assuming you have running water, yeah you should be able to find a model that works. if you mean your landlord "won't let you", enjoy the sweet sensation of not giving a fuck what they think because they will never check. if for some reason you still can't, they make portable bidets that you don't even need to install. I have one that is basically just a water bottle with a curved nozzle for a cap, so you just have to fill it, aim, and squeeze to spray your ass. there are fancier ones with a battery and pump.
Many people assume a standalone bidet and don't realize there's cheap ones you can install on your existing toilet pretty easily. I bought a few ransoms randoms off of Amazon 6 years ago and they are still going strong.
I have a washlet from Toto, and the built in bidet is nice, but man the shape of the seat is so good. I would honestly use it just for the toilet seat part.
Doctor gave me Colesevelam, I forget what it's actually used for, but off-label: it binds matter together in your GI tract. Each pill lasts like 3-4 hours so as long as you take them regularly during the day (3x2 pills is max I think) you will have a sense of normalcy while at work. Once they wear off though you're back to business as usual.
I've had this maybe twice my whole life, it's usually 5-6 wipes and there's nothing left. Dunno what the fuck you're eating or doing to have that as a common problem.
That's why I finger blast myself until I get hard. I'm not German so I can't poop while erect and the flow stops. Just one very careful wipe after that and we're good to go.
25 Comments
rockerface@lemmy.cafe · 62 pts · 112d
Wiping mentioned on the internet, bidet sleeper agent activated
hOrni@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 112d
Yeah, like everybody has the possibility to install a bidet.
applebusch@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 15 pts · 112d
assuming you have running water, yeah you should be able to find a model that works. if you mean your landlord "won't let you", enjoy the sweet sensation of not giving a fuck what they think because they will never check. if for some reason you still can't, they make portable bidets that you don't even need to install. I have one that is basically just a water bottle with a curved nozzle for a cap, so you just have to fill it, aim, and squeeze to spray your ass. there are fancier ones with a battery and pump.
UnrefinedChihuahua@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 6 pts · 111d
Many people assume a standalone bidet and don't realize there's cheap ones you can install on your existing toilet pretty easily. I bought a few
ransomsrandoms off of Amazon 6 years ago and they are still going strong.binarytobis@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 111d
I have a washlet from Toto, and the built in bidet is nice, but man the shape of the seat is so good. I would honestly use it just for the toilet seat part.
rockerface@lemmy.cafe · 3 pts · 111d
I'm using a showerhead with narrow spray mode. It's not very convenient, but it gets the job done
zeezee@slrpnk.net · 0 pts · 111d
wopalopa@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 112d
bidet ftw
UnimportantHuman@lemmy.ml · 12 pts · 111d
GET A BIDET
FistingEnthusiast@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 112d
sobs in IBS...
PoliteDudeInTheMood@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 111d
Doctor gave me Colesevelam, I forget what it's actually used for, but off-label: it binds matter together in your GI tract. Each pill lasts like 3-4 hours so as long as you take them regularly during the day (3x2 pills is max I think) you will have a sense of normalcy while at work. Once they wear off though you're back to business as usual.
douz0a0bouz@midwest.social · 8 pts · 111d
This should've been posted in shitposts
TheGiantKorean@lemmy.today · 5 pts · 111d
Rub some Oxyclean on there. It's the stain specialist!
Mister_Hangman@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 111d
Chipotleaway!
SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 111d
90s solution. Phil Swift sealed his ass with FlexSeal.
nonentity@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 111d
It’s like wiping a marker.
MrQuallzin@pie.eyeofthestorm.place · 3 pts · 111d
Nothing worse than a Frictionless Wipe
RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 111d
Like trying to wipe away a grease pencil.
(The answer is fiber! Have a decent amount and sometimes its a ghost shit!)
Serpent@feddit.uk · 2 pts · 111d
Psilium husk is a god send
diffaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 112d
You need to use the millitary finger method☝️ Its environmentanly friendly cuz it only takes 1 square of toilet paper!
M137@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 111d
I've had this maybe twice my whole life, it's usually 5-6 wipes and there's nothing left. Dunno what the fuck you're eating or doing to have that as a common problem.
LetThereBeNick@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 111d
I'm convinced these people press too hard
vagrancyand@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 111d
That's why I finger blast myself until I get hard. I'm not German so I can't poop while erect and the flow stops. Just one very careful wipe after that and we're good to go.
chronicledmonocle@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 111d
I.....wat?
Tollana1234567@lemmy.today · 1 pts · 111d
its cocaine isnt it?