugger2017@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 333d (1 reply)

I was in my mid-20s when Barney first aired. So many of my friends were having kids, so Barney was on at their houses frequently. He was hard to avoid sometimes and it was awful.

hactar42@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 333d

I was a teenager and had two younger siblings who were obsessed with it. I remember getting in trouble for hiding one of their VHS tapes.

Throskie@midwest.social · 5 pts · 333d (2 replies)

Anyone ever play the old BBS Door/DOS game BarneySplat?

Jerkface@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 333d (1 reply)

I did, right next to another one called Cripple Smash? Something like that. It was some line in the 206 area code.

Throskie@midwest.social · 2 pts · 332d

My local BBS didn't have it so i played in local mode.

BBS time was reserved for LORD and reading Fidonet flame wars lol

DarkFuture@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 332d

Lol.

I'll file this under "Things I Haven't Seen Or Thought About In 25 Years".

Blast from the past.

InvalidName2@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 333d (5 replies)

In 19 nindee something, my niece was watching Barney during one of my "babysitting" sessions and out of the blue she told me she wanted to go to the potty so I picked her up and carried her to the bathroom.

While she was in there taking care of business, I started to smell something foul and then I looked down at my clothes and saw a neon green chunk of something, approximately rectangular in shape with some greenish coating on it.

What the fuck ya'll. WHAT IN THE HOLY FUCK???

I'm still nearly gagging thinking of it and the smell. If you could multiply the worst smelling shit you've ever taken by the smell of a rotten deer by the side of the road you'd still only be 33% of the way to how that green stuff smelled. And I'm certain it came from my niece.

So what the fuck was that? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IT?

titanicx@lemmy.zip · 7 pts · 333d (2 replies)

The way you said 1990 is infuriating, so much that nothing after what you wrote was even read by me. I'm sorry, but I hope that someone makes a similar website for you.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 333d

The Kaiser stole our number 90.

hactar42@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 332d

It's a crossover between Nine Inch Nail and Dee Snider

Sundiata@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 332d

I think I spotted the protagonist.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 333d

Bile maybe? But that's dark green.

jaybone@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 333d (3 replies)

Was JavaScript even a thing in 1994? Certainly flash wasn’t. I wonder what this looked like. I remember text websites with the lynx browser.

hark@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 333d (2 replies)

Here is the site: https://impressive.net/games/barney/fun.cgi