Mark woke up to the rays of the sun streaming through the slats on his blinds, cascading over his naked posterior. He stretched, his flanks lifting with his glutes as he greeted the sun. He rolled out of bed and put on compression shorts, the sinews of his haunches prominently showing through the thin fabric. He bottomed buttingly to the stairs, and derriered downwards.
Cassandra woke up to the rays of the sun streaming through the slats on her blinds, cascading over her naked chest. She stretched, her breasts lifting with her arms as she greeted the sun. She rolled out of bed and put on a shirt, her nipples prominently showing through the thin fabric. She breasted boobily to the stairs, and titted downwards.
its even funnier if you know finnish. there is a word in finnish that is about that and it means something a kin to fooling around/doing something badly (perseily)
"He vampired billionairely across the room, his sweetly-softcore rapey vibes engulfed her small feminine self-inserty hair, she looked exactly like [you, the girl reading this], and he was very vampirey and mysterious"
Dan Brown writing men: "He had steely grey eyes and was very smart. Scientists thought he was an idiot but that's because he was smarter than them and didn't spend as much time writing papers. He did four hundred pushups and took a shower. 'Not bad for a fifty five year-old guy', he thought, which was smarter than other thoughts even if those thoughts had won prizes."
I think this very much depends on where on the spectrum of the type of werewolf he falls. Are we taking Wolf-man basically just hairy guy with claws type, a monstrous bipedal wolf creature, or all the way to turning into a full fledged normal wolf but smart...
women are attracted to power and dominance. being rich makes you powerful and dominant. only she can tame his power!
it's that simple. it's a porno.
just like every porno for guy features a very attractive submissive sex addict who is obsessed with him and his dick and can't help herself from sucking/fucking on it every 5 minutes.
48 Comments
Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world · 162 pts · 90d
Mark woke up to the rays of the sun streaming through the slats on his blinds, cascading over his naked posterior. He stretched, his flanks lifting with his glutes as he greeted the sun. He rolled out of bed and put on compression shorts, the sinews of his haunches prominently showing through the thin fabric. He bottomed buttingly to the stairs, and derriered downwards.
The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world · 61 pts · 90d
That last line is incredible.
Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world · 102 pts · 90d
Thanks! It's all just adapted from the original:
The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world · 31 pts · 90d
Haha, I thought it sounded a little familiar.
samus12345@sh.itjust.works · 14 pts · 90d
Doing something buttingly sounds more amusing than doing it boobily.
anomnom@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 89d
Fits with the werewolf joke. But when our dog does it we call it bum scooting.
reksas@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 89d
its even funnier if you know finnish. there is a word in finnish that is about that and it means something a kin to fooling around/doing something badly (perseily)
prenatal_confusion@feddit.org · 9 pts · 90d
Where is this from? I need it.
Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 86d
https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/breasted-boobily
RBWells@lemmy.world · 29 pts · 90d
Gay men writing men!
FishFace@piefed.social · 9 pts · 89d
A furry wrote this
MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 89d
::: spoiler if you trade the compression shorts to a towel around his waist, you can say His penis bounced penisly down the stairs :::
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 89d
Oops my penis! Will someone get that for me before it gets out the door?
I swear it's worse than the cats
Aqarius@lemmy.world · 98 pts · 90d
BigDiction@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 90d
Very mysterious indeed. I often ponder what runs through his mind.
Vampire Fantasy Football League
groucho@retrolemmy.com · 62 pts · 89d
Dan Brown writing men: "He had steely grey eyes and was very smart. Scientists thought he was an idiot but that's because he was smarter than them and didn't spend as much time writing papers. He did four hundred pushups and took a shower. 'Not bad for a fifty five year-old guy', he thought, which was smarter than other thoughts even if those thoughts had won prizes."
pyre@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 89d
that's hilarious
RickyRigatoni@piefed.zip · 59 pts · 90d
His pecs bounced pecily as he swung his football bat.
Aneb@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 89d
Foot-long bat* Some call it a third leg but me
OldChicoAle@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 89d
Damn that's hot
Rentlar@lemmy.ca · 30 pts · 90d
I'll admit I have never thought about it before now.
::: spoiler what I'd never thought about before now
If a man were to transform into a werewolf... would his dick transform into a canine one?
:::
Winged_Hussar@lemmy.world · 53 pts · 90d
Hopefully
I mean, probably
orenj@leminal.space · 18 pts · 90d
Take a look at bad dragon's werewolf line, you'll find your answer
ech@lemmy.ca · 12 pts · 90d
Depends on who is drawing the furry porn and why.
OwOarchist@pawb.social · 3 pts · 89d
If you draw your werewolves with human-like dicks, can you even call yourself a furry?
vzqq@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 10 pts · 90d
That’s the point of transforming, yeah? You get a wolf nose, wolf ears, wolf paws, and yes, all the rest of the anatomy.
couldhavebeenyou@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 90d
In France, they call it le buttox
ParlimentOfDoom@piefed.zip · 8 pts · 90d
I think this very much depends on where on the spectrum of the type of werewolf he falls. Are we taking Wolf-man basically just hairy guy with claws type, a monstrous bipedal wolf creature, or all the way to turning into a full fledged normal wolf but smart...
AFKBRBChocolate@lemmy.ca · 4 pts · 89d
Can we agree that even the first one would transform at least a little?
OwOarchist@pawb.social · 3 pts · 89d
Yes, but 90% of that would just be the pubes growing completely out of control.
Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 7 pts · 90d
Of course, that’s one of the biggest draws to werewolf dude: Thicc knot!
Battle_Masker@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 7 pts · 90d
Depends on the author/artist
CancerMancer@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 89d
What is weirder?
tacosanonymous@mander.xyz · 5 pts · 90d
Ali Hazelwood would say, "Yes."
DagwoodIII@piefed.social · 4 pts · 90d
Depends on what kind of werewolf.
Some weres look exactly like a normal wolf, and others are part human-part beast.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 89d
No his dick transforms into a tiny werewolf in a trenchcoat and fedora. It's really quite adorable.
Siethron@lemmy.world · 27 pts · 89d
You'd think being a Billionaire would be a turn OFF in this day and age.
Are people reading this erotica unironically class traitors?
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world · -6 pts · 89d
women are attracted to power and dominance. being rich makes you powerful and dominant. only she can tame his power!
it's that simple. it's a porno.
just like every porno for guy features a very attractive submissive sex addict who is obsessed with him and his dick and can't help herself from sucking/fucking on it every 5 minutes.
are men class traitors for watching pornhub?
elekitty@sh.itjust.works · 11 pts · 89d
is the very attractive submissive sex addict rich and from old or new money?
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 89d
men would only care about that if they were from old money.
HulkSmashBurgers@reddthat.com · 25 pts · 90d
Isn't this basically what romantasy is about?
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 89d
No. Where are the allosauruses. Allosaurii. Allosaurids. Dammit.
sundray@lemmus.org · 20 pts · 90d
… Go on.
kurcatovium@piefed.social · 10 pts · 90d
We need to focus on important things! Is that penis perfectly sized in a human or a wolf form?
HulkSmashBurgers@reddthat.com · 4 pts · 90d
I'm guessing…both?
couldhavebeenyou@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 90d
Hairy shaft
EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com · 3 pts · 89d
Bristly for her pleasure
IWW4@lemmy.zip · 9 pts · 90d
Well.. that was a rollercoaster!
HAHAHAHA