Beware of Bruce

813 points · 40 comments · view on lemmy.world

40 Comments

synapse1278@lemmy.world · 92 pts · 47d

Chaunticleer@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 77 pts · 47d

Broadfern@lemmy.world · 36 pts · 47d

Those berries never stood a chance

Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de · 31 pts · 46d (1 reply)

That is a very big hole for the amount of splatter that occurs.

starik@lemmy.today · 17 pts · 46d

He’s very careful not to splatter that way.

halfapage@lemmy.world · 29 pts · 47d
[ removed ]
IcedRaktajino@startrek.website · 25 pts · 47d

In case anyone still doubted that birds are modern day dinosaurs.

JasonDJ@lemmy.zip · 25 pts · 47d (5 replies)

It's like when I give my dog a hardboiled egg and either he swallows it on one gulp or I find bits of yolk all over the house.

baguettefish@discuss.tchncs.de · 10 pts · 47d (4 replies)

or they keep it in their mouth and find some safe place to destroy it and leave bits everywhere

JasonDJ@lemmy.zip · 16 pts · 46d (3 replies)

That's exactly what he does.

Usually he sheepishly accepts with a soft jaw and walks over to his spot under the kitchen table where he'll lick it and savor it for a bit before he chomps down and eats the whole thing, and he's usually pretty good about cleaning up after himself.

But sometimes he takes it to-go, and starts chewing while he walks away.

That's when there's trouble. He's not very good at walking and chewing eggs at the same time.

ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 46d (2 replies)

Dogs are the best.

JasonDJ@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 46d (1 reply)

There was a good long while when he'd try to take a drink of water from his bowl to-go, too. I dunno how he did it. I didn't think dogs were capable. But he'd just like get a slosh of water and hold it in his mouth and just let it leak out as he giddily pranced about the kitchen.

Dogs are the best.

ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 46d

This is how the stray I took in let me know she preferred eating outside. She picked up her bowl in her teeth and left a trail of beef chunks across the house, carrying the bowl outside to her preferred spot. We've agreed on eating outside when it's nice and inside when it's wet.

Sirdubdee@piefed.social · 19 pts · 46d

I imagine he plays Huey Lewis and the News while doing this?

Avicenna@programming.dev · 17 pts · 46d

Well Clarice. Have the berries stopped screaming yet?

PlaidBaron@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 47d (1 reply)

I like that you outlined the doorway for us.

victorz@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 46d

lol I didn't notice that. Kind of weird.

MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 46d (2 replies)

The_Picard_Maneuver@piefed.world · 3 pts · 46d (1 reply)

I bet there's a second phase too!

MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 46d

Part of me wants to see a bird like souls boss, bit seeing how they made the bird like minor enemies in Elden Ring, I might actually rage quit a full on bird souls like boss xD

architectonas@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 46d (2 replies)

Seeing this really gives you an idea of why berries evolved to have their seeds spread all around.

nailbar@sopuli.xyz · 7 pts · 46d (1 reply)

My favorite berry evolution trick is the mistletoe, where the berries make the poop sticky, so the birds will have to wipe their butts against tree trunks, and that's where the next one will grow.

architectonas@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 45d

That's amazing, thanks for sharing!

JLock17@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 47d

Bruce consumes in the flesh dome

Miller@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 47d

You need a pulled apart Barbie doll in there.

RickyRigatoni@piefed.zip · 12 pts · 47d

Cute dog

toynbee@piefed.social · 10 pts · 47d (1 reply)

I recently had a fairly invasive surgery - sufficiently so that they made me stay overnight to make sure I could walk afterwards.

During my recovery I was in a semi private room. The other occupant was named Bruce. I saw him walk to the bathroom once, but didn't see any more of him than his butt (because of hospital gowns) until we both left.

We talked a lot, though. He was almost exactly twice my age, so our views didn't perfectly align, but otherwise he was very nice.

edit: I couldn't say for certain what he was doing on the other side of the curtain but I never witnessed him eating berries or occupying a dome.

verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 46d

Awww, that is lovely. I hope you and Bruce astound medical history with your recovery speeds. Their medical minds will look like a berry dome.

NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 46d (1 reply)

Khorne cares not from where the blood flows.

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 45d

Scamming Khorne with berry juice.

panda_abyss@lemmy.ca · 8 pts · 47d

It looks like cleanup after the merman in Cabin in the Woods!

phoenixz@lemmy.ca · 7 pts · 45d

Should've called him Dexter

victorz@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 46d

Dexter kill room.

MonkeMischief@lemmy.today · 6 pts · 47d (2 replies)

Last name "Banner", by chance?

"Puny berry!" [Roaaaars]

Akasazh@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 46d (1 reply)

I would've gone with 'Lee'

MonkeMischief@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 46d

Ah, of course! Inventor and master of Tweet Kune Do! :D

phoenixz@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 46d

Note like the thunderdome... Good thing some red fruit was left or it would have looked like a dexter scene

Sam_Bass@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 46d

now teach him to do his own house cleaning

Kory@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 47d (1 reply)

What's wrong with his feet?

ICastFist@programming.dev · 7 pts · 47d

Excessive murder

MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 47d

A lesson was learned.