by now I've seen countless transition pictures, and every one of them seems like magic.
like y'all just showing a picture of a brother and sister and expecting expecting me to believe they are the same person. my brain is unable to believe it.
That's largely bias due to, well, if the transition isn't going well or HRT isn't leading to great results, people are much less likely to post that openly online
yayy thanks. I mean I didn't start that young only when it was viable at 18 aka a year before moving out cause that is the amount of time I would be able to hide
it's OK not to see it now, but when you're older you'll look back and see; I hope you will feel immense pride and gratitude to the younger person you are now - because you deserve to feel that
When I was your age I was starting to buy skirts and "cross-dress" privately (at home) more, that's when I chose my name and started experimenting with makeup. Then I repressed for more than a decade, so ... yeah, don't do what I did.
I know it probably feels too late to you, but 18 is a much better time than you realize - the body continues to androgenize significantly. I couldn't grow a beard until my mid 20s, my voice significantly changed in my 20s - the changes are huge.
So even starting at 18 you've saved yourself significant distress and suffering that waiting longer would have caused. ❤️
That iss fair. Hey I am glad you found yourself eventually. I hold the belief that no matter the starting age or genetics transition can lead to happiness for anyone. Time and time again I have seen older trans women who started much later than I glowing so what I mean to say is that first it is never too late (no matter how painful and slow progress is) and that I am proud of you that you eventually started and took steps to control of your gender expression too ❤️
oh yes, fully agree - it's never too late to start, even if it's pretty much always better to start earlier 😅
for me anyway that was true (I don't want to assume too much about others, but it does seem like it's true for most of us) - I didn't think I would ever pass and I thought I was signing up for being visibly trans the rest of my life.
In particular what I think is worth it is the hormones - I really didn't understand how significantly the wrong hormones can impact mood and mental health.
So from that perspective I tend to think we need to be on the right hormones regardless of what age we are - just to be healthy and happy. Obviously it's hard to live as a visibly trans person, but you just never know how it's going to go (I was completely wrong, for example).
Life is so much better than I ever understood it could be - and I was so mistaken about gender, lol. My whole life I thought it was something trivial, that gender was just social and gender expression was about what clothes I wore or how I was treated socially - I didn't understand gender has such strong biological components and could be a major medical issue with serious consequences for mental health (caused by the hormones and biology, not from something like not being able to wear the clothes you want).
Anyway, I just wish I had learned some things earlier, and it makes my heart full when I see younger folks figuring it out and living better lives 🥰
Sure, but you can always just start HRT right now. That's really the most important thing in my mind.
Social transition can happen later, but you can't go back and start HRT earlier. Starting estrogen can also give you important information and can be very clarifying.
I wish HRT were viewed more as an early intervention and diagnostic tool than the "extreme" step that I think we all start off believing it is. You can even take it for several months without long-term effects.
Once I started estrogen it was clear to me, all the questioning and denial I had about trans was irrelevant because I was going to be taking estrogen no matter what from that point on - it radically changed my mood and mental health for the better (I should clarify I was doing monotherapy injections - basically enough estrogen to suppress testosterone production).
Anyway, don't wait to start living - repression is never a good idea.
Yup, its just that I have a therapist, a pretty accepting family and I still don't feel safe talking to anyone. It really makes you feel quite lonely...
I do plan on starting HRT this or next month, but I will be moving countries in three or four months, so thats also a complication.
Anyway, I will do what I can. Thank you for the thoughtful awnser <3.
there are usually local LGBT+ and trans support groups you can go to - the trans support groups are usually full of early transitioners and people whose egg just cracked, so you might find some similar people there, or at least people going through similar hurdles
you might also look for a therapist who is gender-informed and works with trans patients on gender dysphoria - that might make it easier for you to feel safe
but ultimately, you just can't really expect to feel fully safe, part of transition is that extreme vulnerability and putting one foot in front of the other towards transition even though it feels like you're going to die if you do
and yeah, moving might complicate the situation, but it's just a temporary setback and hopefully you will find a way to access HRT in the new country
Good luck with your struggles - just know you aren't alone. Feel free to DM me anytime 🫶
congrats on the two months! andd thanks. Also stay strong and patient early progress can be so slow unless you have blessed genetics just know there is light in the end of the tunnel.
