The usual

When I pour my dog's food I tell her 'yes! This is super rich and tasty food for very small, and very good, and very beautiful doggies! D'ya see? It says it right here (it doesn't, actually, it only says it's for small dogs but she can't read), see? There's even a picture! But this doggy isn't as good, or as beautiful, or as small as my wee girl is, is it?' And then I have to pet her, kiss her on the fore head, and point to her plate and say 'come on! Do eat it!' Or she just would keep staring at me like waiting.

Everytime i add the freeze dried chicken to the cat's food i say "all aboard for the night chicken!" No one gets the reference, not even me.

“Would Madam care for the salmon?” — me to my cat

Cereal again, sweetie?

same as every year, James

Speaking of showbiz and feeding pets, I'm a big fan of Hamilton. So when feeding my cat, I often tell him "You've got a hunger. That's alright, I was just like you, when I was younger."

I'm going to start using 'that's showbiz, baby' for all sorts of mundane daily happenings.