64 Comments
IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world · 42 pts · 196d
by now I've seen countless transition pictures, and every one of them seems like magic.
like y'all just showing a picture of a brother and sister and expecting expecting me to believe they are the same person. my brain is unable to believe it.
HRT, is the closest we have to magic potions.
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 19 pts · 196d
it is fucking sorcery
IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 196d
that's the most fun kind of sorcery, unlike normal sorcery
alsaaas@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 11 pts · 196d
That's largely bias due to, well, if the transition isn't going well or HRT isn't leading to great results, people are much less likely to post that openly online
IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 196d
God dammit, you can't replace magic with survivorship bias, I'm as now.
alsaaas@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 195d
? WDYM
Also sorry, but that "magic" doesn't exist, some people are just lucky AF in a variety of factors
IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 195d
sorry, meant "I'm sad now" but I stuck at typing on my phone.
alsaaas@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 195d
Ah kk, also mood on both the "I'm sad now" and the typos TwT
IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 195d
I got a PhD, I have published books, I teach English for fucks sake, but when I type on a phone all of that means sit
NikkiDimes@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 195d
One of us, one id ya, ibe pf ys!
alsaaas@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 195d
woah, cool! It's wild what kind of ppl you meet on the Threadiverse :>
dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 38 pts · 197d
such great progress, congrats!!
EDIT: just wanted to point out that you've done yourself a huge favor by starting so young, well done 💖
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 19 pts · 196d
yayy thanks. I mean I didn't start that young only when it was viable at 18 aka a year before moving out cause that is the amount of time I would be able to hide
Berengaria_of_Navarre@lemmy.world · 28 pts · 196d
"I didn’t start that young only when it was viable at 18"
Girl, you're still little more than a baby.
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 12 pts · 196d
fiiiine
dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 6 pts · 196d
it's OK not to see it now, but when you're older you'll look back and see; I hope you will feel immense pride and gratitude to the younger person you are now - because you deserve to feel that
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 4 pts · 196d
you are so sweet 💜
dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 19 pts · 196d
When I was your age I was starting to buy skirts and "cross-dress" privately (at home) more, that's when I chose my name and started experimenting with makeup. Then I repressed for more than a decade, so ... yeah, don't do what I did.
I know it probably feels too late to you, but 18 is a much better time than you realize - the body continues to androgenize significantly. I couldn't grow a beard until my mid 20s, my voice significantly changed in my 20s - the changes are huge.
So even starting at 18 you've saved yourself significant distress and suffering that waiting longer would have caused. ❤️
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 10 pts · 196d
That iss fair. Hey I am glad you found yourself eventually. I hold the belief that no matter the starting age or genetics transition can lead to happiness for anyone. Time and time again I have seen older trans women who started much later than I glowing so what I mean to say is that first it is never too late (no matter how painful and slow progress is) and that I am proud of you that you eventually started and took steps to control of your gender expression too ❤️
dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 9 pts · 196d
oh yes, fully agree - it's never too late to start, even if it's pretty much always better to start earlier 😅
for me anyway that was true (I don't want to assume too much about others, but it does seem like it's true for most of us) - I didn't think I would ever pass and I thought I was signing up for being visibly trans the rest of my life.
In particular what I think is worth it is the hormones - I really didn't understand how significantly the wrong hormones can impact mood and mental health.
So from that perspective I tend to think we need to be on the right hormones regardless of what age we are - just to be healthy and happy. Obviously it's hard to live as a visibly trans person, but you just never know how it's going to go (I was completely wrong, for example).
Life is so much better than I ever understood it could be - and I was so mistaken about gender, lol. My whole life I thought it was something trivial, that gender was just social and gender expression was about what clothes I wore or how I was treated socially - I didn't understand gender has such strong biological components and could be a major medical issue with serious consequences for mental health (caused by the hormones and biology, not from something like not being able to wear the clothes you want).
Anyway, I just wish I had learned some things earlier, and it makes my heart full when I see younger folks figuring it out and living better lives 🥰
ChilledPeppers@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 196d
I am in that exact situation, but its so hard to bite the bullet, even more when I cant really talk to anyone about it. Sad times.
dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 6 pts · 196d
Sure, but you can always just start HRT right now. That's really the most important thing in my mind.
Social transition can happen later, but you can't go back and start HRT earlier. Starting estrogen can also give you important information and can be very clarifying.
I wish HRT were viewed more as an early intervention and diagnostic tool than the "extreme" step that I think we all start off believing it is. You can even take it for several months without long-term effects.
Once I started estrogen it was clear to me, all the questioning and denial I had about trans was irrelevant because I was going to be taking estrogen no matter what from that point on - it radically changed my mood and mental health for the better (I should clarify I was doing monotherapy injections - basically enough estrogen to suppress testosterone production).
Anyway, don't wait to start living - repression is never a good idea.
ChilledPeppers@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 4 pts · 196d
Yup, its just that I have a therapist, a pretty accepting family and I still don't feel safe talking to anyone. It really makes you feel quite lonely...
I do plan on starting HRT this or next month, but I will be moving countries in three or four months, so thats also a complication.
Anyway, I will do what I can. Thank you for the thoughtful awnser <3.
dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 196d
there are usually local LGBT+ and trans support groups you can go to - the trans support groups are usually full of early transitioners and people whose egg just cracked, so you might find some similar people there, or at least people going through similar hurdles
you might also look for a therapist who is gender-informed and works with trans patients on gender dysphoria - that might make it easier for you to feel safe
but ultimately, you just can't really expect to feel fully safe, part of transition is that extreme vulnerability and putting one foot in front of the other towards transition even though it feels like you're going to die if you do
and yeah, moving might complicate the situation, but it's just a temporary setback and hopefully you will find a way to access HRT in the new country
Good luck with your struggles - just know you aren't alone. Feel free to DM me anytime 🫶
Shirow@lemmy.zip · 23 pts · 196d
Wish I knew sooner to but better late than never ☺️
Awesome change though, in almost 2 months in.
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 11 pts · 196d
congrats on the two months! andd thanks. Also stay strong and patient early progress can be so slow unless you have blessed genetics just know there is light in the end of the tunnel.
Derpenheim@lemmy.zip · 13 pts · 196d
E G G
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 8 pts · 196d
E G G
cows_are_underrated@feddit.org · 3 pts · 196d
E G G
ThunderQueen@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 195d
Eryn6844@piefed.blahaj.zone · 12 pts · 196d
Beautiful! wish we could hang out!
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 8 pts · 196d
awww thanks ^^
belastend@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 12 pts · 196d
The glow up is insane
Coolkat@slrpnk.net · 10 pts · 196d
Oh do i love when you enter girlmod area and you are all smiling and look confident !!
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 196d
Yeah yayy
kittenzrulz123@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 9 pts · 196d
You look very pretty now :3
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 7 pts · 196d
Thankss
gaiety@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 8 pts · 196d
let's go!
toetallyautistic@thelemmy.club · 7 pts · 196d
congrats!! you look awesome
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 196d
Thank uuu
puppycat@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 5 pts · 196d
thank u for sharing, ur journey is genuinely inspiring to me
I hope HRT makes me as pretty as you one day🥺
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 196d
It will! You are not immune to hrt
bilouba@jlai.lu · 5 pts · 195d
Cis man here, not to simp, but you are very cute 😍
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 6 pts · 195d
Not my target demographic but thanks!
bilouba@jlai.lu · 3 pts · 195d
Wish you the best to find love ✨😊
Star@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 196d
Looking great! Happiness suits you :)
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 196d
aww thanks
sober_monk@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 196d
SLAY
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 195d
ayyy thanks
33550336@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 196d
Very nice!
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 195d
thanks!
irotsoma@piefed.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 196d
You look great!!!
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 196d
Thanks!
Nikki@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 195d
Roderick to hot girl timeline
looking amazing proud of you :)
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 194d
yay thank youu
tiny_hedgehog@piefed.social · 3 pts · 196d
Incredible transformation into your true self. Amazing.
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 196d
thhanks
tastetheplague@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 196d
Be still, my heart ❤️
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 195d
aw thamk
Daft_ish@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 195d
Adorbs
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 195d
tthanks!
ViolentMiracle@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 195d
You're so pretty !
WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 195d
thanks!
drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 195d